Unattainable Dreams

How many times can I be lead up a mountain, to be shown everything I want and work so hard to get...

"Here, here is your dream, laid out for you. Try to reach out and grab it."

And just as a reach out to grab it with all my might,

A gust of my reality whips up under my feet and thrusts me back down the mountain.

How many times must i be told by the powers that be...

I can't have it, no matter how hard I try.

When do I break?

When do I say...

Enough is enough!

1 year?

5 years?

10 years?

Am I cursed?

If this life is only a lesson to learn from a past life than I am done.

I don't feel it really should continue.

There is karmic retribution for past sins and than there is just fucking abuse by the Gods.

I am going to keep beating down the doors until I have exhausted everything.

But I do feel its totally acceptable to cash in my lessons and move on to another life within 5 years of this one.

Its a date with destiny...

5 years from now on my birthday...if life keeps handing me raw deals...

I will know I tried my hardest and will have no regrets to carry with me in the next life.

Surviving a life is not a life worth living!!

The BLonde will set her own agenda!