Party until your panties drop but don't take that drink on the road.

The life you save might be a Blondes.



The Pretty Cookies

...are not for me!!


Treated like the unwanted stepchild left over from a second marriage, I was told to eat only the horribly disfigured mutant cookies.

It would be one thing if the cookies were for guests or for presents but nope, they are just there to look pretty in the cookie jar.

Eventually the cookie jar will disappear as my Mother systematically tries to hide the pretty cookies still assuming we fall for her holiday scams.

When asked where the pretty cookies went...she will simply say that they are for freinds and she needs to pack them and mail them.

Of course the undisclosed location is for their safety...right!!

The pretty cookies will never get mailed.

They will however show up in cars and bedrooms as little crumbs of there former cookie self.

I am so used to the Christmas scam that I didn't even blink an eye when I asked for a gingerbread house which disappeared right after she gave me a laundry list of fake people she is giving them too.

I have know idea where the ginger houses disappeared too but seeing as they will be difficult for Mo' to consume the entire gingerbread hood before spring....

...the ant trail will eventually clue me in after the turn of the New Year!!

The Blonde is keeping with tradition!!


What Flatulence!!

I went to Neiman Marcus to pick out some christmas favors and low and behold did to my wandering nose appear?

Making my eyes water up as if they caught winter wonderdust?

Someone ripped a huge one in between the glass entry way of the store letting the sun bake in and heat the odor to a remarkably potent stench.

Open the second glass doors and the waft of perfume mixed with the fartabulous that almost brought me to my knees!!

What the F?

For fart that is..

What kind of jack arse does this sort of thing?

I can only think of one and duh, wouldn;t you know..it would be someone I went out with.

We went to the Celtics / Lakers game and in the elevator crammed full of body heat, he rips a silencer.

I knew it was him even if his face stayed plain as day. After all, he was my date.

Who else would be such a putz?


I left Neimans unable to take the vibrant mix of holiday arse spirits.

The Blonde hopes this season you keep your hot air to yourself!!!


Its Over!!

Fall semester did not close with a bang but more a close 'C' thud.
I pulled off a 3.5 GPA but I need a 3.7 to close the deal on law school.

I will make a point not to sign up for dating sites next semester.

Dating is too damn time consuming.



Make up



blah, blah, blah.....

It takes at least 3 hours to pull your look together for potential boyfriends.

10 dates x 3 hours = a crap load of time taken away each week from studying.

I am simplifying next semester.

I have my classes and my 2 men booked for the semester.

Now I can relax and enjoy my holiday season .

Look out Apsen, here I come!!

The Blonde is booked solid!!!


The Ups and Downs of 69

I am not one to blab about the boudoire or what happens inside other than a bit of generality and I am not about to start.

I do, however, do like to get in creative debates during happy hour with friends and since politics and religion is taboo and absolute no fun...sex is the next best thing.

We settled on the topic of karma sutra and how do crazy positions, while spice thing up, and keeps the bed from a bore fest, ultimately is just plain stupid.

At least that was my argument.

How the he--double hockey sticks do you concentrate on one end while the other end is being worked on.

It can't be done to equal satisfaction, something has to give.

If anyone is screaming for pleasure they certainly aren't working the sucking vortex you need to make the other one moan.

I just think there are better ways of using positions, like moving your arse to a hot tub, shower, or outside under the moon.

There are 72 positions in the karma sutra and this is only one.

I hold my tongue until I try the rest.

That's the Blondes position on things!!


Playing in Urban

I have been living it up urban style with my new out -of -town beau in a hotel suite downtown this week. Ughhh!!

Not the beau!

...the hotel thing in your home town isn't quite as posh as living it up in another town. Not to mention, I did a crap pack job and was too lazy to drive the distance to el casa to refill my wardrobe.

I forgot saline solution, toothpaste, hairspray, curling iron and panties.

I was working in third world fashion and makeup mode.

I could have gone the 8 mile distance to get the stuff I forgot but I never made it past happy hour.

Neither did my car!

I crashed the side into a wall for the second time this month. The first time I was being bullied by a prick in an SUV coming out of the narrow garage opening and I tried nice - inched over too far and scraped the bee jee bees out of my vehicle.

Nice ended the moment I felt the scraping and before douche could blink - my window was down and douche came rushing out of my curled up lips faster than the Stig can stear a Ferarri FXX around a lap.

After all his car shoving you think he would have stood his ground but instead he backed up an dwent the other way.

Was that so hard?

Couldn't he have done it before I wrecked the side of my vanden plas?

The second time might have been one of those incidences where wine may or may not have been involved. I am not confessing to anything especially since the car slots at the boutique hotel were meant for skinny asian spinner cars and not my luxury sedan.

