7.26.2011

Its A Long Road

Love requests Tonight



Who can;t realte to this song?

The Blonde knows all to well!!

I would do Anyhting For love



The Blonde wouldn't cross the street for it now but maybe one day!!

Maybe...

Got to keep the faith y'all!!

Or you die!

Pretty pretty Please



Fuck Everyone who needs perfection!!

We are fucking perfect, even with a shit mobile jag and storage full of past shit!!!

I am perfect!!

An fuck you big sis!!

I am going to curse, so get over it and your perfect fucked up self!!

The Blonde is over judgement!!

Nigerian Dumbass

...or maybe he was Jamaican, the accents are similar but the douche factor is the same and i could give a flying fecal part for these rampant little criminal master minds that have no hope of pulling anything off other than crank calls.

Apparently, their are enough idiots in the US that these scam scourge feel they can be profitable. I don;t know who is selling them the elderly contact information but I am going to put Wal-Mart behind this little disgusting act.

The idiot called from an unblocked number asking if my Mother shops at Wal-Mart and said she won a cash award.

She handed me the phone and I said ni my very nice 'hello kitty' voice, "What's the scam?"

The dude hung up.

Shocker!!

Next, the call came from a blocked number and I kept answering and they kept hanging up.

So they called one last time and I did not hang up. I left the phone locked on there call placed the phone down on the counter so it would make that irritating piercing noise for some reason.

Its a fun glitch in the phone when you have a crank call from a crack head.

Anyhoo,

They went to chapter two fo the most idiot scam artists in the world and attempted the following little diddy for us:

"Hello, I am kar amba Abu and I am CEO of the Nigerian bank Company. We have $2.5 million of your funds locked in transit and we need blah, blah, blah....."

Turnip trucks a plenty but not in this neck off the hills.

My Mother turning this into a major drama, I had to deal with it.

Always a lady, I gave a polite...

"You Nigerian Fuck!!"

...of which he responded by redialing my parents number over and over. Always hanging up when I was trying to give him more of my pleasantries. ]

Quite rude if you ask me!!!


Anyhoo, nipped it in the butt quickly..I couldn't play anymore with the dead head, i had work to get to.


*77 took care of that little douche's temper tantrum.

Go rage on someone in the boondocks dickhead.

We have private call blocking!!

Warn your GP's and elderly neighbors to just hit *77 on their AT&T phone. Be sure what other phone companies offer, so check around.


and it will block all calls that withhold their phone number.

This is the Blonde's Service Announcement!!

7.25.2011

take the Bad with the Good

I am checking out my birth chart and this is what is up this week:

Pretty acurate still....

You are more sensitive to, and frustrated by, anything that makes you feel stifled, restricted, oppressed, or restrained now. Your desire for independence or to feel unique and original is strongly stimulated, but you may not be going about it in the best manner. In fact, you might come across as rebellious, cantankerous, or hard to please. You may be especially impatient, impulsive, or prone to taking foolish risks. This stems from the desire to make changes in your life or to shake things up because you are sensitive to that which is boring, monotonous, or stale in your life.

I got a reminder of being careful to follow the right path.

The other night I watched Tatum O'Neil's reality show with Ryan on Oprah's network OWN. Its funny, I totally get where Tatum is coming form and that she is trying to work out things from her past.

I am in the same cycle of my life and trying to pull out successfully.

I have acknowledge the issues and now I am working on just letting them go and moving on. Sometimes the process is down right hard and sometimes certain things will catch the old wind of the past and stir up controversy with family.

You have to find closure on your own.

If you are looking for someone else to close the door to past regression or feelings...its always going to have a door stop in front of the door jam. Its going to stay cracked open with room for a slight breeze to set the door wide open and you back 10 feet from the finishing line of a happy life.

You have to pull that door shut on your own. Find closure from within...

I and Tatum must do that for ourselves...


But its nice to have a little virtual competition.

Mine won't be Hollywood style on a reality show which makes my odds a little more favorable.

You can live happily ever after with those who might have done you, a few things wrong.


The Blonde has a chart, not steps!!

7.23.2011

Oh Beth

The very first rock band song I heard; it was the backside of my older sisters 45 and to this day...the best song ever!!

