...or maybe he was Jamaican, the accents are similar but the douche factor is the same and i could give a flying fecal part for these rampant little criminal master minds that have no hope of pulling anything off other than crank calls.
Apparently, their are enough idiots in the US that these scam scourge feel they can be profitable. I don;t know who is selling them the elderly contact information but I am going to put Wal-Mart behind this little disgusting act.
The idiot called from an unblocked number asking if my Mother shops at Wal-Mart and said she won a cash award.
She handed me the phone and I said ni my very nice 'hello kitty' voice, "What's the scam?"
The dude hung up.
Shocker!!
Next, the call came from a blocked number and I kept answering and they kept hanging up.
So they called one last time and I did not hang up. I left the phone locked on there call placed the phone down on the counter so it would make that irritating piercing noise for some reason.
Its a fun glitch in the phone when you have a crank call from a crack head.
Anyhoo,
They went to chapter two fo the most idiot scam artists in the world and attempted the following little diddy for us:
"Hello, I am kar amba Abu and I am CEO of the Nigerian bank Company. We have $2.5 million of your funds locked in transit and we need blah, blah, blah....."
Turnip trucks a plenty but not in this neck off the hills.
My Mother turning this into a major drama, I had to deal with it.
Always a lady, I gave a polite...
"You Nigerian Fuck!!"
...of which he responded by redialing my parents number over and over. Always hanging up when I was trying to give him more of my pleasantries. ]
Quite rude if you ask me!!!
Anyhoo, nipped it in the butt quickly..I couldn't play anymore with the dead head, i had work to get to.
*77 took care of that little douche's temper tantrum.
Go rage on someone in the boondocks dickhead.
We have private call blocking!!
Warn your GP's and elderly neighbors to just hit *77 on their AT&T phone. Be sure what other phone companies offer, so check around.
and it will block all calls that withhold their phone number.
This is the Blonde's Service Announcement!!
7.26.2011
7.25.2011
take the Bad with the Good
I am checking out my birth chart and this is what is up this week:
Pretty acurate still....
You are more sensitive to, and frustrated by, anything that makes you feel stifled, restricted, oppressed, or restrained now. Your desire for independence or to feel unique and original is strongly stimulated, but you may not be going about it in the best manner. In fact, you might come across as rebellious, cantankerous, or hard to please. You may be especially impatient, impulsive, or prone to taking foolish risks. This stems from the desire to make changes in your life or to shake things up because you are sensitive to that which is boring, monotonous, or stale in your life.
I got a reminder of being careful to follow the right path.
The other night I watched Tatum O'Neil's reality show with Ryan on Oprah's network OWN. Its funny, I totally get where Tatum is coming form and that she is trying to work out things from her past.
I am in the same cycle of my life and trying to pull out successfully.
I have acknowledge the issues and now I am working on just letting them go and moving on. Sometimes the process is down right hard and sometimes certain things will catch the old wind of the past and stir up controversy with family.
You have to find closure on your own.
If you are looking for someone else to close the door to past regression or feelings...its always going to have a door stop in front of the door jam. Its going to stay cracked open with room for a slight breeze to set the door wide open and you back 10 feet from the finishing line of a happy life.
You have to pull that door shut on your own. Find closure from within...
I and Tatum must do that for ourselves...
But its nice to have a little virtual competition.
Mine won't be Hollywood style on a reality show which makes my odds a little more favorable.
You can live happily ever after with those who might have done you, a few things wrong.
The Blonde has a chart, not steps!!
Pretty acurate still....
You are more sensitive to, and frustrated by, anything that makes you feel stifled, restricted, oppressed, or restrained now. Your desire for independence or to feel unique and original is strongly stimulated, but you may not be going about it in the best manner. In fact, you might come across as rebellious, cantankerous, or hard to please. You may be especially impatient, impulsive, or prone to taking foolish risks. This stems from the desire to make changes in your life or to shake things up because you are sensitive to that which is boring, monotonous, or stale in your life.
I got a reminder of being careful to follow the right path.
The other night I watched Tatum O'Neil's reality show with Ryan on Oprah's network OWN. Its funny, I totally get where Tatum is coming form and that she is trying to work out things from her past.
I am in the same cycle of my life and trying to pull out successfully.
I have acknowledge the issues and now I am working on just letting them go and moving on. Sometimes the process is down right hard and sometimes certain things will catch the old wind of the past and stir up controversy with family.
You have to find closure on your own.
If you are looking for someone else to close the door to past regression or feelings...its always going to have a door stop in front of the door jam. Its going to stay cracked open with room for a slight breeze to set the door wide open and you back 10 feet from the finishing line of a happy life.
You have to pull that door shut on your own. Find closure from within...
I and Tatum must do that for ourselves...
But its nice to have a little virtual competition.
Mine won't be Hollywood style on a reality show which makes my odds a little more favorable.
You can live happily ever after with those who might have done you, a few things wrong.
The Blonde has a chart, not steps!!
7.23.2011
Oh Beth
The very first rock band song I heard; it was the backside of my older sisters 45 and to this day...the best song ever!!
Too Much Love Will Kill You Everytime
goda dei miei amici!!
Its been a bad day, let music lift us up!!!
The Blonde's heart is in Norway!!!
7.22.2011
The Breast Feeding Babydoll
Maybe I have a perverted mind but I can't help but think of other places someone might place the magnetic bra and have the baby doll sucking on some unsavory body parts...
If I can think this creatively, imagine little Johnny stealing the baby doll and bra
from baby sister and wanking his little tiddley tot with the sucking mechanical mouth.
but than again, I grew up with the baby doll with the magic disappearing milk bottle.
Think how many pedophiles logged on to youtube to watch an 8 year old put on a bra and play Mommie.
On another note, the chick who breast feeds 4 year old Ari in the park is not only gross its unnatural and someone needs to have a serious talk with reaching healthy boundaries in the maturing of their chi...hii..ii..ld..!!
When they have teeth and can walk, yu need to loose the tit Mother.
I thought my cat's crusty hairball was gross but this apparently beat it by 30% gross factor.
breast feeding is natural to the Mother and child but, even I, as a woman am not comfortable with a strange woman's tit dangling while calling for little Betty to come hither at my local Starbucks.
The Blonde is not into new age rugrat rearing!!
80% is What You Do
20% is what fate has in store for you.
I am suffering a few minor setbacks when it comes to playing catch up and saving for my university future.
80% is what I can handle, what happens or does not happen because of me.
Then there is the pesky 20% - no matter how hard I apply myself, no matter how hard I try to get where I am going - a mile long road block hits and I am stuck.
Faced with having to turn around and find another way.
I could be unconventional and go off the beaten path and work in camouflage hiding myself from that 20% fate but it will soon catch up with me.
So what is a Blonde to do?
Watch sappy John Hughes films today, wash the crusted hairball off my duvet, play virtual host to HCG protocol confused...
and keep on...
keeping on!!
Its too damn hot to push through that road blocks today, anyway.
The Blonde is 100% glad its Friday!!
I am suffering a few minor setbacks when it comes to playing catch up and saving for my university future.
80% is what I can handle, what happens or does not happen because of me.
Then there is the pesky 20% - no matter how hard I apply myself, no matter how hard I try to get where I am going - a mile long road block hits and I am stuck.
Faced with having to turn around and find another way.
I could be unconventional and go off the beaten path and work in camouflage hiding myself from that 20% fate but it will soon catch up with me.
So what is a Blonde to do?
Watch sappy John Hughes films today, wash the crusted hairball off my duvet, play virtual host to HCG protocol confused...
and keep on...
keeping on!!
Its too damn hot to push through that road blocks today, anyway.
The Blonde is 100% glad its Friday!!
7.21.2011
Unattainable Dreams
How many times can I be lead up a mountain, to be shown everything I want and work so hard to get...
"Here, here is your dream, laid out for you. Try to reach out and grab it."
And just as a reach out to grab it with all my might,
A gust of my reality whips up under my feet and thrusts me back down the mountain.
How many times must i be told by the powers that be...
I can't have it, no matter how hard I try.
When do I break?
When do I say...
Enough is enough!
1 year?
5 years?
10 years?
Am I cursed?
If this life is only a lesson to learn from a past life than I am done.
I don't feel it really should continue.
There is karmic retribution for past sins and than there is just fucking abuse by the Gods.
I am going to keep beating down the doors until I have exhausted everything.
But I do feel its totally acceptable to cash in my lessons and move on to another life within 5 years of this one.
Its a date with destiny...
5 years from now on my birthday...if life keeps handing me raw deals...
I will know I tried my hardest and will have no regrets to carry with me in the next life.
Surviving a life is not a life worth living!!
The BLonde will set her own agenda!
"Here, here is your dream, laid out for you. Try to reach out and grab it."
And just as a reach out to grab it with all my might,
A gust of my reality whips up under my feet and thrusts me back down the mountain.
How many times must i be told by the powers that be...
I can't have it, no matter how hard I try.
When do I break?
When do I say...
Enough is enough!
1 year?
5 years?
10 years?
Am I cursed?
If this life is only a lesson to learn from a past life than I am done.
I don't feel it really should continue.
There is karmic retribution for past sins and than there is just fucking abuse by the Gods.
I am going to keep beating down the doors until I have exhausted everything.
But I do feel its totally acceptable to cash in my lessons and move on to another life within 5 years of this one.
Its a date with destiny...
5 years from now on my birthday...if life keeps handing me raw deals...
I will know I tried my hardest and will have no regrets to carry with me in the next life.
Surviving a life is not a life worth living!!
The BLonde will set her own agenda!
7.17.2011
Bumble the Blonde
I was going to write a little diddy on chemistry.com and eharmony.com but something caught my attention at the local HEB grocery store today.
Bumble and Bumble hair products run $45 a bottle on sale. The sales clerk said its flying off the shelves. I hardly believe that when there is a sale on the couture hair products. Things that command that price and fly off the shelf stay at the chosen rip-off price.
But I have to say "hail to Bumble and Bumble" and to those that can afford a shampoo for $50. It shows me that not everyone is effected by the recession or poor job market.
I wonder if I made boo-coo bucks, would I buy the Bumble schlep?
I buy Infusium for $5 and when i read the ingredients of both products- my brand had all the ingredients as the Bumble and Bumble minus a root extract.
Out of curiosity, I might by the Bumble brand but more for novelty and armed with a biased opinion, I probably would not find it so fabulous and continue with my Infusium products.
But God Bless those insecure folks that thrive on paying big dollar to feed their need to be better than everyone else.
The Blonde is more humble than bumble!
Bumble and Bumble hair products run $45 a bottle on sale. The sales clerk said its flying off the shelves. I hardly believe that when there is a sale on the couture hair products. Things that command that price and fly off the shelf stay at the chosen rip-off price.
But I have to say "hail to Bumble and Bumble" and to those that can afford a shampoo for $50. It shows me that not everyone is effected by the recession or poor job market.
I wonder if I made boo-coo bucks, would I buy the Bumble schlep?
I buy Infusium for $5 and when i read the ingredients of both products- my brand had all the ingredients as the Bumble and Bumble minus a root extract.
Out of curiosity, I might by the Bumble brand but more for novelty and armed with a biased opinion, I probably would not find it so fabulous and continue with my Infusium products.
But God Bless those insecure folks that thrive on paying big dollar to feed their need to be better than everyone else.
The Blonde is more humble than bumble!
7.16.2011
Getting around with Meetup.com
Internet dating has become a plethora of grossness.
Its really become the club that was hot at one time but the fugly crowd got a hold of it and the cool peeps stopped showing up.
That's internet dating.
So how does the good crowd find people to meet?
The cool new place is meetup.com
You join a club of interest and you show up to outings and hopefully, eventually there might be a mate for you.
Personally don;t use it as a hook-up site, you will just end up ruining its intent.
Have fun in the club without looking for someone and you will start enjoying being by yourself, having fun with men and women, and you will loose the desperate tag that's been dangling off your aura.
Finding someone has come full circle and its not the bars or the web. Days of posting your age and salary, sifting through lies and false advertisements are left for the seedy crowd.