Trying to park my car downtown when I am used to parking in suburban sprawl is like putting a sweater on my cat.

Its hard and you end up getting scratched up!!

Anyhoo, I totally have a story on 69 but I am trying to spread the blog wealth so check back in a few.

The Blonde is back in her element!!

Working the Cam

The Blonde is using visual blog filler until my lazy arse is in writing mode again!!


Marriage Minded

So I never got the on your knees, ring in hand, promise to always love you kind of thing.

So I aspire to have it.

And why wouldn't I?

We all aspire to have more title, more respect, more affirmation in life.

When you have never been properly asked to be married, you have to wonder...what is wrong with me?

What have I not done to succeed in my personal life?

I realize I am a late bloomer and now after all the shadows of my past are not worthy to tangle with me in a boxing ring, I want what I should have had long ago.

I want a husband.

I have been dating so long, single so long..there isn't anyone who can get past my bulls**t meter.

They all tell you what you want to hear up front, but come a few months down the road and they get comfortable...things slip and if you in tune, you notice and listen and you leave.

Don't waste time.

Keep dating until someone puts a ring on your finger.

Money talks and the rest walks away leaving something really great behind.

I am not spending my life comforting lonely fools who think they found a comfort patsy.

They need to hit younger and a little mo' blonde than me.

The Blonde wants the ring around the finger!!


Butting Blonde with a Liberal

So I have gone out a few times with 'the liberal' and every once in awhile we will not see eye to eye on some form of politics. I being a laisse-faire more conservative participant to politics; my liberal is a leftist to the umpth degree and gets his pants all bunched up if I say something he drastically does not approve of.

I am usually half-hearted or say things that are for shock value just to see his face get squirmy and his eyes do this little bulge thing.


Blonde head butt to the left.


Crap, I got hit by liberalist attitude.

I usually quickly recover and find it a most excellent moment to keep my mouth mumz.

Mumz the word when it comes to politics, especially after a few drinks and passion arises a bit more in me than usual.

The liberal, however, probably keeps the same passion about his politics with or without said libations.

I never get offended by anyone's opinion and I won't strongly argue against it since I really do not take that much of a vested interest in regards to politics. I know enough to know what I like and don't like.

Sort of like wine.

I only get offended when the liberal says things to me like,

"You would look really great in a sari."

"You will love India."

love India?

India is not on my holiday agenda. Sari!!

Why that offends me I have no idea. maybe its because women who wear saris usually are under a subordinate role playing game in the traditional sense.

The Blonde is hardly a substitute for an obliging woman when her fashion sense is attacked by such a small statement.

Ah screaming liberals...you have to hate them.

I do like conservative democrats. But I digress sometimes.

The Blonde is a capitalist with dreams of Monte Carlo...wearing Prada!!


Regulations Regarding PDA

Having come into my own during the decade of preppy, I believe in restraint and reserve public displays of affection for only those men I am fully committed to.

I do not like being walked to my car so I can be mauled by a man I just met for a first date.

What is with men?

Are there no gentlemen?

Where the heck are the manners for men 50 and below. They are severely in need ettiquette school.

The worst ones are the ex-football pleyers who think they are still in high school and expect to get lucky with the ladies. Seriously dude, you own a carpet store and lost half you hair.

The glory days are over for you.

So be polite and treat a girl with some respect.

As usual I only gripe about the really bad dates. I have had many dates with very nice gentlemen who are sweet and know some old fashion rules that I like to live by.

And thus they are spared my blog posting. I like protecting the inoccent and calling out the not so ones.

I know when I want someone and I being the femme part of the equation I get to go first and I will let it be known.

Its called communicating with flirtation.

If you don't see at the dinner table, don't expect it near a car.

If you missed the slight flirt, you get the second chance of knowing by my leaning toward you to give you a kiss goodnight on the cheek and if I grant another date, than its safe to say, I am wanting that kiss.

On occassion, if I really like someone all those rules disappear in a haze of romantic bliss.

For the rest of you fools...Do not follow a girl to her car unless you are seriously looking out for her well being and not trying to get lucky in a parking lot.


The Blonde is laying down some law!!


BOO!! Eureka!!!

I finally figured a way to get my blog to work on my new laptop.

OK..well, I have a crap load of new stuff to dish out.

I have hit the wall. A man wall.

I have had more dates this time around than in any other 30 day history of online dating.

This go around I had 3 sites working for me.

only one is up and thank gah...I am literally exhausted.

Let me get through the Halloween and Day of the Dead and I will start unloading the dish.

The Blonde is Boo ya!!