Too Much Love Will Kill You Everytime



goda dei miei amici!!

Its been a bad day, let music lift us up!!!

The Blonde's heart is in Norway!!!

7.22.2011

The Breast Feeding Babydoll



Maybe I have a perverted mind but I can't help but think of other places someone might place the magnetic bra and have the baby doll sucking on some unsavory body parts...

If I can think this creatively, imagine little Johnny stealing the baby doll and bra
from baby sister and wanking his little tiddley tot with the sucking mechanical mouth.

but than again, I grew up with the baby doll with the magic disappearing milk bottle.

Think how many pedophiles logged on to youtube to watch an 8 year old put on a bra and play Mommie.

On another note, the chick who breast feeds 4 year old Ari in the park is not only gross its unnatural and someone needs to have a serious talk with reaching healthy boundaries in the maturing of their chi...hii..ii..ld..!!

When they have teeth and can walk, yu need to loose the tit Mother.

I thought my cat's crusty hairball was gross but this apparently beat it by 30% gross factor.

breast feeding is natural to the Mother and child but, even I, as a woman am not comfortable with a strange woman's tit dangling while calling for little Betty to come hither at my local Starbucks.

The Blonde is not into new age rugrat rearing!!

80% is What You Do

20% is what fate has in store for you.

I am suffering a few minor setbacks when it comes to playing catch up and saving for my university future.

80% is what I can handle, what happens or does not happen because of me.

Then there is the pesky 20% - no matter how hard I apply myself, no matter how hard I try to get where I am going - a mile long road block hits and I am stuck.

Faced with having to turn around and find another way.

I could be unconventional and go off the beaten path and work in camouflage hiding myself from that 20% fate but it will soon catch up with me.

So what is a Blonde to do?

Watch sappy John Hughes films today, wash the crusted hairball off my duvet, play virtual host to HCG protocol confused...

and keep on...

keeping on!!

Its too damn hot to push through that road blocks today, anyway.


The Blonde is 100% glad its Friday!!

7.21.2011

Unattainable Dreams

How many times can I be lead up a mountain, to be shown everything I want and work so hard to get...

"Here, here is your dream, laid out for you. Try to reach out and grab it."

And just as a reach out to grab it with all my might,

A gust of my reality whips up under my feet and thrusts me back down the mountain.

How many times must i be told by the powers that be...

I can't have it, no matter how hard I try.

When do I break?

When do I say...

Enough is enough!

1 year?

5 years?

10 years?

Am I cursed?

If this life is only a lesson to learn from a past life than I am done.

I don't feel it really should continue.

There is karmic retribution for past sins and than there is just fucking abuse by the Gods.

I am going to keep beating down the doors until I have exhausted everything.

But I do feel its totally acceptable to cash in my lessons and move on to another life within 5 years of this one.

Its a date with destiny...

5 years from now on my birthday...if life keeps handing me raw deals...

I will know I tried my hardest and will have no regrets to carry with me in the next life.

Surviving a life is not a life worth living!!

The BLonde will set her own agenda!

7.17.2011

Bumble the Blonde

I was going to write a little diddy on chemistry.com and eharmony.com but something caught my attention at the local HEB grocery store today.

Bumble and Bumble hair products run $45 a bottle on sale. The sales clerk said its flying off the shelves. I hardly believe that when there is a sale on the couture hair products. Things that command that price and fly off the shelf stay at the chosen rip-off price.

But I have to say "hail to Bumble and Bumble" and to those that can afford a shampoo for $50. It shows me that not everyone is effected by the recession or poor job market.

I wonder if I made boo-coo bucks, would I buy the Bumble schlep?

I buy Infusium for $5 and when i read the ingredients of both products- my brand had all the ingredients as the Bumble and Bumble minus a root extract.

Out of curiosity, I might by the Bumble brand but more for novelty and armed with a biased opinion, I probably would not find it so fabulous and continue with my Infusium products.

But God Bless those insecure folks that thrive on paying big dollar to feed their need to be better than everyone else.

The Blonde is more humble than bumble!

7.16.2011

Getting around with Meetup.com

Internet dating has become a plethora of grossness.