I noticed match.com went back to letting you surf the profiles without adding yours. A sure sign that they are on the outskirts and headed the way of myspace--if their lucky.
At least myspace has cool independent bands to listen to.
I personally only sign up for the ones that are special invitation but I am very careful about who I surround myself with because I am not a great judge of character and I need a virtual bouncer protecting me.
The Blonde found a new route to take!
Its really become the club that was hot at one time but the fugly crowd got a hold of it and the cool peeps stopped showing up.
That's internet dating.
So how does the good crowd find people to meet?
The cool new place is meetup.com
You join a club of interest and you show up to outings and hopefully, eventually there might be a mate for you.
Personally don;t use it as a hook-up site, you will just end up ruining its intent.
Have fun in the club without looking for someone and you will start enjoying being by yourself, having fun with men and women, and you will loose the desperate tag that's been dangling off your aura.
Finding someone has come full circle and its not the bars or the web. Days of posting your age and salary, sifting through lies and false advertisements are left for the seedy crowd.
I noticed match.com went back to letting you surf the profiles without adding yours. A sure sign that they are on the outskirts and headed the way of myspace--if their lucky.
At least myspace has cool independent bands to listen to.
I personally only sign up for the ones that are special invitation but I am very careful about who I surround myself with because I am not a great judge of character and I need a virtual bouncer protecting me.
The Blonde found a new route to take!
7.15.2011
Housewives of New York
I know many people call the housewives show a waste of time but i think its an excellent source of information regarding what to look out for in women friends.
I could take years of psychology courses and still not have the insight like this show has provided. Granted the women stir up conflict to benefit their face time on the shows and you have to take most of it with a martini and swallow hard.
But some of it, if you pay attention may see some characteristics or behavior in your own friends and will think twice next time when trusting them carte blanche.
Women seem to gravitate to a certain person in the group based on their certain situations at the time.
I probably would hang out with Kelly and bag the other wenches. Yes Kelly is an odd bird but she is not spiteful. Her little weird tirades are more or less for the face time.
Sonya...not at all...you are who you hang with and that is not who I want to be.
Countless....I like her, she is having fun and she gives appropriate digs when warranted.
Jill would bully me on everything and I would end up going in her direction and not the direction I want for myself.
Ms Kansas and Simon just freak me out. They are super creepy.
And the new chick...she has young kids and I am way passed my 'Mommie and me" friends.
And last but not least, Ms. Pino Grigio..if she is pregnant..gross!! 54 is not only ridiculous age to have a child but she is clearly doing it out of fear of losing her husband and that is never a good thing.
Right Martha?
I have tried to get with the jersey chicks but they are so harsh in mannerism...ughh!! I rather watch Dog the Bounty Hunter.
If I were doing women studies, they Housewives would be my thesis.
The Blonde rather be a lover!
I could take years of psychology courses and still not have the insight like this show has provided. Granted the women stir up conflict to benefit their face time on the shows and you have to take most of it with a martini and swallow hard.
But some of it, if you pay attention may see some characteristics or behavior in your own friends and will think twice next time when trusting them carte blanche.
Women seem to gravitate to a certain person in the group based on their certain situations at the time.
I probably would hang out with Kelly and bag the other wenches. Yes Kelly is an odd bird but she is not spiteful. Her little weird tirades are more or less for the face time.
Sonya...not at all...you are who you hang with and that is not who I want to be.
Countless....I like her, she is having fun and she gives appropriate digs when warranted.
Jill would bully me on everything and I would end up going in her direction and not the direction I want for myself.
Ms Kansas and Simon just freak me out. They are super creepy.
And the new chick...she has young kids and I am way passed my 'Mommie and me" friends.
And last but not least, Ms. Pino Grigio..if she is pregnant..gross!! 54 is not only ridiculous age to have a child but she is clearly doing it out of fear of losing her husband and that is never a good thing.
Right Martha?
I have tried to get with the jersey chicks but they are so harsh in mannerism...ughh!! I rather watch Dog the Bounty Hunter.
If I were doing women studies, they Housewives would be my thesis.
The Blonde rather be a lover!
7.14.2011
Busy Bee
I feel great knowing some income is coming in and once my financial packets come from SMU and know I can afford to go to school, I will look for work in Dallas.
I am still on my kick to work at a Sunflower market; especially the diet and supplement area. I really have found my nitch.
I am thinking I might try some bioscience classes but realize my ADD can cause me to drail from prelaw and thus my major will be in something analytical and maybe squeeze in the bioscience as a minor.
All in all, the world is not a fabulous place totally for me.
I still have a lot of catching up to do as far as finances and getting my car road ready but its slowly getting better.
I am going to have to raise my debt ceiling when school starts but until then I am trying to rake in some dough for the famine that will be coming ahead.
I will need to stack up on raman noodles.
It would be great if I could win the lottery to cover school expenses but somehow I don't think that is going to happen.
I did refer to my natal chart and there might be a money windfall in the form of a marriage.
I definitely will not hold my breath for that one.
Recovery in a recession is slow, for me and the country. I am just glad I am not alone.
It makes me feel like less of a loser.
The Blonde is rising up!!
I am still on my kick to work at a Sunflower market; especially the diet and supplement area. I really have found my nitch.
I am thinking I might try some bioscience classes but realize my ADD can cause me to drail from prelaw and thus my major will be in something analytical and maybe squeeze in the bioscience as a minor.
All in all, the world is not a fabulous place totally for me.
I still have a lot of catching up to do as far as finances and getting my car road ready but its slowly getting better.
I am going to have to raise my debt ceiling when school starts but until then I am trying to rake in some dough for the famine that will be coming ahead.
I will need to stack up on raman noodles.
It would be great if I could win the lottery to cover school expenses but somehow I don't think that is going to happen.
I did refer to my natal chart and there might be a money windfall in the form of a marriage.
I definitely will not hold my breath for that one.
Recovery in a recession is slow, for me and the country. I am just glad I am not alone.
It makes me feel like less of a loser.
The Blonde is rising up!!
7.12.2011
My Rock-a-Billy Died Tonight
One of my and Austin's favorite musicians was murdered last night.
Its weird because I had a dream of a dead man with slicked back hair lying like he was asleep underneath clear water behind my old pink house.
And in my dream, I told people he was there and all they did was murk up the water over him until you could not see him any more.
I kept telling them he is there, you have to wait for the water to clear.
Wait, wait...he is there...
and then a break in the cloudy water showed his face.
And there was my friend laying with his body straight, his hair slicked back , and a perfect Elvis like black suit...untouched.
I got the news today, he was murdered. Blunt force trauma in front of an Autozone.
I am very certain who and what he was waiting for and I hate that he was still involved in something that made me quit being his friend.
Its been awhile since I have spoken to him but I found the uncut samples that he asked me to produce and promote.
I played it tonight.
I never did think he could kill his fondness for the snow.
So I tucked the songs away and moved on.
I hate that I was right.
I hate even more that his 8 year old daughter that he loved more than life but less than coke is going to be without her Daddy.
Damn you, damn you!!
A steel guitar wont have my freind's fingers strumming on it ever again.
And my heart breaks tonight!
The Blonde lost her tune tonight!
Its weird because I had a dream of a dead man with slicked back hair lying like he was asleep underneath clear water behind my old pink house.
And in my dream, I told people he was there and all they did was murk up the water over him until you could not see him any more.
I kept telling them he is there, you have to wait for the water to clear.
Wait, wait...he is there...
and then a break in the cloudy water showed his face.
And there was my friend laying with his body straight, his hair slicked back , and a perfect Elvis like black suit...untouched.
I got the news today, he was murdered. Blunt force trauma in front of an Autozone.
I am very certain who and what he was waiting for and I hate that he was still involved in something that made me quit being his friend.
Its been awhile since I have spoken to him but I found the uncut samples that he asked me to produce and promote.
I played it tonight.
I never did think he could kill his fondness for the snow.
So I tucked the songs away and moved on.
I hate that I was right.
I hate even more that his 8 year old daughter that he loved more than life but less than coke is going to be without her Daddy.
Damn you, damn you!!
A steel guitar wont have my freind's fingers strumming on it ever again.
And my heart breaks tonight!
The Blonde lost her tune tonight!
Go Mustangs
I just received my acceptance letter for SMU in Dallas. This is my first choice school, one because of its locale and two becuz of its so much more awsome than living in Waco.
OK so my reason is location, location ,location.
But I am going to be somewhere for the next 3 years and I would like to find a personal life along with the studies.
Waco offers....nada to to me!
Am I going to get to go?
That is the Million dollar question only because it takes a small fortune to go to SMU and Baylor for that matter.
Hopefully, SMU will swing some grants my way and I will continue working through the summer to see if I can afford a studio in midtown.
Uptown is a definite no...the prices for a studio or 'G' plus.
I wonder if Dove or some anti-aging cream company will sponsor my way through school?
I figure the Larry Crowne film will shed a nice Hollywood light on the plight of the older student and push me toward my financial goal to cover coasts.
The Blonde is not quite of the gate!
OK so my reason is location, location ,location.
But I am going to be somewhere for the next 3 years and I would like to find a personal life along with the studies.
Waco offers....nada to to me!
Am I going to get to go?
That is the Million dollar question only because it takes a small fortune to go to SMU and Baylor for that matter.
Hopefully, SMU will swing some grants my way and I will continue working through the summer to see if I can afford a studio in midtown.
Uptown is a definite no...the prices for a studio or 'G' plus.
I wonder if Dove or some anti-aging cream company will sponsor my way through school?
I figure the Larry Crowne film will shed a nice Hollywood light on the plight of the older student and push me toward my financial goal to cover coasts.
The Blonde is not quite of the gate!
7.10.2011
Customer Support
but to keep them as a customer, let them be right.
I am customer support and that means taking the haters with the lovers. I am so uplifted when someone calls and brags about their success in losing weight.
GAH!
I had no idea how being overweight and wanting to lose it is such a huge battle for so many people. I did not realize what a prig I have been for berating them during cocktails with freinds.
I feel like a total douche.
I am 5'9" and never weighed more than 130 accept for when I was plumped up to 160 carrying Boo. he still owes me a tummy tuck. Of course Boo tells me if I didn't gorge on ice cream I wouldn't need anything.
Touche Boo Boo!!
Anyhoo,
I had wonderful customers today but for every fab contact there is always one to bring one down in this game.
I was called inept, uninformed, obviously stupid...duh..tah...duhhh
Did I hit my anger button and call on my condescending repetitoir to combat this hater femme.
NO! I did not!
If it wasd my company, I might be little less understanding but I am still the professional.
If she is frustrated, its not because of me or the product I support. She needed to vent and I am there to take her hot air and try to make it right.
You know the HCG is not a silly product and it can give people the boost they need to find a happier existence of life through healthier eating.
Sunscreen is still my major plug for people but modifying eating habits to feel better about yourself ranks second to the sunscreen.
So call me and beat me up. I am not giving up on you. I want you to feel beautiful even when its hard to look in a mirror and say it!!
I lost everything because of stupid mistakes I made along the way and I know how hard it is to face the mirror every morning and say, "Hey, today will be better."
And many today's passed by and nothing got better but I am not giving up and little by little my days are getting better.
I used to be so much more than this but I am only beginning to get back up.
So, go ahead and hit me with what you got, cause I got so much more!!
Bring it On!!
The Blonde can take some punch!
I am customer support and that means taking the haters with the lovers. I am so uplifted when someone calls and brags about their success in losing weight.
GAH!
I had no idea how being overweight and wanting to lose it is such a huge battle for so many people. I did not realize what a prig I have been for berating them during cocktails with freinds.
I feel like a total douche.
I am 5'9" and never weighed more than 130 accept for when I was plumped up to 160 carrying Boo. he still owes me a tummy tuck. Of course Boo tells me if I didn't gorge on ice cream I wouldn't need anything.
Touche Boo Boo!!
Anyhoo,
I had wonderful customers today but for every fab contact there is always one to bring one down in this game.
I was called inept, uninformed, obviously stupid...duh..tah...duhhh
Did I hit my anger button and call on my condescending repetitoir to combat this hater femme.