Starlight Mini Urban Drive-In

Watching 'Dirty Harry' in the hood.

This little rugged mini drive in is the newest attraction to the East side of Austin.

It fits 10 cars and has outside seating if you didn't reserve a spot.

They have gourmet sliders at the concession airstream and snow cones at the old boat.

Check it out:


The Blonde is living it up large screen in Austin chill-ville!!

Hog Riding Texas Style

Damn if I am not having a ball exercising my right to have fun.

The Blonde is snorting it up!!


Black Beans

...does not offer a sexy aftermath. Its best to just get home and say thank you that it is a crisp fall night and open a window.

While I take rest from dating, I have to say some dates cause a sort of indigestion since they.begin with an easy  meeting for coffee or Mexican food and if the sparks didn't fly for the date, you can rest assured you won' be disappointed at the end of the evening when you arrive home and chew on a Beeno. And sparks can still fly

...just light a match under you bum and wait for the wind to rip.

Like gas, dating is  a pain in the ass but eventually you settle down with a few good men and get back to a less gassy diet.

All in all, the very right decision to ditch the DFeX has been reaffirmed over and over by the few good men I have had the pleasure of sharing a drink with.

Time will tell before their kinks begin to show but I am fairly certain I am more suited to someone who is a little more active than the deadpan in Dallas.

I have been to several music concerts, been wined and dined at the finest restaurant, I have a date to a mini drive-in theater and I am enjoying a picnic come this Sunday.

I like playing house but playing it all the time is for someone in their retirement age and I just don't ever plan on being that old.

The Blonde has hitting the gas again!!


Hold On to Your Curiosity

I have a crap load to tell...

not tonight!

but soon!

I am just shaking my head in dismay for now.

The Blonde is just down right fed up!!!


Back Away From the Spray

Vanity has hit the masses of men and tanning spray is their demise.

Its one thing to watch the fools on FOX TV sport the new orange made popular by Snookie but its a completely an unacceptable doctrine when its sported by a man I pluck off the internet to meet up with me at a sacred 5 star eatery of mine.


If you ae going to fake tan, learn these lessons.

Rub it in.

Really rub it in.


Wash your hands.

Really wash your hands.

And more importantly, Men; remember bronzer and sunless tanner follows the rule of white shoes. 

Never after Labor Day!!

The Blonde is standing firm!!! 


Guilt is a Silly Emotion

I felt bad because I was living my life and moving on with a great new profile on a dating site that has yielded 71 emails in less than a week.

I have already been on three dates and each one has been such a breath of fresh air that  I felt guilty about my ex.

I sent an email extending an olive branch and after being accused of drama...I am guilt free to live out a happy and love filled life.

Some people will always believe the world is at fault and see themselves as the victim and you can't save them from that.

Let them have their misery.

I choose steak and cake and fabulous dates!!

The world is back at my feet and the men are calling.

I am better for the choosing too!

No more curmudgeon for me!!

The Blonde is emoting happiness!! 

The Olive Branch

can only be extended so far before you find your grip slipping and as much as you want to hold on, you know you will end up drowning if you keep trying.

So you let go...and at first it hurts. You think you could have saved them if they were just willing to hold on as much as you were willing to hold on.

Now the branch is gone, the soul you wanted to save with your love has slipped away.

What are you going to do?

Die with it?

Hell NO!!

You are going to pick yourself up from the bank of water. You are going to towel yourself off.

You are going to blow dry your hair, curl it in a sexy swirl.

And get on with meeting a man that doesn't need an olive branch.

A man that can meet you half way.

A man who will love you like you love him.

I waited too long to settle for some fool that has no intention of putting any effort into a relationship.

If only money did it for me.

But unfortunately I think I deserve more!!

The Blonde doesn't settle for cheap allowances!!


Choosing a Law School

isn't half as important as choosing how I am going to use my law degree.

The most importnat thing to have is passion for who your are and what you want to achieve.

I read of all the injustices in the world and my degree can;t come quick enough.

I should have been a lwayer years ago but maybe fate didn't think I was ready.

Now, I am.

In the wake of seeing my student loans on hiatus at the junior college I attend, I have to get busy looking for a 4 year university. It doesn't really matter where I go because I don;t need an impressive school to become an impressive lawyer.

I have the drive, the ambition, the passion to make the world a better place and with a law degree I am the bad guys karmic retribution. Maybe when I was younger I would have been in it for the money and the prestige.

Now I am in this for the long haul in changing the world for better.

So watch out bad guys!!

The Blonde is going legal on you!


Can I live in My Car & Go to Berkeley?

I don;t know but I just asked them.

I think the best place to go to school and get a superior education without the funds to live is Berkeley!

