10.31.2007

Kreepy Karma

O.K. so its close to Halloween and this is really creepy. My cell phone rang and it showed block caller ID. I let it roll to voice mail and than I checked it.It was some guy who dialed the wrong number, assuming its not a joke, saying he is a patient and needs to talk to someone right away..Mr. Hanson is his name but he left no phone number. The guy sounded like he is about to off himself and had a creepy Stephen Hawkins voice...I'm right to think this is a joke, right? Is this karmic retribution because I upset a muse...hmmm

Hey Mr. Hanson..don't bum a blonde out and die!!

10.30.2007

GroWn Ups in Costume aRe CrEepY

I don't dress up, not to be a bum but because I have seen what y'all look like at the parties. That oil make up on the big old pores and wrinkles and then you drink and then your face smears and..Holy Shiat..you lke Stephen Kings 'It' clown melting in front of my eyes..its not pretty..its down right scary..
You probably scare the dickens out of your own kids coming home all stinkedified in that polyester outfit, twisted up hair wigs that have been dipped more than twice in someone's goblin punch and that melted face paint.
Im scared just thinking about it..this year toss a couple of baby dolls over shoulder tied with string, short t-shirt that doesn't cover your but and boots...there..now your Britney Dam Spears

Now...Stop scaring the blonde!!

10.25.2007

No E

Spell check keeps telling me their isn't an e in blond..There has to be because I keep spelling it that way. I'm pretty sure spell check is wrong..after all what does it know about being Blonde anyway.


B.L.O.N.D.E....blonde..yep..there is an E




Blonde or Blond is still just as blinde!!

10.17.2007

Granola mentality at Whole Foods

I think anything can be taken too far, don't you?

The other morning I was on my way to read a script and stopped at Whole Foods to get a cup of tea. I perused the glass case of saran wrapped egg biscuits under the artificial heat lamp. I watched the workers scurry behind the counter making the coffee and putting the plastic lids on - that every morning probably top the landfill by a couple of inches - not that any of this bothers me much...

What bothers me is the reaction from the chick behind the counter after I asked what she thought was a most absurd question.

"Where is the sweet and low?"

My question was returned with an immediate response that seemed to resonate with a little hostility behind the voice.

"We don't have artificial sweetener. We Have Zillertal!"

Zillertal!!?

Awfully synthetic name for such a natural sweetener wouldn't you say?
"We also have nectar." huffed the counter chick proudly.

I took the Zillertal which by the way is the European equivalent of  Equal - a artificial sweetener dervied from synthetically mastered plant extract.

Give a blonde a break before her morning coffee!!

10.15.2007

Giving Up The Boyfriend

I hated to do it but I had to give him up. I don't like to share my toys...umm...I mean my boys.
Seriously, he was not only a great boyfriend but almost perfect because we enjoyed the same things like boating, tennis, going out dancing, and people watching. 

He loved to show me off--sometimes that was a bit too much. Only we never went out on the weekends and I am not one to go out during the week when I have to work the next morning, so I started to push and finally found out that he wasn't divorced, and the separation was only work related...blah, blah, blah...

The only thing that bothers me, other than the obvious, is how will this affect my karma? I feel horrible that I was unwittingly made an accomplice in someone's cheating....I really did want to keep him, he just wasn't mine to keep.

O.K. that is all your going to have to read about it. I know its a bit heavy for a first blog but what the heck, its the whole reason I started this site. Great way to work it out in a positive fashion, don't you think?