NO! I did not!
If it wasd my company, I might be little less understanding but I am still the professional.
If she is frustrated, its not because of me or the product I support. She needed to vent and I am there to take her hot air and try to make it right.
You know the HCG is not a silly product and it can give people the boost they need to find a happier existence of life through healthier eating.
Sunscreen is still my major plug for people but modifying eating habits to feel better about yourself ranks second to the sunscreen.
So call me and beat me up. I am not giving up on you. I want you to feel beautiful even when its hard to look in a mirror and say it!!
I lost everything because of stupid mistakes I made along the way and I know how hard it is to face the mirror every morning and say, "Hey, today will be better."
And many today's passed by and nothing got better but I am not giving up and little by little my days are getting better.
I used to be so much more than this but I am only beginning to get back up.
So, go ahead and hit me with what you got, cause I got so much more!!
Bring it On!!
The Blonde can take some punch!
The HCG Guinea Pig
I need another subject in my HCG study and so who better than my Ma-Me 'dieter extraordinaire'. She has never been able to stick to a diet, is a complete wiz at coming up with ingenious substitutes to sabotage any successful diet plan.
She is perfect for my study!!
I am already down from 132 to 129 in 3 days but I am someone who can follow a diet. I am not nibbling like I usually do.
Yesterday, I deviated the diet protocol with a banana (not on the list) and 4 breaded shrimp ( breaded is a serious no-no for me in general)but I cut out a helping of vegetables to equal it out.
See, you can be a tiny bit bad but it did effect the 1 lbs a day loss. I only lost ounces yesterday.
Anyhoo,
Back to my Guinea pig. On her first day of dieting, low and behold...substitutions in the form of blueberries with cream. Cream is not on the list. I will excuse the blueberries because they actually have less sugar than an apple and its a great anti-oxidant fruit.
I am fairly certain my results will be successful. I am fairly confident ma-me will be a living testament to what not to do on a diet protocol...
If the drops only work to motivate someone and keep them conscious about turning to a healthier nutritional lifestyle...its worth it.
But seriously, I do not feel as hungry as before. And I am always hungry.
I am a perpetual fridge door opener every time I pass the kitchen.
If and when i build a home...the kitchen will be around thhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gife pool in the pool house and unattached to my living quarters.
I tried painting the walls baby blue which some book suggested help curb appetite. It did nothing but make the kitchen look like a baby boy's room.
So, Ma-Me's BMI is 127. I would put her weight down but she would probably try to kill me with her lavender floor cleaner.
The Blonde is making her own blind study!!
She is perfect for my study!!
I am already down from 132 to 129 in 3 days but I am someone who can follow a diet. I am not nibbling like I usually do.
Yesterday, I deviated the diet protocol with a banana (not on the list) and 4 breaded shrimp ( breaded is a serious no-no for me in general)but I cut out a helping of vegetables to equal it out.
See, you can be a tiny bit bad but it did effect the 1 lbs a day loss. I only lost ounces yesterday.
Anyhoo,
Back to my Guinea pig. On her first day of dieting, low and behold...substitutions in the form of blueberries with cream. Cream is not on the list. I will excuse the blueberries because they actually have less sugar than an apple and its a great anti-oxidant fruit.
I am fairly certain my results will be successful. I am fairly confident ma-me will be a living testament to what not to do on a diet protocol...
If the drops only work to motivate someone and keep them conscious about turning to a healthier nutritional lifestyle...its worth it.
But seriously, I do not feel as hungry as before. And I am always hungry.
I am a perpetual fridge door opener every time I pass the kitchen.
If and when i build a home...the kitchen will be around thhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gife pool in the pool house and unattached to my living quarters.
I tried painting the walls baby blue which some book suggested help curb appetite. It did nothing but make the kitchen look like a baby boy's room.
So, Ma-Me's BMI is 127. I would put her weight down but she would probably try to kill me with her lavender floor cleaner.
The Blonde is making her own blind study!!
7.08.2011
How Pretty Humans Are Underneath
at least, the physical aspect. I know a lot of butt ugly down under the epidermis but this blog is not about the haters.
This is a rotating picture (compliments of wikipedia) of a fingertip. The pretty little waves are the different layers of fat underneath the skin.
I discovered this photo when I began researching the HCG product I am trying and if you look to your left selling as well.
Its not enough to take someone's word that a product works. I have to try it for myself. And although I do not need to loose weight, I am a bit obsessed about the subject and like every other femme would like to be five pounds thinner than I am.
And of course, Like most femm-a-bods, when I loose the five pounds, I will want to loose five more.
I have taken HCG for about five days. The first 3 days I was hungry and cranky. I blame the colon cleanse on the cranky bit but oddly enough I am not so irritated (with exception of Augusto -- still wickedly chapped at him) and I...
and hold on to this shocker...
Have not been interested in wine lately.
I know...
Messing with my vino habit is a huge drawback as far as I am concerned but I am hoping that instinct will kick in and my happy vino time will come back so I can enjoy my American Spirit (no additives does not mean a safer cigarette--whatever, es it does) the porch when the moon hits again.
OK
so the HCG drops I take has curbed my appetite...not just for wine and puffery but for food, in general, as well...
I think I ate an egg and a plum today...still not hungry.
Its only been five days and so let's see if the noshing comes back with the vino.
If its a bogus product, I will let my readers know.
I wont stop working for the company because I like the fact they do use real product without fillers, it pays well, I work from home, and I make my own hours.
And if anyone has been paying attention to this blog..you know how desperately I need a job that can fit around school and afford me some stress free study time.
Half the battle is not having the urge to eat.
The Blonde is concentrating on her inside!
7.07.2011
Infedelity Keeps Us Together
The recent New York Times magazine article about the praises of infidelity to keep a marriage alive leaves me out of the 'US' in the title.
I am not married. I am the single chick who men in relationships try to get with to keep their 'real' commitment to the other woman in tact.
Mother F$#@%!!!!!
I can't tell you how this article struck a debacle in my chord!
Not because I was reading it as a married person, of which I might be more sympathetic, and even more so, I would be all for pandering the help of some safe girl for my hubby if I was not in the mood for sex for half a century or so...
As long as he provdes for me a wonderful life...I would provde him with the same.
Just don't put it in my face and let me be the main love and...
But I am not the wife that is taken care of.
I am the girl that Augusto thinks should take care of him while he takes care of his wife.
Yes, Augusto is married and its not a problem as long as we stick to tennis and biking and our friday night happy hour.
Going to Miami was not a problem. I treated him like my gorgeous gay. I had my own room and I was with a gorgeous hunk to flutter around the beach with and still free to mingle with other men!!
BUT!
Augusto just moved back to Austin and wants to pick up at the beginning of the realtionship when he was seperated or divorced or whatever lie I was gullible enough to believe 6 years ago.
I started this blog because of this sucubine jerk and its taken me years to just be alright with him as a freind but now...
I have had all I can take from his whining to wheel be back into a relationship that is not a realtionship worth having.
I am single, going to law school, and still pretty fucking cute so why on earth would I consider going to a school, not based on its merit, but rather its vicinity to an easy love nest (which I am paying for) for this turd extrodinaire?!
Sorry Augsuto,
I am headed to where the single men roam free around the campus that is in the top 5 of law schools in Texas.
After chewing his ass out for even suggesting such bologne...
This Blonde is on a hunger strike!!
I am not married. I am the single chick who men in relationships try to get with to keep their 'real' commitment to the other woman in tact.
Mother F$#@%!!!!!
I can't tell you how this article struck a debacle in my chord!
Not because I was reading it as a married person, of which I might be more sympathetic, and even more so, I would be all for pandering the help of some safe girl for my hubby if I was not in the mood for sex for half a century or so...
As long as he provdes for me a wonderful life...I would provde him with the same.
Just don't put it in my face and let me be the main love and...
But I am not the wife that is taken care of.
I am the girl that Augusto thinks should take care of him while he takes care of his wife.
Yes, Augusto is married and its not a problem as long as we stick to tennis and biking and our friday night happy hour.
Going to Miami was not a problem. I treated him like my gorgeous gay. I had my own room and I was with a gorgeous hunk to flutter around the beach with and still free to mingle with other men!!
BUT!
Augusto just moved back to Austin and wants to pick up at the beginning of the realtionship when he was seperated or divorced or whatever lie I was gullible enough to believe 6 years ago.
I started this blog because of this sucubine jerk and its taken me years to just be alright with him as a freind but now...
I have had all I can take from his whining to wheel be back into a relationship that is not a realtionship worth having.
I am single, going to law school, and still pretty fucking cute so why on earth would I consider going to a school, not based on its merit, but rather its vicinity to an easy love nest (which I am paying for) for this turd extrodinaire?!
Sorry Augsuto,
I am headed to where the single men roam free around the campus that is in the top 5 of law schools in Texas.
After chewing his ass out for even suggesting such bologne...
This Blonde is on a hunger strike!!
6.24.2011
GED
The following questions were set in last year's GED examination
These are genuine answers!!
BUT WHAT IS MOST CONCERNING TO ME IS THE IDIOTS WHO CAME UP WITH THE QUESTIONS!!!
Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists
Q. How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire
Q. What causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now , there is little hope)
Q.. What happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow
Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie
Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
A. Nearby
Q. What is the most common form of birth control
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor.
Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport.
Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas
Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning
A. Hands that judicious (do dishes) can be soft as your face.
Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight
Q. What is a turbine?
A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head
And why did the Blonde waste her time in school?
These are genuine answers!!
BUT WHAT IS MOST CONCERNING TO ME IS THE IDIOTS WHO CAME UP WITH THE QUESTIONS!!!
Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists
Q. How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire
Q. What causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now , there is little hope)
Q.. What happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow
Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie
Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
A. Nearby
Q. What is the most common form of birth control
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor.
Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport.
Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas
Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning
A. Hands that judicious (do dishes) can be soft as your face.
Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight
Q. What is a turbine?
A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head
And why did the Blonde waste her time in school?
I am pre-Legally Blonde
Who is headed to law school?
The Blonde is!!
I am formally accepted to Baylor and still waiting to hear from SMU but Baylor is a litigation law school and who better to argue out her past aggressions on unsuspecting jurors?
I am!!
The whole world has shifted today. I no longer feel like I am in limbo and its not because the Catholic church decided to do away with it.
Its because my life is moving in a forward motion. Yes, I still have trouble with finances this summer but if I can hold out just two more months...I am still not going to be golden but I will have a bit of worth with grants and scholarships and with a little bit a faith...a part time job in a law firm in Waco.
Waco...I know its bubbaville but my car will blend much better in Waco than Dallas.
I don;t want to live in a rich person's world being poor. I feel more comfortable playing an average Jess in a rural town where I can rent a small farm shack and have room for art, sewing, studying, and yes...even maybe a mini dairy cow to babysit my obnoxious cats.
Fate brought me this opportunity just as much as I have worked for it. I am going where the Gods lead me and if its in the middle of bum fucked Egypt...
I will take it.
I will gladly go where I was never willing to go before and its exciting and its scarey and I am finally brave enough to meet the challenge.
The excitement will soon wear off like the Miami fun did but at least now, I know I am headed somewhere.
I have a road map.
Its been carved out before I was born, I just never followed it. I made the mistake of trying to change things but I really do believe that my life was cast and my only failure was refusing to see it.
This time, the Blonde is following her map!!
The Blonde is!!
I am formally accepted to Baylor and still waiting to hear from SMU but Baylor is a litigation law school and who better to argue out her past aggressions on unsuspecting jurors?
I am!!
The whole world has shifted today. I no longer feel like I am in limbo and its not because the Catholic church decided to do away with it.
Its because my life is moving in a forward motion. Yes, I still have trouble with finances this summer but if I can hold out just two more months...I am still not going to be golden but I will have a bit of worth with grants and scholarships and with a little bit a faith...a part time job in a law firm in Waco.
Waco...I know its bubbaville but my car will blend much better in Waco than Dallas.