I can't think of anywhere else I could live out of my car, afford school, and still hold my head up high!!

Cross your fingers for me!

I really need to be free!

The Blonde is not looking for saviors; only a parking pass to be saved!

Bad Benny

I don't know if its me or the benadryl but the pink tabs do not konk me out like the gel tabs do. I took a gel tab yesterday and I was a waste basket.

I am telling you it makes a great substitute for zanax.

I was as calm as a cucumber all day.

I wasn;t much of a talker or listener for that matter but it was a very relaxing and unproductive day.

The great thing about the gel benny is that it helps me sleep at night.  I still get up at 2 when the allergy part of the benadryl wares off but I pop another one and I am back to nappy in no time at all.

Today I feel great. I had a great night's rest and now I am on a cleaning roll.

Pop in my rock music, head to academy to buy a bunch of foot lockers to put summer clothes away, and get busy on my studies!

Its a good day!

The Blonde is on a happy high!


Textbook Education

My total for 3 textbooks came to $455.00

Texas Governement  95$ New

Macroeconomics 170$ New

American History II 120$ New

All the used was taken and now that I think about it, I should rent all 3 books at $150 for the semester.

I spent more on these three books than I did buying my fall wardrobe!!
I was going to finish my fall look with a burberry blouse but I have to settle for the burberry skirt I hopefully, cross your fingers, win on ebay today.

I understand the scam of the textbook. And if the professors are making a decent living on the residuals they get from these books than the scam is fine by me.

Its not!

The book dealers and the publishers are making a nice killing while holding my personal bank for book ransom.

Highway robbery at its finest.

Edition 14, 15, and so on which are all the same book but with the pages mixed up in each new edition so you are forced to buy the new one or be lost in the follow along program in class.

Used books are even worse. You pay 3/4 of the original price for the book-and being old school- I get a little ticked that the previous student highlighted or marked it up.

What if the student sucked in his highlighting and note taking and I get caught up in his/her bright yellow idiot marks?


Summer is officially over and I have permanently put a cork in my wine and spirited play and have just settled in to my haute couture textbooks for a long fall lesson.

And I still can sell my books on craigslist or amazon at the end of the semester for more than what textbook.com will give me trade-in for.

The Blonde is learning the price of things!


finger eleven - One Thing

Today's musical gift to you!! Hope you enjoy!

You will be redirected and deal with 10 seconds of ads but well worth the beauty of this song!

The Blonde is busy with other things!

Best Break Up Therapy

Online Shopping!!

I am gearing up for fall fashion and with the online sales, I can get a little more bang for my buck.
Like the Victoria Secret Motorcycle jacket for $78 originally $228. It will go perfectly with my Ebay purchased Uggs.
I also hit J.Crew sales for my preppy inspired looks but I ended up with a few military staples.

The most important find of the century is discovering that Zara will offer online shopping September 8!!

Now all I need is a blue blazer, argyle sweater, burberry shirt and skirt, and I am set for the fall fun!

The best way to feel better about yourself after a break up is to fix yourself up and get back out there and enjoy life.

The Blonde is under repair!!


Who Got The Boot?

Tommy Hilfiger Thigh High Duck Boot

The Blonde got the boot!

Dallas likes Big

especially in their resort hotels.


Cool as Cool Gets

They look like an Abercrombie and Fitch Ad.

The Blonde likes cool things!

Better late than Never

is fine on some things but when it comes to financial aid, the fed ex slogan needs to apply.

"When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight"

I have emailed, telephoned, and now I am incommunicado with financial aid because those less lazy have gone down in person and have a line formed that would be worth standing only if they were handing out the aid in cash. meanwhile I will wait for my electronic response because I am a lazy x-generation student that feels its a waste of gas to get nowhere.

In the meantime, I was able to purchase my books and begin class which is a good thing because it will take my mind of other things.

I am still upset about my missing kitty cat and last night I had an awful dream that he came home with his tail end shredded off. And to make matters worse, I was awoken from this dream by a horrible screeching sound outside my window. My heart was racing and I jumped from the bed, still half asleep, and opened the window to see what was going on. I thought an animal was being torn apart outside but alas....


It was the air conditioner unit. Not sure if it was mine or the neighbors but the sound stop and I was wide awake for the rest of the morning. 

What the hell am I supposed to do with awakeness at 7 am in the morning!? 

I don;t need a jump start on my day!


I went for a walk looking for my long lost furry baby, again.

I will take the signs down in a couple of days and eventually my search will end and the guilt will continue and the hope that one day he might be back will take a long time to die down in my heart.

I just hope wherever he is...that he hasn't or doesn't suffer.

In the meantime...

