I went to the vet to get some sedatives for my feral kitty. He refuses to have anything to do with the cage, no matter how expensive the salmon is.
He is a boy, I peaked under his tail which is a good thing because its only $29 to fix him. Shots are extra. I am waiting on Emancipet to give me the go ahead to bring him in and make him an adoptable catizen.
I am not going to give up on him. I think he would make someone a really great pet.
Hint, Hint!!
Anybody?!
Beuler?!
Someone adopt the kitty pleezzzz!!!
I would keep him but I am dangerously close to becoming Edie from 'Grey Gardens' and I refuse to be anything of the sort.
I am already a horrible bore these days. I study and study and study. I rarely go out unless its for a bottle of wine or cat food.
Oh My Gahh!!
I am Edie!!!
My handsome prince better get his horse in giddy up mode and help turn me back into the fabulous blonde I once was.
No pumpkin necessary!!
The Blonde will not go baldly into the night!!
11.17.2009
11.13.2009
You Can't Swing On Grapevines
but the Mattel 'doll set' couple sitting behind me most certainly tried at the Grove Wine Bar.
I was planning just to sit in the hostess area and wait for my date to arrive but the bartender recognized me from a restaurant I used to go to and asked me what wine I would like. Naturally, I sat down to his hospitality and ordered a little french number.
While I was seated at the bar and staring blankly at the wall, a highly skilled trait of a blonde, the Barbie part of the Mattel couple approached me. She was as plastic as you can get without actually being a doll. She lifted her hand with elbow firmly planted against her body and in a robotic motion waited for me to shake her hand. She blinked a few times and then spoke without someone pulling her strings. It was really quite amazing. I wonder if I can get one for my niece and ship it to her in time for the holidays.
I just need to find a really big box with air holes.
Anyhoo!
In plastic doll speak, she told me she liked my hat. I thanked her and hoped she was on her way to the ladies room to refill the candy in her nose but she just stood there staring at me. Then an awkward moment later, she repeated the hat comment and walked back to her table.
The next minute later, Barbies' Ken comes up to the bar and asks me if someone the seat next to me is taken. I said no but I am waiting for someone.
Ken sat down anyway. I guess plastic ears don;t hear as well as real ones.
It was an innocent enough conversation but after Ken's Barbie tried to prime me, I knew what Ken was up to. I never liked playing Barbie and I thought Ken was gay and I am no Skipper.
I don't swing that way!!
I don't care if you have a pink corvette,
or penthouse
or boat with a blender!!
I just stared at the sports channel focusing on speeding up the clock so my date would arrive now. When he finally arrived ( its seemed like forever) just a minute later, I was super happy, to say the least.
We moved to the dining area with a wall safely dividing us from the Mattel group.
All I could think about is how I would never want to share the man I love with anyone.
The Blonde likes a solo act!!
I was planning just to sit in the hostess area and wait for my date to arrive but the bartender recognized me from a restaurant I used to go to and asked me what wine I would like. Naturally, I sat down to his hospitality and ordered a little french number.
While I was seated at the bar and staring blankly at the wall, a highly skilled trait of a blonde, the Barbie part of the Mattel couple approached me. She was as plastic as you can get without actually being a doll. She lifted her hand with elbow firmly planted against her body and in a robotic motion waited for me to shake her hand. She blinked a few times and then spoke without someone pulling her strings. It was really quite amazing. I wonder if I can get one for my niece and ship it to her in time for the holidays.
I just need to find a really big box with air holes.
Anyhoo!
In plastic doll speak, she told me she liked my hat. I thanked her and hoped she was on her way to the ladies room to refill the candy in her nose but she just stood there staring at me. Then an awkward moment later, she repeated the hat comment and walked back to her table.
The next minute later, Barbies' Ken comes up to the bar and asks me if someone the seat next to me is taken. I said no but I am waiting for someone.
Ken sat down anyway. I guess plastic ears don;t hear as well as real ones.
It was an innocent enough conversation but after Ken's Barbie tried to prime me, I knew what Ken was up to. I never liked playing Barbie and I thought Ken was gay and I am no Skipper.
I don't swing that way!!
I don't care if you have a pink corvette,
or penthouse
or boat with a blender!!
I just stared at the sports channel focusing on speeding up the clock so my date would arrive now. When he finally arrived ( its seemed like forever) just a minute later, I was super happy, to say the least.
We moved to the dining area with a wall safely dividing us from the Mattel group.
All I could think about is how I would never want to share the man I love with anyone.
The Blonde likes a solo act!!
10.28.2009
Do Not Smoosh Bugs
...on your dates leg!!
I had a date in good ole San Antone last night. A pretty night called for margaritas and some
tex-mex on the deck, under a large tree, at this pretty little restaurant on the north end of the city.