Its really become the club that was hot at one time but the fugly crowd got a hold of it and the cool peeps stopped showing up.

That's internet dating.

So how does the good crowd find people to meet?

The cool new place is meetup.com

You join a club of interest and you show up to outings and hopefully, eventually there might be a mate for you.

Personally don;t use it as a hook-up site, you will just end up ruining its intent.

Have fun in the club without looking for someone and you will start enjoying being by yourself, having fun with men and women, and you will loose the desperate tag that's been dangling off your aura.

Finding someone has come full circle and its not the bars or the web. Days of posting your age and salary, sifting through lies and false advertisements are left for the seedy crowd.

I noticed match.com went back to letting you surf the profiles without adding yours. A sure sign that they are on the outskirts and headed the way of myspace--if their lucky.

At least myspace has cool independent bands to listen to.

I personally only sign up for the ones that are special invitation but I am very careful about who I surround myself with because I am not a great judge of character and I need a virtual bouncer protecting me.

The Blonde found a new route to take!

7.15.2011

Housewives of New York

I know many people call the housewives show a waste of time but i think its an excellent source of information regarding what to look out for in women friends.

I could take years of psychology courses and still not have the insight like this show has provided. Granted the women stir up conflict to benefit their face time on the shows and you have to take most of it with a martini and swallow hard.

But some of it, if you pay attention may see some characteristics or behavior in your own friends and will think twice next time when trusting them carte blanche.

Women seem to gravitate to a certain person in the group based on their certain situations at the time.

I probably would hang out with Kelly and bag the other wenches. Yes Kelly is an odd bird but she is not spiteful. Her little weird tirades are more or less for the face time.

Sonya...not at all...you are who you hang with and that is not who I want to be.

Countless....I like her, she is having fun and she gives appropriate digs when warranted.

Jill would bully me on everything and I would end up going in her direction and not the direction I want for myself.

Ms Kansas and Simon just freak me out. They are super creepy.

And the new chick...she has young kids and I am way passed my 'Mommie and me" friends.

And last but not least, Ms. Pino Grigio..if she is pregnant..gross!! 54 is not only ridiculous age to have a child but she is clearly doing it out of fear of losing her husband and that is never a good thing.

Right Martha?

I have tried to get with the jersey chicks but they are so harsh in mannerism...ughh!! I rather watch Dog the Bounty Hunter.

If I were doing women studies, they Housewives would be my thesis.

The Blonde rather be a lover!

7.14.2011

Busy Bee

I feel great knowing some income is coming in and once my financial packets come from SMU and know I can afford to go to school, I will look for work in Dallas.

I am still on my kick to work at a Sunflower market; especially the diet and supplement area. I really have found my nitch.

I am thinking I might try some bioscience classes but realize my ADD can cause me to drail from prelaw and thus my major will be in something analytical and maybe squeeze in the bioscience as a minor.

All in all, the world is not a fabulous place totally for me.

I still have a lot of catching up to do as far as finances and getting my car road ready but its slowly getting better.
I am going to have to raise my debt ceiling when school starts but until then I am trying to rake in some dough for the famine that will be coming ahead.

I will need to stack up on raman noodles.

It would be great if I could win the lottery to cover school expenses but somehow I don't think that is going to happen.

I did refer to my natal chart and there might be a money windfall in the form of a marriage.

I definitely will not hold my breath for that one.

Recovery in a recession is slow, for me and the country. I am just glad I am not alone.

It makes me feel like less of a loser.

The Blonde is rising up!!

7.12.2011

My Rock-a-Billy Died Tonight

One of my and Austin's favorite musicians was murdered last night.

Its weird because I had a dream of a dead man with slicked back hair lying like he was asleep underneath clear water behind my old pink house.

And in my dream, I told people he was there and all they did was murk up the water over him until you could not see him any more.

I kept telling them he is there, you have to wait for the water to clear.

Wait, wait...he is there...

and then a break in the cloudy water showed his face.

And there was my friend laying with his body straight, his hair slicked back , and a perfect Elvis like black suit...untouched.

I got the news today, he was murdered. Blunt force trauma in front of an Autozone.