I don;t want to live in a rich person's world being poor. I feel more comfortable playing an average Jess in a rural town where I can rent a small farm shack and have room for art, sewing, studying, and yes...even maybe a mini dairy cow to babysit my obnoxious cats.
Fate brought me this opportunity just as much as I have worked for it. I am going where the Gods lead me and if its in the middle of bum fucked Egypt...
I will take it.
I will gladly go where I was never willing to go before and its exciting and its scarey and I am finally brave enough to meet the challenge.
The excitement will soon wear off like the Miami fun did but at least now, I know I am headed somewhere.
I have a road map.
Its been carved out before I was born, I just never followed it. I made the mistake of trying to change things but I really do believe that my life was cast and my only failure was refusing to see it.
This time, the Blonde is following her map!!
6.23.2011
Blonde Moment #...
I lost count!
So I had a blonde moment yesterday. Boo and I were coming home from the store and he left the wiondow down in my car. I went to get in and turn the key to put the window up.
"What are you doing?"
"I am putting the window up."
"Why don't you just put the key in the door and turn it until the window goes up?"
"My car doesn't do that."
"Oh my Gah, Mother how long have you been driving the car?"
"A long freakin time."
"Turn the key until it locks and hold it. Seriously?!" As he continues to shake his head and rub his eyes in dismay.
So I took the key out of the ingnition without rolling up the window. I got out of the car, shut the door, placed the key in the lock, twisted the key, and held it for a few seconds.
Low and behold...the angels appeared and rolled up my window from the outside of the door.
I wonder what else my car can do?
Uhh, big duh for the blonde!!
So I had a blonde moment yesterday. Boo and I were coming home from the store and he left the wiondow down in my car. I went to get in and turn the key to put the window up.
"What are you doing?"
"I am putting the window up."
"Why don't you just put the key in the door and turn it until the window goes up?"
"My car doesn't do that."
"Oh my Gah, Mother how long have you been driving the car?"
"A long freakin time."
"Turn the key until it locks and hold it. Seriously?!" As he continues to shake his head and rub his eyes in dismay.
So I took the key out of the ingnition without rolling up the window. I got out of the car, shut the door, placed the key in the lock, twisted the key, and held it for a few seconds.
Low and behold...the angels appeared and rolled up my window from the outside of the door.
I wonder what else my car can do?
Uhh, big duh for the blonde!!
6.19.2011
My Therapy
This blog is my therapy. I am pretty sure not many people read it. If I got a high view rate, I assume its the videos from youtube that account for the numbers.
And its alright. If no one read this blog, I would still be fine. To me, this blog is just a way to air my thoughts and feelings since I have no one to vent to.
Today, Babs called to wish Big D a Happy F day and I could feel the coldness seeping through the phone. I should not have answered since its the family phone.
I assume she heard earfuls from others in the family and she was guarding herself from another earful attack.
What bothers me most, is that in all the years we have been so distant, we have shared maybe only 3 to 6 phone call conversations a year and not one of them was ever about others in the family.
Am I crazy?
Does my family really see me as something horrible?
Am I so horrible?
I know I am in an unhappy place but I don't spread my heartache around.
I sit in my room alone.
I don't date, I don't see freinds, and I mind my own business.
I don't backstab, gossip, or try to pretend to be the better person by manipulation of facts, events, and telling the story first.
I think the most devastating thing to me is that I see a better person in me than my family ever did...and fighting my way out of that scape has been a long, hard, and tragic road for me.
Letting go of them is the first step in realizing that I am a good person and deserve good things.
I am better than the sum of what they think I am.
The Blonde sees herself with better highlights.
And its alright. If no one read this blog, I would still be fine. To me, this blog is just a way to air my thoughts and feelings since I have no one to vent to.
Today, Babs called to wish Big D a Happy F day and I could feel the coldness seeping through the phone. I should not have answered since its the family phone.
I assume she heard earfuls from others in the family and she was guarding herself from another earful attack.
What bothers me most, is that in all the years we have been so distant, we have shared maybe only 3 to 6 phone call conversations a year and not one of them was ever about others in the family.
Am I crazy?
Does my family really see me as something horrible?
Am I so horrible?
I know I am in an unhappy place but I don't spread my heartache around.
I sit in my room alone.
I don't date, I don't see freinds, and I mind my own business.
I don't backstab, gossip, or try to pretend to be the better person by manipulation of facts, events, and telling the story first.
I think the most devastating thing to me is that I see a better person in me than my family ever did...and fighting my way out of that scape has been a long, hard, and tragic road for me.
Letting go of them is the first step in realizing that I am a good person and deserve good things.
I am better than the sum of what they think I am.
The Blonde sees herself with better highlights.
Raising My Glass to Done
I need to change the headliner of my tags for blinded by blonde since I no longer date online, although I do have stories I can continue to tell but why?
The stories after awhile become stale and unfunny. The sad state of online dating is not funny..its simply sad. I think its especially sad for the lonely people who get caught up in looking for someone so desperately that they will let people that do not deserve them, come in and piece by piece destroy a little bit of their faith in finding someone all too perfect for them.
They will settle for anything rather than nothing.
Look at Raine and Augusto...trying to sell me on less than a life because they want more of one. They sit their and down on me about relationships and wanting freedom to play the field while being in relationships.
Really what they are saying is; they have settled for someone that looks perfect on the outside but on the passion side they need extra women on the side to fulfill what the settlement didn't.
I adore these guys but I do think their justification is a little screwey and I am not the extra rose frosting that will help them complete their cake.
I would rather be alone than settle for someone I do not find perfect for me. I do not mean perfect in the sense of perfection but simply someone that fits perfectly with me. Someone who isn't so perfect that I won't feel less perfect.
When I wrote about the love of men that did not love me back..its more complex than that. The natal chart explains why I can't attain the men I want but also the complexity of this love I have is really manifested from an idea of what I think my life should be and who should fit in it.
I am no longer looking for it but forever will I hold out for it. And if I end up alone...so be it.
Let's face it, its been 6 years...which if you count...I join for one month a year, find a man, see how it works for a year and than when it did not work out the way I had hoped, I go online for a month and bingo starts all over again...so technically its only been 6 months of dating in real time but still...
I am tired of looking...done...finito...ova!!!!
So say hello to the new official cat lady...
the spinster sister...
the Lonely Hearts Club newest band member...
The Blonde won't raise the date ceiling!
The stories after awhile become stale and unfunny. The sad state of online dating is not funny..its simply sad. I think its especially sad for the lonely people who get caught up in looking for someone so desperately that they will let people that do not deserve them, come in and piece by piece destroy a little bit of their faith in finding someone all too perfect for them.
They will settle for anything rather than nothing.
Look at Raine and Augusto...trying to sell me on less than a life because they want more of one. They sit their and down on me about relationships and wanting freedom to play the field while being in relationships.
Really what they are saying is; they have settled for someone that looks perfect on the outside but on the passion side they need extra women on the side to fulfill what the settlement didn't.
I adore these guys but I do think their justification is a little screwey and I am not the extra rose frosting that will help them complete their cake.
I would rather be alone than settle for someone I do not find perfect for me. I do not mean perfect in the sense of perfection but simply someone that fits perfectly with me. Someone who isn't so perfect that I won't feel less perfect.
When I wrote about the love of men that did not love me back..its more complex than that. The natal chart explains why I can't attain the men I want but also the complexity of this love I have is really manifested from an idea of what I think my life should be and who should fit in it.
I am no longer looking for it but forever will I hold out for it. And if I end up alone...so be it.
Let's face it, its been 6 years...which if you count...I join for one month a year, find a man, see how it works for a year and than when it did not work out the way I had hoped, I go online for a month and bingo starts all over again...so technically its only been 6 months of dating in real time but still...
I am tired of looking...done...finito...ova!!!!
So say hello to the new official cat lady...
the spinster sister...
the Lonely Hearts Club newest band member...
The Blonde won't raise the date ceiling!
6.17.2011
Love has No Boundaries
but love should not be built by boundaries either.
I was thinking today about love. The love family thinks they have for each other and how that kind of love is built out of some form of duty they feel. Just because someone is related to someone else does not mean that they must love them.
I think the duty to love can cause more harm than good.
Aside from family love, there is the love we feel for people we meet along our journey; I always wonder why I feel more love toward some than others.
I would like to share a few of my loves....
I love Raine. I miss his smile, his demeanor, his sweet way. I love him and I don't need to be a part of his life to feel that way. I just love him and hope he is happy.
I love Jackson. Funny I know. I only went on a few coffee dates and was rejected for another woman but I feel love for him. I hope the woman he decided to be with is all he ever wanted and I hope he is happy.
I love MM. I have always loved him from the very first time I saw him so many years ago. I hope he is happy and finds the love he looks for.
I have loved a handful of men but they did not love me. Its not their fault any more than its my fault that I fell in love with them.
Love is so intangible, it really is not connected to emotion or feelings.
Love is something given to us from a dying star thousands of years ago. Those who were born from that star will always be connected in some form of love to those that also have that star inside of them.
To explain love is to know physics. You have to understand that from the beginning of time when the stars exploded and died, they gave each and every one of us a bit of their sparkle. Some shine more than others and some have more of one star in them than another and in that little bit of sparkle comes a connection we can not explain without the help of science and physics.
I do not dismiss the notion of a higher power.
I pray to God. I cross my heart in the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost...but I also say thanks to Mother Earth and believe in pagan history before Christianity brutally denied them their faith.
I believe beyond God that physics plays a part in our lives from inception of earth to the death of our world.
I have connected and loved men for no explainable reason...
I will always love the men that I have fallen for and I need not their love back ...I just hold them in my heart and wish them well.
And to Augusto... my soul mate, my perpetual dating partner, my equal panty partner....may one day, I find someone of my own that can share their love with me like you have shared with me.
I bless my lucky stars every day that I have felt love; whether it was returned or not is not the point. The point is, I can love and I can look beyond the status quo's belief; beyond the box they created to conform love as they see fit.
I see love for what it is...an entity that will never conform to anything we know or are willing to really understand with the use of our 10% brain utility.
Yes, I would love to marry someone but not under anyone's written moral code other than my own.
The Blonde is not blinde.
I was thinking today about love. The love family thinks they have for each other and how that kind of love is built out of some form of duty they feel. Just because someone is related to someone else does not mean that they must love them.
I think the duty to love can cause more harm than good.
Aside from family love, there is the love we feel for people we meet along our journey; I always wonder why I feel more love toward some than others.
I would like to share a few of my loves....
I love Raine. I miss his smile, his demeanor, his sweet way. I love him and I don't need to be a part of his life to feel that way. I just love him and hope he is happy.
I love Jackson. Funny I know. I only went on a few coffee dates and was rejected for another woman but I feel love for him. I hope the woman he decided to be with is all he ever wanted and I hope he is happy.
I love MM. I have always loved him from the very first time I saw him so many years ago. I hope he is happy and finds the love he looks for.
I have loved a handful of men but they did not love me. Its not their fault any more than its my fault that I fell in love with them.
Love is so intangible, it really is not connected to emotion or feelings.
Love is something given to us from a dying star thousands of years ago. Those who were born from that star will always be connected in some form of love to those that also have that star inside of them.
To explain love is to know physics. You have to understand that from the beginning of time when the stars exploded and died, they gave each and every one of us a bit of their sparkle. Some shine more than others and some have more of one star in them than another and in that little bit of sparkle comes a connection we can not explain without the help of science and physics.
I do not dismiss the notion of a higher power.
I pray to God. I cross my heart in the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost...but I also say thanks to Mother Earth and believe in pagan history before Christianity brutally denied them their faith.
I believe beyond God that physics plays a part in our lives from inception of earth to the death of our world.
I have connected and loved men for no explainable reason...
I will always love the men that I have fallen for and I need not their love back ...I just hold them in my heart and wish them well.
And to Augusto... my soul mate, my perpetual dating partner, my equal panty partner....may one day, I find someone of my own that can share their love with me like you have shared with me.
I bless my lucky stars every day that I have felt love; whether it was returned or not is not the point. The point is, I can love and I can look beyond the status quo's belief; beyond the box they created to conform love as they see fit.