The Blonde says hooo-rah for school again!!


The Full Moon?

Is it a glitch or is it evil at its bewitching hour?

Thrice I have tried to post this blog and thrice it went blank.

After pouring my heart and soul into the matter three times before, I have only this to offer.

A freak in an early 90s model red Chevy truck stalked my arse as I jogged the main street in my hood enough to make me duck in hedges and wait out his drive by's. I finally got home and was so disturbed by the freak that I called the PD.

I am used to some brake and flirt when I run on the road  but this was beyond harmless play. This dude waited in side streets while traffic chilled and than he bolted toward me.

If I see this truck again, he is the one who will need to run!!

The Blonde is shaken but not deterred!!

I Am Lost

even more so than my cat!!

A lot of things have been lost in the past few weeks. 



A Cat


The only thing I haven't lost is my luggage. Its such a good set of luggage too. 

Guaranteed to pack up a relationship in less than an hour with room to spare for a broken heart.

I don't know what life has in store for me. I am sure calling God a dick didn't help any but lately he hasn't helped much anyway.

Like I say:

 if you want a life done right; you have to do it yourself!

The Blonde is soul searching!!

PS. Sorry I called you a dick, God!! 


Where is Peppy?

My flyer campaign is working. It would have worked better had my family put them up while I was in Dallas. I knew they wouldn't put up posters. Slackers!!


the frustration and feeling helpless in Dallas just burst open the other day and I am now home looking feverishly for my little guy.

I don't know if I will find him but at least I feel better that I am doing everything possible to find him.

If you want a job done right, sometimes you just have to do it yourself.

The Blonde will find something!!


I'm not asking

and I am not praying....

I am telling you GOD....

Bring back my cat!!

I don't deserve this.

I am sick and tired of always looking over my shoulder to see what you will do to fuck up my day.
Just when I think things are going well...you throw a right hook and wipe the floor with me.


I have fucking had it!!


The Blonde is beginning to think GOD is a dick!!


Oops, My Blonde

My fish was just at the other end of the pond!!

Blonde Moment!


My Fish Is Gone

We bought new fish for the pond and one in particular seemed to be an old soul that I knew. It would come to me every time I went outside and let me pet it.

Today, it was gone.


And I can't help but think what soul came by to revisit me?

And why did it have to leave so suddenly?

I guess nature is that way. And if we are smart enough to view it in its proper form, we get so much out of such an insignificant creature in such little amount of time.

I knew from the beginning that fish would not be with me long. I knew it but still a little bit of shock and sadness runs through me today.

I thought I would have just a bit longer with it.

I hoped it would stay even though deep down it would go soon.

Funny how things are, don't you think?

A brief encounter with a fish leaves an empty spot in my soul and I am still glad I got the chance to love it just a little bit.

I just wish I loved it more in the short time I had.

Its poetic considering the things that have happened around me lately.

Goodbye my sweet fish.

Good night my sweet soul, wherever and whom ever you may be.

I am alright if that's what you were wondering.

The Blonde still remains true to her nature!!


The Problem With Sophistication

...is that it costs so much more than not. Trying to be a stylish person on a budget is difficult to pull off unless you are able to dress in younger styles.

But if you want the conservative, sophisticated styles it takes to really show yourself well...


I am not in that income bracket yet.

I used to be but not for awhile now and anything that might have been suitable for the affair I need it for has long worn its welcome out in my closet.

I stopped subscribing to Vogue and Elle just before I went back to school. Why torture myself with the beautiful things I can not have at the moment.


discount shopping 101 tomorrow...ugh!!!

Just once I would like to put layers of designer bags, dresses, and shoes in a giant pile of fabulousness and roll around in it for a bit.

The Blonde needs a black dress!


Hummin' Along

While old black betty-aka. the jag-is in the shop, I had my BFs Hummer to commute back to Austin today. I knew it would be fun because driving a a new and cool vehicle would break up the monotony of driving, once again, to Austin.

What I did not know is how wonderful a feel I got from driving it. It felt like I was in a love lock hug with my boyfriend the whole ride through.

For the past several commutes, I was in fear of wiping out in my car because of the steering rack. It was so ingrained in me that every time I took the Hummer around a curve, I clinched my neck waiting for the steering to slip. It took me a few curves before I could relax my muscles and drive in utter bliss, and my mind farthest away from any fear.

Once I relaxed and realized this Hummer had my back, it occurred to me how much my boyfriend has given me. The most important being the luxury to be able to sigh relief of my
woes under his care.

I promised not to write about him so I am only going to plug him just a little...


but that is all I am going to say

out of respect for his privacy!!