I am very certain who and what he was waiting for and I hate that he was still involved in something that made me quit being his friend.

Its been awhile since I have spoken to him but I found the uncut samples that he asked me to produce and promote.

I played it tonight.

I never did think he could kill his fondness for the snow.

So I tucked the songs away and moved on.

I hate that I was right.

I hate even more that his 8 year old daughter that he loved more than life but less than coke is going to be without her Daddy.

Damn you, damn you!!

A steel guitar wont have my freind's fingers strumming on it ever again.

And my heart breaks tonight!

The Blonde lost her tune tonight!

Go Mustangs

I just received my acceptance letter for SMU in Dallas. This is my first choice school, one because of its locale and two becuz of its so much more awsome than living in Waco.

OK so my reason is location, location ,location.

But I am going to be somewhere for the next 3 years and I would like to find a personal life along with the studies.

Waco offers....nada to to me!


Am I going to get to go?

That is the Million dollar question only because it takes a small fortune to go to SMU and Baylor for that matter.

Hopefully, SMU will swing some grants my way and I will continue working through the summer to see if I can afford a studio in midtown.

Uptown is a definite no...the prices for a studio or 'G' plus.

I wonder if Dove or some anti-aging cream company will sponsor my way through school?

I figure the Larry Crowne film will shed a nice Hollywood light on the plight of the older student and push me toward my financial goal to cover coasts.



The Blonde is not quite of the gate!

7.10.2011

Customer Support

but to keep them as a customer, let them be right.

I am customer support and that means taking the haters with the lovers. I am so uplifted when someone calls and brags about their success in losing weight.

GAH!

I had no idea how being overweight and wanting to lose it is such a huge battle for so many people. I did not realize what a prig I have been for berating them during cocktails with freinds.

I feel like a total douche.

I am 5'9" and never weighed more than 130 accept for when I was plumped up to 160 carrying Boo. he still owes me a tummy tuck. Of course Boo tells me if I didn't gorge on ice cream I wouldn't need anything.

Touche Boo Boo!!

Anyhoo,

I had wonderful customers today but for every fab contact there is always one to bring one down in this game.

I was called inept, uninformed, obviously stupid...duh..tah...duhhh

Did I hit my anger button and call on my condescending repetitoir to combat this hater femme.

NO! I did not!

If it wasd my company, I might be little less understanding but I am still the professional.

If she is frustrated, its not because of me or the product I support. She needed to vent and I am there to take her hot air and try to make it right.

You know the HCG is not a silly product and it can give people the boost they need to find a happier existence of life through healthier eating.

Sunscreen is still my major plug for people but modifying eating habits to feel better about yourself ranks second to the sunscreen.

So call me and beat me up. I am not giving up on you. I want you to feel beautiful even when its hard to look in a mirror and say it!!

I lost everything because of stupid mistakes I made along the way and I know how hard it is to face the mirror every morning and say, "Hey, today will be better."

And many today's passed by and nothing got better but I am not giving up and little by little my days are getting better.

I used to be so much more than this but I am only beginning to get back up.

So, go ahead and hit me with what you got, cause I got so much more!!

Bring it On!!

The Blonde can take some punch!

The HCG Guinea Pig

I need another subject in my HCG study and so who better than my Ma-Me 'dieter extraordinaire'. She has never been able to stick to a diet, is a complete wiz at coming up with ingenious substitutes to sabotage any successful diet plan.

She is perfect for my study!!

I am already down from 132 to 129 in 3 days but I am someone who can follow a diet. I am not nibbling like I usually do.

Yesterday, I deviated the diet protocol with a banana (not on the list) and 4 breaded shrimp ( breaded is a serious no-no for me in general)but I cut out a helping of vegetables to equal it out.

See, you can be a tiny bit bad but it did effect the 1 lbs a day loss. I only lost ounces yesterday.

Anyhoo,

Back to my Guinea pig. On her first day of dieting, low and behold...substitutions in the form of blueberries with cream. Cream is not on the list. I will excuse the blueberries because they actually have less sugar than an apple and its a great anti-oxidant fruit.

I am fairly certain my results will be successful. I am fairly confident ma-me will be a living testament to what not to do on a diet protocol...