I see love for what it is...an entity that will never conform to anything we know or are willing to really understand with the use of our 10% brain utility.
Yes, I would love to marry someone but not under anyone's written moral code other than my own.
The Blonde is not blinde.
Animal Smarts
...they don't hang out with their kin. They make babies and forge families and everyone goes on their sweet little way.
Animals don't give unwanted advice, they don't harbor anger for 20 years, and they don't fight over antique typewriters.
But just to be clear...the typewriter goes to me..I don't care what story a certain someone remembers. I wrote my very first movie script on that typewriter. Its in my chest still bound by the baby blue ribbon and covered with a little drawing I made for it.
But feel free to sticky your name over everything else!
Animals don't give you lip about drinking out of a carton. As a matter of fact, I think an animal would be impressed with carton drinking because its eco-friendly since you aren't wasting water to clean a cup a couple of times a day.
I don't know why there is a saying that 'people some times act like animals' since that would be an insult to the animals.
I am not the person some people think I am and I will never be able to change their reality of me but I will tell you this. If the perception you have of me is from 20 years ago, than your reality of me today is askew but who am I to change the vision of your world..
Keep what ever scenery of me you like..paint me red with flames, sharp teeth, and stiletto heels..
rewind in your mind a new tape of what I said and year after year the words can evolve into something so much darker...
Twist and turn that memory of me until you no longer see your sister as a friend but as an enemy on an egg field.
Who needs reality when you can fabricate a web of pettiness into a fantastical film strip that replays in your mind telling yourself how much better you are than me.
If that is what you need to be happy than please be my guest. I won't be around to prove you wrong.
Maybe I do act like an animal....I rather wish family would go away on its own and leave me to me...
The Blonde is not a lion but a Leo!
Animals don't give unwanted advice, they don't harbor anger for 20 years, and they don't fight over antique typewriters.
But just to be clear...the typewriter goes to me..I don't care what story a certain someone remembers. I wrote my very first movie script on that typewriter. Its in my chest still bound by the baby blue ribbon and covered with a little drawing I made for it.
But feel free to sticky your name over everything else!
Animals don't give you lip about drinking out of a carton. As a matter of fact, I think an animal would be impressed with carton drinking because its eco-friendly since you aren't wasting water to clean a cup a couple of times a day.
I don't know why there is a saying that 'people some times act like animals' since that would be an insult to the animals.
I am not the person some people think I am and I will never be able to change their reality of me but I will tell you this. If the perception you have of me is from 20 years ago, than your reality of me today is askew but who am I to change the vision of your world..
Keep what ever scenery of me you like..paint me red with flames, sharp teeth, and stiletto heels..
rewind in your mind a new tape of what I said and year after year the words can evolve into something so much darker...
Twist and turn that memory of me until you no longer see your sister as a friend but as an enemy on an egg field.
Who needs reality when you can fabricate a web of pettiness into a fantastical film strip that replays in your mind telling yourself how much better you are than me.
If that is what you need to be happy than please be my guest. I won't be around to prove you wrong.
Maybe I do act like an animal....I rather wish family would go away on its own and leave me to me...
The Blonde is not a lion but a Leo!
6.14.2011
Miami, Baby!
If not for the puerto rican 'happy hour' scam throughout Miami, it would have been perfect...
6.07.2011
Shula Rest Stop
So I am in Miami Lakes at the Don Shula Golf resort. Its not the hip Miami hotel i stayed at last time I browsed through Miami but its nice. Its actually exceptional for the 99$ prioce tag with an upgrade to a balcony and pool view.
Lots of chubby checkers in this neck of the woods which is wxcellent for my body image. I am rocking the hottest and youngest body in this tiny part of town..
Augusto and I had dinner at the hotel steakhouse and the waiter was trying to upsell everything. Its a shame he wwasted on the food service. he should be in computer sales.
Everything he suggested had the highest price tag. He tried to push a $16 glass of Merlot from Cali on me and I was not going for it until he said its half proce for happy hour.
Of course, after I ordered the second glass, he informed me that the mamagement changed the rules about happy hour at the very last minute and the merlot was full price.
Seriously dude, I know I am blonde but I am not an idiot. I could have argued the point with a multitude of reasons that would make his head spin but I was to tired to get my way...
Besides, if he is so hard up for the tip padding...so be it..its just the last time he will see us in the restaurant.
Waiter: " Good evening, tonight we have on the menu the Screw You special. Would you like that medium or well-done?"
Me: "Well, I am exhausted and I do look like someone you can take advantage of easily, so let't have the well-done jack ass."
Well, I am off to the pool to sit next to those beyond the X-gen and skinny challenged.
The Blonde is in chill mode!
Lots of chubby checkers in this neck of the woods which is wxcellent for my body image. I am rocking the hottest and youngest body in this tiny part of town..
Augusto and I had dinner at the hotel steakhouse and the waiter was trying to upsell everything. Its a shame he wwasted on the food service. he should be in computer sales.
Everything he suggested had the highest price tag. He tried to push a $16 glass of Merlot from Cali on me and I was not going for it until he said its half proce for happy hour.
Of course, after I ordered the second glass, he informed me that the mamagement changed the rules about happy hour at the very last minute and the merlot was full price.
Seriously dude, I know I am blonde but I am not an idiot. I could have argued the point with a multitude of reasons that would make his head spin but I was to tired to get my way...
Besides, if he is so hard up for the tip padding...so be it..its just the last time he will see us in the restaurant.
Waiter: " Good evening, tonight we have on the menu the Screw You special. Would you like that medium or well-done?"
Me: "Well, I am exhausted and I do look like someone you can take advantage of easily, so let't have the well-done jack ass."
Well, I am off to the pool to sit next to those beyond the X-gen and skinny challenged.
The Blonde is in chill mode!
6.04.2011
Baroque, Not Destitute
Just because I am living off of financial fumes doesn't mean I can't get out from under it every once in a while to catch some fresh air.
Augusto, the only man left in my repitoire of Xs; he is allowed to remain because he is truly a good freind and he looks like Antonio Banderas.
Since I have some credit on an airline and he has to go to Miami for work, we are co-mingling our resources and rejuvinating in Miami next week.
I need a little fun time away from the femme cave. I have been hunched over laptops and sewing machines for two weeks launching my wears on Etsy. I feel my back stiffening and when IO played tennis yesterday, it felt like Gollum.
I am going to work out half the day and realx the other half. For me this trip is about stretching my muscles and putting my body in top form.
I am sure some drinks will slip in somewhere in the afternoon whikle on the beach watching the sunset. I am way past the club stage in life. Its not that I am too old for the clubs...its the fact that the men are too young for my taste...better to find some slow runners along the beach...
They are easier to catch.
The Blonde is going beach bum!!
Augusto, the only man left in my repitoire of Xs; he is allowed to remain because he is truly a good freind and he looks like Antonio Banderas.
Since I have some credit on an airline and he has to go to Miami for work, we are co-mingling our resources and rejuvinating in Miami next week.
I need a little fun time away from the femme cave. I have been hunched over laptops and sewing machines for two weeks launching my wears on Etsy. I feel my back stiffening and when IO played tennis yesterday, it felt like Gollum.
I am going to work out half the day and realx the other half. For me this trip is about stretching my muscles and putting my body in top form.
I am sure some drinks will slip in somewhere in the afternoon whikle on the beach watching the sunset. I am way past the club stage in life. Its not that I am too old for the clubs...its the fact that the men are too young for my taste...better to find some slow runners along the beach...
They are easier to catch.
The Blonde is going beach bum!!
5.31.2011
The Weekend
...was super fun filled for partiers and boaters and everyone willing to spend the $4 gallon gas to head out to beaches and lakes.
I on the other hand did nothing but hibernate in my room worried about this next round of monthly bills and watch movies avec une boutielle de vino.
I have not been very social lately. I am happy just being alone in my little femme cave.
I have been hit on by men in their late twenties - one at the bank and one at the gas station- and while its a nice feeling to know I still have the looks, it would be nice to get a couple of business cards from men my own age. Looking young and not being young has two drawbacks..online dating where men tend to look for younger women and in public where men think I am much younger than I am.
I am not looking to be with anyone. I am not financially set up to be with anyone right now. I have bills and a future at law school to keep me man free.
I am just too baroque to be social and that is ok because I know I am not the only person struggling these days. Its nice to have company with my monet miserable'.
One day the money will be back and so will the men. Its not like they disappeared during the rapture!!
Chin up to everyone having a tough time with the green.
Look at it like this..
Being at the bottom means only a small bump if you fall!
The Blonde has no time or money for play!!
I on the other hand did nothing but hibernate in my room worried about this next round of monthly bills and watch movies avec une boutielle de vino.
I have not been very social lately. I am happy just being alone in my little femme cave.
I have been hit on by men in their late twenties - one at the bank and one at the gas station- and while its a nice feeling to know I still have the looks, it would be nice to get a couple of business cards from men my own age. Looking young and not being young has two drawbacks..online dating where men tend to look for younger women and in public where men think I am much younger than I am.
I am not looking to be with anyone. I am not financially set up to be with anyone right now. I have bills and a future at law school to keep me man free.
I am just too baroque to be social and that is ok because I know I am not the only person struggling these days. Its nice to have company with my monet miserable'.
One day the money will be back and so will the men. Its not like they disappeared during the rapture!!
Chin up to everyone having a tough time with the green.
Look at it like this..
Being at the bottom means only a small bump if you fall!
The Blonde has no time or money for play!!
5.27.2011
Memorial Day Weekend
There will be pools, boating, and hiking along Bull Creek and Barton Creek for me!!
Everyone be safe this weekend and remember
Don't Drink and Drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink, try to wipe it off your lap and then get pulled over for looking like a drunk sailor playing with your private parts while driving!!
5.18.2011
Bad Professor, Bad, bad, bad...
So one of my professors got arrested in a sting operation for soliciting 14 year old girls off of social network sites and assaulting them in a park.
I knew the teacher was an odd ball, didn't seem to like bathing very much or wearing clean clothes but I just assumed he was homeless-if you knew what Texas teachers got paid-you would not think twice about some of them being homeless.
I never considered him to be a pedophile although i did notice he liked the petite form in the girls at the front of his class. i guess they =knew something I didn't.
Under these circumstances I feel i should get an A in the class because how do I know he didn't barter (spell check looks for Brett when barter is spelled wrong-what a co-inky-dink; that's the name of the prof) relations with the younger chicks and give them better grades wh8ich would mess up the curve...
Not that I am devastated but I am not above pulling a Dean's conference to get an A out of this news.
I actually pulled a 89 in the class but one little point to settle my mental anguish over the news would help me over come the trauma.
My mind is already turning attorney before I even have the degree. i am always thinking about myself and how I can do better in competition with myself.
If I keep this up- I will end up in a bidding war selling my soul to the red guy with little horns and a tail just like in Devil's advocate..of course I am not a relative so the perks might not extend to me like they did to Keanu.
I hope they throw the book at Professor Pedophile!!
The Blonde can't wait to beat bad in court one day!
I knew the teacher was an odd ball, didn't seem to like bathing very much or wearing clean clothes but I just assumed he was homeless-if you knew what Texas teachers got paid-you would not think twice about some of them being homeless.
I never considered him to be a pedophile although i did notice he liked the petite form in the girls at the front of his class. i guess they =knew something I didn't.
Under these circumstances I feel i should get an A in the class because how do I know he didn't barter (spell check looks for Brett when barter is spelled wrong-what a co-inky-dink; that's the name of the prof) relations with the younger chicks and give them better grades wh8ich would mess up the curve...
Not that I am devastated but I am not above pulling a Dean's conference to get an A out of this news.
I actually pulled a 89 in the class but one little point to settle my mental anguish over the news would help me over come the trauma.
My mind is already turning attorney before I even have the degree. i am always thinking about myself and how I can do better in competition with myself.
If I keep this up- I will end up in a bidding war selling my soul to the red guy with little horns and a tail just like in Devil's advocate..of course I am not a relative so the perks might not extend to me like they did to Keanu.
I hope they throw the book at Professor Pedophile!!