The hummer got between 9 to 16 miles per gallon on this ride but the joy of it was worth the Franklin I have to put in her at the pump. It is as big and fabulous a personality as my BF ( a little more bragging won;t hurt).

For the first time in a long time, I feel safe and cared for and that is a huge thing to miss out on for so long.

And I don't mean the Hummer.

The Blonde is humming a fabulous new beau!!


Hoarse of Course

My sister's voice has gone hoarse screaming at our parents who are on holiday at her house.

I can only chuckle in glee that now my sister gets a bird's eye view of the cookoo's nest that fills my life on a monthly basis.

I am just so happy that my sisters are sharing in the suffering, I don't know what to say.

Accept maybe...


Hah hah Uh HAh

Uh Hah Uhaaa

The Blonde has no words for the joy she feels!!



... is bestowed to those that had friends and family that loved them, and will remember them, and will continue to tell their future generations about them.

Immortality is not physical but it is tangible and it is real.

As I read about the history that made Texas what it is, I am immersed in the reality of immortality. The lives I read about have long been dead but when I read about them and I see the photos; they haven't ceased to exist at all.

My Aunt died several years ago.

I watched her go. I even opened up the hospital window so her soul could leave.

I was afraid she would be trapped.

How silly a thought but I needed to believe that that when I opened that window, her soul flew out just as quickly as her body died.

And I believe that her soul has dispersed into the millions of pieces of energy that will submerse itself back into this world and spread the beauty and joy she was so filled with.

Again, to many this may seem silly, but I need to believe.

As so did Beethoven and everyone else in this world that a loved one leaves behind.

He wrote, "Immortal my beloved"

And no truer words remain.

When your loved...

immortal you shall be.

Fur Sie miene Tante Ullie.

und alle jene Unsterblicher

die Blondine!


70 MPH to Wall

I was driving from Austin to Dallas yesterday. It is a commute that I have not minded to drive because two great things are at each end- my family on one end and my boyfriend on the other.

But lately my car has been a bit scary to drive since the steering rack has been worn down to the point, that when you go around curves, missing grooves in the rack cause the car to free fly for a few seconds before finding the grooves that keeps the car from flying head on into something.

I know that when a curve comes I take it easy, I make sure no cars are around, and I glide on through with a little prayer to the almighty.

But this last time, that prayer was cashed in.

Coming to Dallas on 35E from Austin, a mammoth curve got me. I was helpless to do anything but pray that the car went into the wall instead of the big rig wheels along the other side of my death machine.

The teeth took the last second to catch but not before I scraped into the wall by an inch.

I was literally an inch from my life.

But by sheer grace the car scraped only that inch and the steering grabbed.

I was shaken.

My heart pounding I knew one more curve was coming and I would have to navigate it. It slipped again but caught again in time.

All I remember in my head was praying that it just hold until I get to my BF's house.

Seeing as that is all I prayed for and it was answered, I do not dare ask for much more regarding the steering.

Its in the shop.

God can only answer so many times before bringing his hand down on me and smacking me for being a tight wad and idiot for not getting it repaired. And he would be right to think that way.

I think that way.

Thank God for the man in charge-my BF has initiated the blue law and dealing with the car for me.

Car maintenance is a blue job. Leaving it to a Blonde will just end up in disaster.

I have made it this far on a wing and prayer and a grand man of a beau who is taking care of the car of me.

The Blonde is no longer on a crash course!!


From the Wisdom that is Aretha Franklin

My Lord
I have read this book so many times
But nowhere can i find the page
that change what I experience today

Now I Know that life is meant to be hard
thats how I learn to appreciate my God
Though my courage made me try
I can tell you i won't hide
Because the footprints show you are by my side.

You can lie to a child with a smilin' face
Tell me that color aint about race
You can cast the first stones you can break my bones
But your never gonna break Your never gonna break my Faith

Faith and Hope aint yours to give
Truth and Liberty are mine to Live
You can steal a crown from a king
Break an angels wings
But your never gonna break Your never gonna break my Faith

My Lord
Won't you help them to understand
that when someone takes the life of an innocent man
Well they never really Won because all they've really done
is set the Soul Free where it's supposed to be

For those we lose before their time
I pray their souls will find the light
I know that the day will surely come
When his will, His will, will be done

The Blonde hopes these crazy times don't kill your faith!!

No Good Flea Bag

I have been battling fleas at my parents house. They come from the deer my Mother has been feeding. They hop onto the grass and hit the cats. Even though the cats have been treated for fleas, some still hop on and ride into the house without an invitation.

Rude little fluckers they are!!

And like all uninvited guests, I want to get rid of them as fast as I can.

I went postal on flea kill for the yard, for the house, and for me.