If the drops only work to motivate someone and keep them conscious about turning to a healthier nutritional lifestyle...its worth it.

But seriously, I do not feel as hungry as before. And I am always hungry.

I am a perpetual fridge door opener every time I pass the kitchen.

If and when i build a home...the kitchen will be around thhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gife pool in the pool house and unattached to my living quarters.

I tried painting the walls baby blue which some book suggested help curb appetite. It did nothing but make the kitchen look like a baby boy's room.

So, Ma-Me's BMI is 127. I would put her weight down but she would probably try to kill me with her lavender floor cleaner.


The Blonde is making her own blind study!!

7.08.2011

How Pretty Humans Are Underneath



at least, the physical aspect. I know a lot of butt ugly down under the epidermis but this blog is not about the haters.

This is a rotating picture (compliments of wikipedia) of a fingertip. The pretty little waves are the different layers of fat underneath the skin.

I discovered this photo when I began researching the HCG product I am trying and if you look to your left selling as well.

Its not enough to take someone's word that a product works. I have to try it for myself. And although I do not need to loose weight, I am a bit obsessed about the subject and like every other femme would like to be five pounds thinner than I am.

And of course, Like most femm-a-bods, when I loose the five pounds, I will want to loose five more.

I have taken HCG for about five days. The first 3 days I was hungry and cranky. I blame the colon cleanse on the cranky bit but oddly enough I am not so irritated (with exception of Augusto -- still wickedly chapped at him) and I...

and hold on to this shocker...

Have not been interested in wine lately.

I know...

Messing with my vino habit is a huge drawback as far as I am concerned but I am hoping that instinct will kick in and my happy vino time will come back so I can enjoy my American Spirit (no additives does not mean a safer cigarette--whatever, es it does) the porch when the moon hits again.


OK

so the HCG drops I take has curbed my appetite...not just for wine and puffery but for food, in general, as well...

I think I ate an egg and a plum today...still not hungry.


Its only been five days and so let's see if the noshing comes back with the vino.

If its a bogus product, I will let my readers know.

I wont stop working for the company because I like the fact they do use real product without fillers, it pays well, I work from home, and I make my own hours.

And if anyone has been paying attention to this blog..you know how desperately I need a job that can fit around school and afford me some stress free study time.

Half the battle is not having the urge to eat.

The Blonde is concentrating on her inside!

7.07.2011

Infedelity Keeps Us Together

The recent New York Times magazine article about the praises of infidelity to keep a marriage alive leaves me out of the 'US' in the title.

I am not married. I am the single chick who men in relationships try to get with to keep their 'real' commitment to the other woman in tact.

Mother F$#@%!!!!!

I can't tell you how this article struck a debacle in my chord!

Not because I was reading it as a married person, of which I might be more sympathetic, and even more so, I would be all for pandering the help of some safe girl for my hubby if I was not in the mood for sex for half a century or so...
As long as he provdes for me a wonderful life...I would provde him with the same.

Just don't put it in my face and let me be the main love and...

But I am not the wife that is taken care of.

I am the girl that Augusto thinks should take care of him while he takes care of his wife.

Yes, Augusto is married and its not a problem as long as we stick to tennis and biking and our friday night happy hour.

Going to Miami was not a problem. I treated him like my gorgeous gay. I had my own room and I was with a gorgeous hunk to flutter around the beach with and still free to mingle with other men!!

BUT!

Augusto just moved back to Austin and wants to pick up at the beginning of the realtionship when he was seperated or divorced or whatever lie I was gullible enough to believe 6 years ago.

I started this blog because of this sucubine jerk and its taken me years to just be alright with him as a freind but now...

I have had all I can take from his whining to wheel be back into a relationship that is not a realtionship worth having.

I am single, going to law school, and still pretty fucking cute so why on earth would I consider going to a school, not based on its merit, but rather its vicinity to an easy love nest (which I am paying for) for this turd extrodinaire?!

Sorry Augsuto,

I am headed to where the single men roam free around the campus that is in the top 5 of law schools in Texas.

After chewing his ass out for even suggesting such bologne...


This Blonde is on a hunger strike!!