The Blonde can't wait to beat bad in court one day!
5.09.2011
Thank You for Nothing
Sometimes when we have someything to say and no one to listen, we have a song that sings every thing about the nothing we feel!
5.06.2011
Almost an Officer, Always a Gentleman
Only one man deserves a 30 hour road trip from me and its the Boo!!
So its funny that a porker named Albert was shocked that I was not going to move to Columbus Georgia and set up shop with him.
Seriously dude..what did you think would happen?!
Seriously!!
I didn't drive 15 hours to Georgia to pluck some unsuspecting guy out of the hotel bar to play house for a weekend.
I was there to see my son!
I have a plethora of hater texts from this guy simply because he failed to rock my world. I am sure his shtick of being semi-retired and offering cuban cigars to the crowd works on girls in a military town but for those of us who are a little more mature and have seen a lot more of the world...
its just a no go!!
If I end up in Columbus, Georgia...just shoot me now!!
Take out your AK-47 military issue rifle and blow the blonde off my shoulders.
The funny thing about a military town is the machismo that runs rampant and evry guy is trying to bag the new girl in town.
I loved every moment when the 30 something Captains would hit on me and the minute I said I was in town for my son's graduation, they less than politely just up and turned away.
It was great!
I felt like the twenty year old with a baby all over again. Back in the hay-days of my youth guys would hit on me and when I told them I was a single Mom with a baby, they turned a 180 back in the other direction...its nice to see some things don't change!!
Anyhoo,
The thirty hour drive was excruciating but looking back on it..I would do it over again in a heart beat because there will always be one man in my life worth the dump truck supply of coffee and twizzlers I endured on the road.
And its my Boo!!
The military isn't the only thing making great men.
The Blonde salutes single Moms everywhere!!!
5.04.2011
Driving Like a Bat out of Hell
I drove 15 hours with only pit stops for gas to Columbus, GA...
And if you think I am done with pics, no way!!
30 hours on the road leaves a lot of creativity time behind the wheel and multiple chair positions just to make it through the unbearableness of all that road.
By the time I finished the drive I had 23 different seat positions working..the last was the lotus position with my seat back jetted forward and the seat portion pushed to the front of the floor board with my legs crossed in a lotus position driving with cruise control.
My body was a human pretzel twisted and turned to suffer through more hours.
On my way up I was captured by the Louisiana po-po!
My car was profiled by a state trooper in Louisiana-its black and has more than its share of dinks and dents, not to mention the fur coated trunk....it would set off even the laziest of cops at 3 AM in the morn.
I was asked if I was carrying drugs and or illegal aliens. The Texas plate is to blame for that question. My car license, registration, and inspection are all long since been expired but I got off anyway...love southern hospitality...
I think the cop was flirting in the end!!
On my way back to Austin, I was working with one contact, a pack of twizzlers, and beucoup cups of cafe!!
But I made it and I have a few tales to tell...but later..
I haven't been this exhausted since my drive back from San Antonio partying with Collective Soul and one crazy coked up ex-wench friend of mine.
The Blonde is glad to pull the throttle back a bit!!
4.23.2011
Applying Like Crazy
I spent today applying to all the pre-law schools recommended by the American Bar Association. Apparently, they do not agree with the US World News Report rankings of schools.
And I rather work the schools ranked by the Bar association than a magazine that sells ads to universities for a living.
Along with my educational apps for the fall; I spent the rest of the day creating online employment opportunity apps with health food stores near and around my proposed schools.
I don't know why I am so gung ho about working for a health food store but I am.
My intended target and apron wearing fantasy starts at applying to
Sprouts
I am a fanatic about keeping fit and healthy through proper dieting because I am too lazy to exercise and if you eat well, you dont have to bust your balls in a gym.
I am such an obesity snob, it would make sense for me to promote proper eating in a health food store rather than laying my eating rules down to the poor college slob who accidentally chose to sit next to me in class.
I get so aggravated by the sloppy way people take care of their bodies.
The ridiculousness of it all escapes me.
My sisters waited in line for an hour to put 5 pounds on their arse on a cupcake binge. Since this was a rare occurrence and the DC cupcake shop is on television, I can see the entertainment value. And it was super fun with the kiddos..so a little escape to sugarville is great..Bravo..
By the way Pookums...
You can order DC Cupcakes online now that you got the fan fair and the lime lighted shop scratched off your bucket list.
I love cupcakes too and once in a blue moon-my blue moon, not Michelle Obama's blue moon that keeps her arse growing in leaps and bounds-it perfectly alright to indulge in culinary for the pulmonary, a little bit.
But something has to give before the world gets weight heavy and tips a bit.
We think ourselves the best nation in the world not because we have to stand in line for food rations but because we can choose to stand in line to buy a dozen celebrity status cupcakes...
In Texas we have the top 3 cities for fatness and its all thanks to tex-mex which is nothing more than a combination of lard, flour, burger, and chicken cooked 18 different ways with cheese and salsa smothering the top of it.
Throw in a sugary dose of margaritas and its rotundity central in these parts.
I am a terrible fat snob..
A bigot of hugery!!
Chelsea Handler likes these mounds of flesh and fat because they make her look skinnier and prettier standing next to them..
but in reality obesity is costing us more than smoking and it doesn't make anyone look good to promote it!
Put a sin tax on coca-cola and McDonald's and see if people can quit?!!
The Blonde is a little health nut!
And I rather work the schools ranked by the Bar association than a magazine that sells ads to universities for a living.
Along with my educational apps for the fall; I spent the rest of the day creating online employment opportunity apps with health food stores near and around my proposed schools.
I don't know why I am so gung ho about working for a health food store but I am.
My intended target and apron wearing fantasy starts at applying to
Sprouts
I am a fanatic about keeping fit and healthy through proper dieting because I am too lazy to exercise and if you eat well, you dont have to bust your balls in a gym.
I am such an obesity snob, it would make sense for me to promote proper eating in a health food store rather than laying my eating rules down to the poor college slob who accidentally chose to sit next to me in class.
I get so aggravated by the sloppy way people take care of their bodies.
The ridiculousness of it all escapes me.
My sisters waited in line for an hour to put 5 pounds on their arse on a cupcake binge. Since this was a rare occurrence and the DC cupcake shop is on television, I can see the entertainment value. And it was super fun with the kiddos..so a little escape to sugarville is great..Bravo..
By the way Pookums...
You can order DC Cupcakes online now that you got the fan fair and the lime lighted shop scratched off your bucket list.
I love cupcakes too and once in a blue moon-my blue moon, not Michelle Obama's blue moon that keeps her arse growing in leaps and bounds-it perfectly alright to indulge in culinary for the pulmonary, a little bit.
But something has to give before the world gets weight heavy and tips a bit.
We think ourselves the best nation in the world not because we have to stand in line for food rations but because we can choose to stand in line to buy a dozen celebrity status cupcakes...
In Texas we have the top 3 cities for fatness and its all thanks to tex-mex which is nothing more than a combination of lard, flour, burger, and chicken cooked 18 different ways with cheese and salsa smothering the top of it.
Throw in a sugary dose of margaritas and its rotundity central in these parts.
I am a terrible fat snob..
A bigot of hugery!!
Chelsea Handler likes these mounds of flesh and fat because they make her look skinnier and prettier standing next to them..
but in reality obesity is costing us more than smoking and it doesn't make anyone look good to promote it!
Put a sin tax on coca-cola and McDonald's and see if people can quit?!!
The Blonde is a little health nut!
4.20.2011
Two Timers & Teetotalers
Teetotalers- with their fanny packs and guts - aren't the only ones scratched from my list...
I haven't been two timed, at least not that I know of, but there are two men that I feel especially sad for the women that endure their selfish undertaking.
After 6 years of being the other girl, I am doing other men. After years of being the one that helps keep proper relationship in tact, I have whipped out my blonde colored magical carpet and am fleeing to higher ground.
Augusto and Raine have women that they have been in long term relationships with. They apparently love them but not enough love is in their heart to keep their Johnson from poking at a private off base.
Augusto, I have a little more empathy for but Raine...he is just a wolf in Red Riding Hood's cape carying a basket of his ex's injustice on him so he can pander to a passively aggressive skip on women. He likes to interject how wonderful and honest he his being with is lovers but he fails to extend that same honesty with his pseudo betrothed.
He has given her the rules of engagement but as a woman-she is civilian- I am certain his ethics don't reach outside the boundaries of his mid-life crisis and the militarical (its a sniglet-you need to be SNL savvy to understand) belief system that he propagated in his man mind.
How funny men can me?
Raine and Augusto really do believe their massacre of truth becomes a tasty treat of bologna for all to consume.
Its bologna...that is what bologna is..a mesh of non meat -- non truth...
I am not hurt by their indiscretion but I am hurt by the fact, that for awhile, I became complacent to their mediocre bourgeois bologne.
Eat me..you neophytes... you will never have the charm and charisma of a European to carry out your silly rudimentary American affairs for very long.
Your day is coming near...
Woman who are smart and pretty will realize they need to feed on better men before they begin to believe 'they are what they eat'.
Lets all eat, pray, and love in a European way..sans the American men...
Fast food and gluttony have surpassed fine cuisine and good taste in this country.
I am rebelling!!
A Blonde only drinks and eats the best!!
I haven't been two timed, at least not that I know of, but there are two men that I feel especially sad for the women that endure their selfish undertaking.
After 6 years of being the other girl, I am doing other men. After years of being the one that helps keep proper relationship in tact, I have whipped out my blonde colored magical carpet and am fleeing to higher ground.
Augusto and Raine have women that they have been in long term relationships with. They apparently love them but not enough love is in their heart to keep their Johnson from poking at a private off base.
Augusto, I have a little more empathy for but Raine...he is just a wolf in Red Riding Hood's cape carying a basket of his ex's injustice on him so he can pander to a passively aggressive skip on women. He likes to interject how wonderful and honest he his being with is lovers but he fails to extend that same honesty with his pseudo betrothed.
He has given her the rules of engagement but as a woman-she is civilian- I am certain his ethics don't reach outside the boundaries of his mid-life crisis and the militarical (its a sniglet-you need to be SNL savvy to understand) belief system that he propagated in his man mind.
How funny men can me?
Raine and Augusto really do believe their massacre of truth becomes a tasty treat of bologna for all to consume.
Its bologna...that is what bologna is..a mesh of non meat -- non truth...
I am not hurt by their indiscretion but I am hurt by the fact, that for awhile, I became complacent to their mediocre bourgeois bologne.
Eat me..you neophytes... you will never have the charm and charisma of a European to carry out your silly rudimentary American affairs for very long.
Your day is coming near...
Woman who are smart and pretty will realize they need to feed on better men before they begin to believe 'they are what they eat'.
Lets all eat, pray, and love in a European way..sans the American men...
Fast food and gluttony have surpassed fine cuisine and good taste in this country.
I am rebelling!!
A Blonde only drinks and eats the best!!
4.19.2011
Holding Out
I have been holding out in the library now for a week. My finals are coming up and I need to rock on.
I am two weeks shy of finishing out this semester. Just in time too because I am solidly broke. Not just a little broke, I mean down right lint in the handbags and wallets broke.
It will be nice to find some full time work and relax on grades through the summer.
According to the news, jobs are on the rise..let's see if this non-traditional student can find work in a law firm...
I wouldn't mind working in a health food store with kids that have lots of tats and piercings. Wearing jeans to work for the summer appeals to me too.
I actually have 10 years in advertising and producing but I am fairly certain that job door that has been bolted for awhile now.
Besides, who wouldn't aspire to wearing a green apron every day?
I am beyond shame or embarrassment. I rather go to work and earn money for law school on my own than try to shag some old guy for allowance any day of the week.
Besides, I tried that and its totally not worth the boredom and the baggage that comes with these old birds.
Somewhere online -match profiles- I was convinced that X gen girls couldn't get a guy there own age..untrue..there are plenty of men my age and they have a lot less mental cargo than the crypt keepers I have been hanging out with.
An apron and dreadlocks for the summer?!
Better than wearing old dudes around my arm!!