My ankles have been hewed upon for the last time.

I hate to kill the slightest of bugs but when it comes to fleas, I take exception in a big way.

I can whole heartedly say I hate them with true fervor.

No good can come from these pests. Even a cockroach adds to the grand scheme of Mother nature by breaking down dying trees.

But fleas...they are as worthless and inhumane as terrorists!!

I say kill them all!

The Blonde shows no mercy toward petulance!!


If You have Only Nice Things

to blog about than don't bother blogging at all!!

I am stuck in a peculiar place. My love life is actually going completely and utterly sublimely.

I have no complaints.

Nothing to gripe about.

No disparaging thoughts on men.


Its a terrible predicament to be in as a writer.

Happy writers don't blog.

They write romance novels for chrissy's sake.

The Blonde needs a new gripe!!


Blame the Fortune Cookie

Everything was going great at the beach until that one fateful night that we stumbled upon a vietnamese restaurant called 'Hu Dat' and received an almost seemingly mean spirited fortune cookie.

It read:

The greatest danger could be your stupidity.

This was Boo's misfortune and the demise of our surf side vacation.

For the day after he cracked that cookie and read its fortune, he missed the exit road off the beach and drove the car off course until the car was buried nose deep in a sandy abyss.

Before the warm fuzzy feeling of a helping hand, we took upon the task of digging out the car from its beach bed, all the while forgetting to maintain our SPF 85 that had previously saved us from severe burn during surfing. We torched our backs into a hot fuscia frenzy that would test the softness of thread count on our hotel beds. I must say they failed miserably on the count.

The sheets, while soft and cool during the beginning of the trip, had turned against us and turned prickly and rough on our sun raped skin.

Aloe vera after sun care gel became our bed buddy as we woke up several times a night to the sting of our broiled backs and arms.

Our burnt backs limited the comfort zone to a belly only snooze and a very careful application of clothing.

Bras, leather car seats, showers, backs of chairs, sunlight, and sand were avoided with the fiercest of conviction.

The beach was now our enemy.

The ferry rides that were once fun and inviting became an open coffin. Like vampires, we huddled near the middle dark of the vehicle, trying to keep from spontaneously bursting into flames while the engine was shut off during the 5 minute crossing.

Then slowly, the pain subsides, the blisters form, and the willpower to save skin from peel marks quickly succumbs to the morbid satisfaction that we got from the little squirt of fluid we felt under our fingernails as we scraped the tiny skin bubbles.

The endless re-application of lotions, oils, creams, and cocoa butter was and is futile.

The skin has no choice but to peel.

While waiting for our karma to turn, our skin to heal, and our auto to be repaired, we pondered the irony of booking a room, on our last days of holiday, in a hotel located above a vietnamese restaurant.

The Blonde is over asian food!


Dominos on the Beach

The thing I think I love the most about the beach is the sound of the ocean. Its such a large sound that you can rarely fix your thoughts on anything else, even when your world falls a bit.

The second thing I love most about the beach is how the kindness of strangers is beyond anything you will ever get the pleasure of experiencing outside the realm of the surf side communities.

When our car hit soft sand, you can drive on the beaches here in Texland, and lodged itself firmly in place and begged for a rope and a 4X4... we hardly had to look far before a helping hand was reached out to us.

A man unhooked his boat from his truck and pulled us out. We were so grateful and sooo remorseful when he lodged himself in the sand after bailing us out. But yet again, another stranger of kindness came about in a jeep with giant nubby all-terrain tires to pull his truck out. After all that, no one wanted anything more than the feel good that came from 'paying it forward'.

Everyone on the beach has at least once got stuck and had to be pulled out by someone and they seemed more than satisfied just to pay it forward. Exception would be the tow trucks that vulture in on a sand stranded car and offers services in the G range ($1000). But they don't see much action due to the folks with a truck and a kind heart.

The kindness did not stop on the beach.

After we got out of the sand, we drove back to the hotel. On the way, the car burst the coolant hose just as we pulled in for gas. At the gas station, several people offered aid and one of the kind strangers drove us to and from to retrieve a new hose from an auto part store 10 miles up the road. I tried to offer him some small thank you but he refused to take it.

He was just glad to help.

Once we had the hose in place, we were back on the road when only a few miles drive beat our car into submission with a broken belt. We pulled over to let the hell hot engine cool down. Again, several people stopped to offer aid.

We declined thinking we could make it even though majority of opinion was against the odds.

A few minutes later we revved up and tried to engine crawl back to the hotel. The gamble did not pay off and we were teetering on burning out the engine. We spotted a diner and began to pull in when, lo and behold, we spotted a mechanics shop on the next corner. Our car made it the last leg of turmoil road and puttered into the shop just as they were about to close.

The mechanic, who just locked up, re-opened his shop, looked at our car and put us at the front of the line of cars, in the a.m., to have it complete before our noon check out time at our hotel and had a friend pick us up from the shop to drive us back to the hotel 15 miles away.

The car was not ready by noon but that is a story for another day.

All in all, I have to say God was looking out for us. And when I say God, I mean the universe and its energy and how, in some weird way, we are all connected.

We look so often to the sky and a heaven for answers and miracles, when we should just be grateful for the simple gesture of an act of kindness from another human being.

The Blonde likes to connect!

Pics By the Sea


People Have Been Super Nice

to me lately. It makes me wonder what is up.

While I ponder why so many are nice to me this week, I do not have any pondering needed to understand why so many BP execs are receiving mass amounts of environmental fanatics hate mail at this moment.

Because they deserve it!!

I have been twittering some hater tweets myself.

My panties are more than in a ruffled bunch over this disaster that could have been spared had someone not been stingy with safety.

Now, I see they are floating a full page ad in the Statesman to persuade me off my hate.

Not going to happen you douche bags!!

Let's pick the little puppy ad apart and shoot some rebuttal:

I didn't have the stomach to choke down the bull and copy it to my blog so the following is just my take on the BP ad:

We will get it Done. We will make it right.


You will get it done but you will never make it right.

You were never prepared.

Contain and collect the leak but no mention of stopping it. Hmmm....

You brag that you have organized the largest environmental response but you fail to mention the obvious. You created the need for it.

When oil reaches the shore it will be too late.

If wildlife is affected. I hate to tell you but 450 brown pelicans have already died you douches.

Your dedicating $500 million to watch over the environment long-term. Your the last assholes anyone wants watching our marine life and shoreline.

You say efforts wont cost taxpayers but fisherman that are taxpayers will brunt the cost of dead marine life.

And no worries on not letting this happen again. Our criminal justice system has your back on that promise!!


The Blonde is hating!!


Driving to Dallas

or anywhere else for a man beyond my 8 mile preferred radius causes a few of my blonde follicles to cringe a bit.

It has been 3 months and more than enough commuting in my car to see my steady.
I have logged over 4,000 miles to see this man and I'm worried it will bite me in the bum, down the road some day.

I have to think of the car before the man.

My car is old and although solid as a rock, I worry about the accumulated mileage. All I can think of at this moment is what happens after 6 months and thousands of miles later and the whole relationship goes south. I am left with my car and a huge reminder on the dashboard telling me what an idiot I was for sacrificing my vehicles well being for this.

Not to mention the wear and tear on my wheels.

For the moment, its worth it. The guy is great and very accommodating. He is putting in his half as well. Unfortunately my half is part of a lot less than the part his half comes out of.

I am really considering what is in my best interest right now and whether I personally can afford a long distance relationship while going to school and on a tight budget.

After all, its so much less expensive replacing a man than it is an automobile.

On the other hand, finding a great relationship is priceless.

The Blonde is steering herself toward love!


Memorial Day Salute

The Blonde says thanks to all our soldiers!!


Do you know Alone?

Do you really know what alone is?

Its having a really bad day and knowing at the end of it there is no one to say its going to be OK.

Do you know what alone feels like?

It is an ache in your heart that brings you to your knees as you slide down your closed bedroom door to cry before you slither across the floor to an empty bed without enough pillows to warm your worries away.

What is alone?

Alone is begging God to help you because there is no one else to help you.

The Blonde is used to alone!!


Neighborly Not

My neighbor sent my cat to the pound.

I do not know the offense my cat committed but the punishment does not fit the crime.

If my cat was a nuisance than he should have let me know and I would have aided him with a water gun, after a few hits to my cat, would have persuaded him away from the property indefinitely.

But I had know such warning that my cat was a pain to this man, after 2 years of my cat's existence in this neighborhood. It never occurred to me to look in the shelter.

My cat spent five days in the shelter contracting a respiratory illness that is now life threatening.

And for what?!!

What did he do?!!

Is it because my cat is black?

I am force feeding my furry feline lover with a dropper just to keep him alive.

I hate mean people and unfortunately they surround our every peaceful existence and wittingly hurt something weaker than themselves because they are impotent and small and unhappy with the skin life gave them.

I have had some rough times myself but I never go after an innocent party that is unable to defend themselves against the tyranny of passive aggressive behavior.

Shame on you, you rotten human being.

Mr. Vic Yones of Austin, TX.

You cruel and ugly man!!!

The Blonde is wishing for karmic retribution on you!!