I only have two thought and that is to get through law school and not date another douche for the duration of my time on this planet and I will start by bringing the age bracket down from AARP membership and going with real men that look good on my arm...
The Blonde has a steady grip!
I am two weeks shy of finishing out this semester. Just in time too because I am solidly broke. Not just a little broke, I mean down right lint in the handbags and wallets broke.
It will be nice to find some full time work and relax on grades through the summer.
According to the news, jobs are on the rise..let's see if this non-traditional student can find work in a law firm...
I wouldn't mind working in a health food store with kids that have lots of tats and piercings. Wearing jeans to work for the summer appeals to me too.
I actually have 10 years in advertising and producing but I am fairly certain that job door that has been bolted for awhile now.
Besides, who wouldn't aspire to wearing a green apron every day?
I am beyond shame or embarrassment. I rather go to work and earn money for law school on my own than try to shag some old guy for allowance any day of the week.
Besides, I tried that and its totally not worth the boredom and the baggage that comes with these old birds.
Somewhere online -match profiles- I was convinced that X gen girls couldn't get a guy there own age..untrue..there are plenty of men my age and they have a lot less mental cargo than the crypt keepers I have been hanging out with.
An apron and dreadlocks for the summer?!
Better than wearing old dudes around my arm!!
I only have two thought and that is to get through law school and not date another douche for the duration of my time on this planet and I will start by bringing the age bracket down from AARP membership and going with real men that look good on my arm...
The Blonde has a steady grip!
4.13.2011
Candy Store Dating
That is what online dating is, Its a candy store with too much candy and you keep eating your way through until all the good candy is gone.
But your so addicted to it that you will start sampling the candy you don't like thinking liquorice might turn out tasting like sweet tarts.
Online dating is a pez dispenser.
The dispenser is fun but the candy is the same and it sucks.
Insanity is doing the same thing over expecting different results.
I hate pez, I hate liquorice, and I am sick of eating the crap candy online.
I lasted all of 3 days on MM before deleting my profile.
Get out of the candy store. Go to the park and play, fly a kite, do anything but the same old routine that has never produced a lick of good results.
The Blonde's candy turned sour!
But your so addicted to it that you will start sampling the candy you don't like thinking liquorice might turn out tasting like sweet tarts.
Online dating is a pez dispenser.
The dispenser is fun but the candy is the same and it sucks.
Insanity is doing the same thing over expecting different results.
I hate pez, I hate liquorice, and I am sick of eating the crap candy online.
I lasted all of 3 days on MM before deleting my profile.
Get out of the candy store. Go to the park and play, fly a kite, do anything but the same old routine that has never produced a lick of good results.
The Blonde's candy turned sour!
Oie
Oie is french for goose.
Oie vay is what I say when my Mom asks me to babysit her newest project.
She is raising baby geese for fun before she sends them back to her friends farm.
Its one thing to see my food wrapped in cellophane in the isle next to my wine. But when my food follows me around the yard and tweets at me and sleeps on my lap...suddenly...I am not hungry any more.
I just hope to God the neighborhood associations puts their foot down on baby cows.
I would hate to not wear leather again!!
The Blonde is not going to eat poultry ever again.
My cats, on the other hand, are trying to figure out how to get the grille working as I type.
4.10.2011
To Bang or Not To Bang
that is the question.
Get you mind out of the gutter...
I meant my hair.
First thing a blonde does after done with a man is chop of her goldilocks for a new 'me'.
But I like my hair and the most I am willing to go is with some bangs.
I am in a budget crisis and the only natural thing to do is take a scissor and cut a new look.
A little bit of bangs goes a lot farther than botox on a budget.
Not that I am ready for botox...yet, but give me a few more stressed out months with my scholarship money depleted...and I will need a face lift.
What was I thinking?
Its not like I need more maintenance in my life.
I didn't want to break a tradition
I turned on Dog Days are Over and sang along in the shower as I balded my peeka-boo into a Telly Savalis
Not quite Bali
but when on a budget
A Blonde needs the best bang for her buck!
Get you mind out of the gutter...
I meant my hair.
First thing a blonde does after done with a man is chop of her goldilocks for a new 'me'.
But I like my hair and the most I am willing to go is with some bangs.
I am in a budget crisis and the only natural thing to do is take a scissor and cut a new look.
A little bit of bangs goes a lot farther than botox on a budget.
Not that I am ready for botox...yet, but give me a few more stressed out months with my scholarship money depleted...and I will need a face lift.
What was I thinking?
Its not like I need more maintenance in my life.
I didn't want to break a tradition
I turned on Dog Days are Over and sang along in the shower as I balded my peeka-boo into a Telly Savalis
Not quite Bali
but when on a budget
A Blonde needs the best bang for her buck!
4.09.2011
I Am Winning
and in a real way, not the coked up Charlie way.
I feel better today. I still have money trouble but at least I can work that out.
Exercise is the main ingredient to feeling better.
For normal bouts of being down, you do not need a feel good pill to turn it around.
You need to mentally challenge yourself to get up and get moving.
Even if you hate it, it will help.
And when you feel better, things just seem to turn around for the better.
I actually got hit on by someone my age, super cute, and he is a Jewish dude from Boston
Bonus!!
Jewish men are awesome and if they are from the east coast, even better for me.
I have to replace Raine any way and this looks like a great replacement.
Even if I do not go out with this new attraction, just knowing I am not too old to find someone my own age...made my day.
The Blonde still has hope!
I feel better today. I still have money trouble but at least I can work that out.
Exercise is the main ingredient to feeling better.
For normal bouts of being down, you do not need a feel good pill to turn it around.
You need to mentally challenge yourself to get up and get moving.
Even if you hate it, it will help.
And when you feel better, things just seem to turn around for the better.
I actually got hit on by someone my age, super cute, and he is a Jewish dude from Boston
Bonus!!
Jewish men are awesome and if they are from the east coast, even better for me.
I have to replace Raine any way and this looks like a great replacement.
Even if I do not go out with this new attraction, just knowing I am not too old to find someone my own age...made my day.
The Blonde still has hope!
4.08.2011
Beating the Blues
I could sit here and succumb to sorrow but its stupid to let bad thoughts win over good ones.
I watched Eat, Pray, Love and even though it was cheesy, it did kind of lift my spirits a bit.
Actually, it was just the part with Javier Bardot that did it for me.
And I actually learned something about my life from watching it. While the money situation gets me down, its not what really upsets me.
What upsets me is being alone in this life and realizing men just aren't what they used to be when I was young. They all are a bit self centered and unwilling to fall in love and care for a woman.
Every date I have been on starts with the same verbage, "I already married and took care of someone, I am not going to do that again."
Great!
How would you like me to say on a first date, " I have been nothing but a sex toy for guys and I am not going to do that anymore!!"
Would I get a call back?
Hell no.
And neither are these guys. I am just pissed I wasted me time and one back end of a car on the last two.
They so were not worth my jag looking like a rumpled tuna can.
Anyhoo,
Today I beat the living crap out of the tennis ball and my opponent on the court.
It felt good to hit the ball.
I was dark and moody and didn't want to leave the house but I have to catch those thoughts and beat them out along with the tennis ball.
I have to keep fighting this feeling until passes. Its a mental challenge but so is tennis.
I can't be with a man right now and I am sad to think that I may very well end up alone forever.
I go to school and work from the house...the only way I could meet men is through online dating and there is seriously something wrong with a human catalog. It makes people not invest in someone for the right reasons.
Its a soulless endeavor that only follows money and external beauty.
I just can't stand the thought of selling my soul to another man that really has no interest in anything but finding a companion that doesn't interrupt their life.
Love is not just for the young but it seems as I grow older that it might not ever find me...and that breaks me more than being broke.
So I am feeding the personal kitty...
I am investing in myself....
and although my market share is down right now...
I will pick up and hopefully...
one day...
I might actually be happy again.
The Blonde is just a little worn from the fight!!
I watched Eat, Pray, Love and even though it was cheesy, it did kind of lift my spirits a bit.
Actually, it was just the part with Javier Bardot that did it for me.
And I actually learned something about my life from watching it. While the money situation gets me down, its not what really upsets me.
What upsets me is being alone in this life and realizing men just aren't what they used to be when I was young. They all are a bit self centered and unwilling to fall in love and care for a woman.
Every date I have been on starts with the same verbage, "I already married and took care of someone, I am not going to do that again."
Great!
How would you like me to say on a first date, " I have been nothing but a sex toy for guys and I am not going to do that anymore!!"
Would I get a call back?
Hell no.
And neither are these guys. I am just pissed I wasted me time and one back end of a car on the last two.
They so were not worth my jag looking like a rumpled tuna can.
Anyhoo,
Today I beat the living crap out of the tennis ball and my opponent on the court.
It felt good to hit the ball.
I was dark and moody and didn't want to leave the house but I have to catch those thoughts and beat them out along with the tennis ball.
I have to keep fighting this feeling until passes. Its a mental challenge but so is tennis.
I can't be with a man right now and I am sad to think that I may very well end up alone forever.
I go to school and work from the house...the only way I could meet men is through online dating and there is seriously something wrong with a human catalog. It makes people not invest in someone for the right reasons.
Its a soulless endeavor that only follows money and external beauty.
I just can't stand the thought of selling my soul to another man that really has no interest in anything but finding a companion that doesn't interrupt their life.
Love is not just for the young but it seems as I grow older that it might not ever find me...and that breaks me more than being broke.
So I am feeding the personal kitty...
I am investing in myself....
and although my market share is down right now...
I will pick up and hopefully...
one day...
I might actually be happy again.
The Blonde is just a little worn from the fight!!
4.07.2011
Sludge Day
I am down and rock bottomed out on my thoughts.
After dealing with Capital One and a merchant dispute in which they might find in favor of the deceptive advertising dicks..
After driving by Sandra Bullock and seeing a glimpse of what a wonderful life can be filled with...
After knowing I am late on bills and have to pawn yet another piece of jewelry...
After listening to callers on the radio asking for help becuase they are about to lose everything...
I got hit hard emotionally yesterday...
and pissing off with a bottle of wine seems like the only good way to end a day...
but...
I have to keep moving ahead
This will pass
I am not pissing 2 years of school away...
Who knows if my life is going to get better...
It might just end up that it will suck forever in which case taking my beater car and driving it into the ocean and letting the tides pull me out to sea might be a great option...
One day...
but for now...
The Blonde is treading!!
After dealing with Capital One and a merchant dispute in which they might find in favor of the deceptive advertising dicks..
After driving by Sandra Bullock and seeing a glimpse of what a wonderful life can be filled with...
After knowing I am late on bills and have to pawn yet another piece of jewelry...
After listening to callers on the radio asking for help becuase they are about to lose everything...
I got hit hard emotionally yesterday...
and pissing off with a bottle of wine seems like the only good way to end a day...
but...
I have to keep moving ahead
This will pass
I am not pissing 2 years of school away...
Who knows if my life is going to get better...
It might just end up that it will suck forever in which case taking my beater car and driving it into the ocean and letting the tides pull me out to sea might be a great option...
One day...
but for now...
The Blonde is treading!!
4.06.2011
O-hell-io
Thanks for the fave, you were the only hit, but as you can read or about to begin to read,
The men I have had the unfortunate circumstance of dating have burnt the last bit of anything good I might have had in me.
I am sure you are a great guy but I am no longer a great chick to deal with.
And no offense, but are you kidding?
Me in Ohio?
The women would have me black-balled, tarred, and feathered before I stepped a foot into your house.
Besides,
now
I am just buying time in law school....
How can I possibly be an attorney when I hate the clothes I would have to wear in court...
there is no such thing as a sexy suit...
and even if there were...
My expiration date is marked.
I turned sour!!
The Blonde has no high on anything!
The men I have had the unfortunate circumstance of dating have burnt the last bit of anything good I might have had in me.
I am sure you are a great guy but I am no longer a great chick to deal with.
And no offense, but are you kidding?
Me in Ohio?
The women would have me black-balled, tarred, and feathered before I stepped a foot into your house.
Besides,
now
I am just buying time in law school....
How can I possibly be an attorney when I hate the clothes I would have to wear in court...
there is no such thing as a sexy suit...
and even if there were...
My expiration date is marked.
I turned sour!!
The Blonde has no high on anything!
Life As I Know It
isn't worth a life at all.
I do believe in reincarnation. After taking physics, you learn that life, a person, is energy and energy does not die. It goes somewhere.
Energy will never be more nor less than what it is...so for everyone that dies, something lives.
I am ready to live another life. This one really has not panned out.
I am playing gout a false facade of school, men, and one day having something.
It is never going to happen.
At my age, I am all but done with hope. I just want to be able to pass on my journals of 30 years so maybe, one day, some one can understand that sometimes, you just can't fix broken.
No matter how hard I laugh and smile and try to work this world out, I just can't do it any more.
Nothing is funny any more, not even the douche bags I date.
Its all just a hopeless comedy that would be better sold when I am gone.
So sit back and enjoy the tragedy and comedy of 30 some odd years of my life.
If I were manic, I could have these journals up in a month but I am just your average moth in the the yellow light taking awhile to burn out.
The Blonde has only so much to live for!
I do believe in reincarnation. After taking physics, you learn that life, a person, is energy and energy does not die. It goes somewhere.
Energy will never be more nor less than what it is...so for everyone that dies, something lives.
I am ready to live another life. This one really has not panned out.
I am playing gout a false facade of school, men, and one day having something.
It is never going to happen.
At my age, I am all but done with hope. I just want to be able to pass on my journals of 30 years so maybe, one day, some one can understand that sometimes, you just can't fix broken.
No matter how hard I laugh and smile and try to work this world out, I just can't do it any more.
Nothing is funny any more, not even the douche bags I date.
Its all just a hopeless comedy that would be better sold when I am gone.
So sit back and enjoy the tragedy and comedy of 30 some odd years of my life.
If I were manic, I could have these journals up in a month but I am just your average moth in the the yellow light taking awhile to burn out.
The Blonde has only so much to live for!
I Am Fuccked
I have been living a long time and nothing seems to improve.
I am done, I am tired, I want to leave, leave, leave....
I didn't have a great start and its not going to be a great ending...
I have only one reason to be here and once he is safe and on his own away from this place...
I can leave with my furry assed jag and go!!
The Blonde is done!!
Yes its a rant on wine but I have had many that you do not see but since I have nothing to lose and nothing to gain in this life, I am not deleting anything any more.
You will get the real to the end!
I am done, I am tired, I want to leave, leave, leave....
I didn't have a great start and its not going to be a great ending...
I have only one reason to be here and once he is safe and on his own away from this place...
I can leave with my furry assed jag and go!!
The Blonde is done!!
Yes its a rant on wine but I have had many that you do not see but since I have nothing to lose and nothing to gain in this life, I am not deleting anything any more.
You will get the real to the end!
4.05.2011
No More Raine
I booted Raine off of Facebook.
Not that is saying much since these days I don't play on FB. I am too much of a social outcast to feel like I belong. Twitter is so much more my style.
Anyhoo...
Back to the Raine. I booted him and everyone else that was a "friend". I love the creativity in his definition of friend. Its basically, a booty call on their cell's Rolodex and when they are feeling a little tickle in their turkey neck below, the fumble for the long distance dial to my phone when he isn't feeling the passion from his steady.
Other than that, I never hear from him.
Probably becuase he is busy with the steady in Cabo.
Which leads me to why I booted him from the blonde realm.
Cabo...a place I have never been invited to. I do not know why since we have been "friends" for six odd years.
Maybe his girlfriend wont think I am really a "friend"?
I suspect she is not familiar with Raine's specific definition of "friend" in the femme form.
Anyhoo...
I didn't mind before going to New York for a few days and hanging out as a "friend" and I probably would have continued to do that until law school started but Raine made a fatal error.
He came to Austin and booked a one night in $99 Hampton Inn downtown as if I was some cheap hooker for the night!
He gets the gold plated douche award for this play.
This is where pissed off comes into action.
Don't come to my town, rent a cheap hotel downtown and expect me to be happy about your visit when I know your girlfriend "with an understanding" is getting caviar, Cabo and a condo...
on the beach!!!
I am so turned off by that one act, that when I went to kiss him good-bye as I tried to knock him to the airport curve.... my skin felt like crawling out from under my blonde.
Uckkk....so done!
A blonde is never going to allow that behavior more than once and consider it a faux pas. Second chances are never an option for this kind of hustle.
Like my natal chart says...
I hold onto men way too long and I think its time to start spring cleaning.
No more Raine to piss on my NY or Austin garden.
The Blonde is not a wet rag!
Not that is saying much since these days I don't play on FB. I am too much of a social outcast to feel like I belong. Twitter is so much more my style.
Anyhoo...
Back to the Raine. I booted him and everyone else that was a "friend". I love the creativity in his definition of friend. Its basically, a booty call on their cell's Rolodex and when they are feeling a little tickle in their turkey neck below, the fumble for the long distance dial to my phone when he isn't feeling the passion from his steady.
Other than that, I never hear from him.
Probably becuase he is busy with the steady in Cabo.
Which leads me to why I booted him from the blonde realm.
Cabo...a place I have never been invited to. I do not know why since we have been "friends" for six odd years.
Maybe his girlfriend wont think I am really a "friend"?
I suspect she is not familiar with Raine's specific definition of "friend" in the femme form.
Anyhoo...
I didn't mind before going to New York for a few days and hanging out as a "friend" and I probably would have continued to do that until law school started but Raine made a fatal error.
He came to Austin and booked a one night in $99 Hampton Inn downtown as if I was some cheap hooker for the night!
He gets the gold plated douche award for this play.
This is where pissed off comes into action.
Don't come to my town, rent a cheap hotel downtown and expect me to be happy about your visit when I know your girlfriend "with an understanding" is getting caviar, Cabo and a condo...
on the beach!!!
I am so turned off by that one act, that when I went to kiss him good-bye as I tried to knock him to the airport curve.... my skin felt like crawling out from under my blonde.
Uckkk....so done!
A blonde is never going to allow that behavior more than once and consider it a faux pas. Second chances are never an option for this kind of hustle.
Like my natal chart says...
I hold onto men way too long and I think its time to start spring cleaning.
No more Raine to piss on my NY or Austin garden.
The Blonde is not a wet rag!
4.03.2011
Going for the Zodiac
Everyone who has had a tough go at relationships is always looking for a better way to pick and choose the next one.
I am no different. I have tried going in the exact opposite direction of what I once picked, I tired praying, and even contemplated follow9ng in the Captain's foot steps and hit the past life theory but I have enough in this life.
I do not need to add a few more of my lives to the stress bowl.
Oc course its only natural that I am going to try astrology to pick a new partner. You can get your natal chart online just by adding your birthday and exact time of birth. Its surprisingly accurate in describing who I am...good and bad.
And, if it can give me a clear written objective view of my personality, why not the next mate?
It can't possibly do any worse than I have done.
No harm, no foul, just an interesting new thing to try.
I do find a little hypocrisy in this horoscope thing. While its alright for a blonde chick to play around with this as a novelty, it would be a little creepy to find a guy who was into astrology.
I like that.
I finally found a double standard where it applies to this side of the femme line.
Atrology: women can and the men I date... can't!!
The Blonde is checking the signs!!
I am no different. I have tried going in the exact opposite direction of what I once picked, I tired praying, and even contemplated follow9ng in the Captain's foot steps and hit the past life theory but I have enough in this life.
I do not need to add a few more of my lives to the stress bowl.
Oc course its only natural that I am going to try astrology to pick a new partner. You can get your natal chart online just by adding your birthday and exact time of birth. Its surprisingly accurate in describing who I am...good and bad.
And, if it can give me a clear written objective view of my personality, why not the next mate?
It can't possibly do any worse than I have done.
No harm, no foul, just an interesting new thing to try.
I do find a little hypocrisy in this horoscope thing. While its alright for a blonde chick to play around with this as a novelty, it would be a little creepy to find a guy who was into astrology.
I like that.
I finally found a double standard where it applies to this side of the femme line.
Atrology: women can and the men I date... can't!!
The Blonde is checking the signs!!
4.02.2011
When your Venus is in Virgo
you express love by doing things for, and fussing over, your loved one. You notice little things about your partner, make mental notes of their likes and dislikes (this may sound contrived, but it's not—it's simply the way you're wired!), and genuinely try to help your lover in practical ways. You listen to what your lover has to say, and you have something sensible and intelligent to say in response! In fact, you are great at communicating about your relationship.
One dilemma that can easily happen with this position: Your partner doesn't always know how to please you. You might have a simple answer, but he/she may still wonder. You see all of the details of your relationship. You worry about its viability, and tend to the practical details of partnership. These are important contributions to the relationship, but because they lack glamour, your partner may not always appreciate you. You are not the most romantic partner, and your tastes are rather simple (although, as mentioned before, it is hard for others to see that simplicity because you may have a habit of fussing). Can't see the forest for the trees? Your partner might accuse you of this, and it may be true. You will benefit from sitting back and infusing yourself with some faith in the big picture, once in a while. But, you are needed! And there are partners who will see that. You work hard at making yourself indispensable in your partner's life. Generally, you don't throw yourself into love affairs too readily. This does not mean you are chaste, like the Virgo of yore. Some Venus in Virgo natives can even be promiscuous. But when it comes to gooey romance, where lovers bare all, you are rather selective and self-contained. You are a very sensual being who wants to feel safe before giving yourself to another. Venus in Virgo has a reputation for being critical. This does happen, but it generally is a symptom of insecurity. You can't help but see the failings and the holes in any partnership, and you can sometimes be quite reticent about entering a partnership. Generally, though, you will see what's wrong with a person at the outset of a relationship when it doesn't feel safe to you as yet. It's a defense mechanism more than anything! Your own insecurities can propel you to see faults and problems in your partner. Once you feel safe, however, you are not quite the fussbudget Venus in Virgo is made out to be. You value effort put into a relationship (in fact, for many with this position, effort from their partner is at the top of their list).
If I could just hand this out on a first date, it would save a lot of remorse!!
The Blonde is a Venus Goddess!!
When your Venus is in Virgo
you express love by doing things for, and fussing over, your loved one. You notice little things about your partner, make mental notes of their likes and dislikes (this may sound contrived, but it's not—it's simply the way you're wired!), and genuinely try to help your lover in practical ways. You listen to what your lover has to say, and you have something sensible and intelligent to say in response! In fact, you are great at communicating about your relationship.
One dilemma that can easily happen with this position: Your partner doesn't always know how to please you. You might have a simple answer, but he/she may still wonder. You see all of the details of your relationship. You worry about its viability, and tend to the practical details of partnership. These are important contributions to the relationship, but because they lack glamour, your partner may not always appreciate you. You are not the most romantic partner, and your tastes are rather simple (although, as mentioned before, it is hard for others to see that simplicity because you may have a habit of fussing). Can't see the forest for the trees? Your partner might accuse you of this, and it may be true. You will benefit from sitting back and infusing yourself with some faith in the big picture, once in a while. But, you are needed! And there are partners who will see that. You work hard at making yourself indispensable in your partner's life. Generally, you don't throw yourself into love affairs too readily. This does not mean you are chaste, like the Virgo of yore. Some Venus in Virgo natives can even be promiscuous. But when it comes to gooey romance, where lovers bare all, you are rather selective and self-contained. You are a very sensual being who wants to feel safe before giving yourself to another. Venus in Virgo has a reputation for being critical. This does happen, but it generally is a symptom of insecurity. You can't help but see the failings and the holes in any partnership, and you can sometimes be quite reticent about entering a partnership. Generally, though, you will see what's wrong with a person at the outset of a relationship when it doesn't feel safe to you as yet. It's a defense mechanism more than anything! Your own insecurities can propel you to see faults and problems in your partner. Once you feel safe, however, you are not quite the fussbudget Venus in Virgo is made out to be. You value effort put into a relationship (in fact, for many with this position, effort from their partner is at the top of their list).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)