Seeing as its almost November and being smack in the middle of fall, it did not occur to me that the last remaining mosquito this season would land on my thigh.
It also did not occur to me that my date would take his hand and smack the mosquito so hard that it would smoosh and stick to my leg. It all happened so fast. I only saw the aftermath when my date lifted his hand.
I am at a restaurant!
I will not scream!
I will not panic
Get it off, get it offf, GET IT OFF!!!
With a quick swipe of the napkin, it was gone but the grossness of the event lingered on throughout dinner. I used half my martini to disinfect my leg and the other half to blur my memory of a dead smooshed bloody thing all over my thigh.
After 3 jalopena and pomegrante martinis, not as bad as you think, I was laughing and almost completely over the bug attack and thinking I might not get some weird new string of swine virus from it when a giant moth landed on the table.
That was all I needed to end the outdoor festivities! Other than that the date went well.
The Blonde doesn't get bugged much!!
I had a date in good ole San Antone last night. A pretty night called for margaritas and some
tex-mex on the deck, under a large tree, at this pretty little restaurant on the north end of the city.
Seeing as its almost November and being smack in the middle of fall, it did not occur to me that the last remaining mosquito this season would land on my thigh.
It also did not occur to me that my date would take his hand and smack the mosquito so hard that it would smoosh and stick to my leg. It all happened so fast. I only saw the aftermath when my date lifted his hand.
I am at a restaurant!
I will not scream!
I will not panic
Get it off, get it offf, GET IT OFF!!!
With a quick swipe of the napkin, it was gone but the grossness of the event lingered on throughout dinner. I used half my martini to disinfect my leg and the other half to blur my memory of a dead smooshed bloody thing all over my thigh.
After 3 jalopena and pomegrante martinis, not as bad as you think, I was laughing and almost completely over the bug attack and thinking I might not get some weird new string of swine virus from it when a giant moth landed on the table.
That was all I needed to end the outdoor festivities! Other than that the date went well.
The Blonde doesn't get bugged much!!
10.23.2009
Waiter, The Check ...Quickly Please
I went out last night with someone who looked about 10 years older and 4 inches shorter than his pictures revealed online. The profile also forgot to mention in the 'about me' section, about him being an old fashion bigot. He actually used the 'N' word three freaking times.
I told him he need to quickly stop with it right there. I should have just left but I am a glutton for punishment and I really wanted my petit filet and King crab legs. Sullivan's is super cheesy but there food is always good.
So I stay and it gets worse.
Oh yes it does!!
It gets fabulously worse.
Old Tex fessed up that he drank a 24 oz can of Coors ( redneck pronunciation: cuurs) driving from Houston to Austin. He had several glasses of wine before I got to the restaurant. He plowed down 4 more glasses of wine at dinner, getting a little nastier and a little more honest about his true nature, which is a natural jerk.
He starts telling me how the twenty somethings will hit on him because he has a house on the lake and big Mercedes Benz. He slurrs some sentences on why he hates pretentious people that have a problem with the 'F' bomb.
Etc...
Etc...
Etc...
As I nudge the waiters to help me round up things at this dinner, he lifts his head from a stuper and tells me he needs to pick up his friends at the airport. I kept asking, "Are you sure you don't want to switch to water or tea. I can make sure its green and not black tea." Ok, I really didn't say the last part but seriously, who says the 'N' word anymore, other than one of my favorite comedians Kat Williams.
I didn't want this dude on the road smashing into an inoccent car. He just kept telling me that he was getting drunker...but he kept drinking.
By the time this disaster ended he could barely walk properly. I left him abruptly on the curb and as I walked by the valets I said, "Grandpa is drunk again."
I just thought to myself the cops at the airport will help him out if he can't drive.
The Blonde is done with dinner dates!
I told him he need to quickly stop with it right there. I should have just left but I am a glutton for punishment and I really wanted my petit filet and King crab legs. Sullivan's is super cheesy but there food is always good.
So I stay and it gets worse.
Oh yes it does!!
It gets fabulously worse.
Old Tex fessed up that he drank a 24 oz can of Coors ( redneck pronunciation: cuurs) driving from Houston to Austin. He had several glasses of wine before I got to the restaurant. He plowed down 4 more glasses of wine at dinner, getting a little nastier and a little more honest about his true nature, which is a natural jerk.
He starts telling me how the twenty somethings will hit on him because he has a house on the lake and big Mercedes Benz. He slurrs some sentences on why he hates pretentious people that have a problem with the 'F' bomb.
Etc...
Etc...
Etc...
As I nudge the waiters to help me round up things at this dinner, he lifts his head from a stuper and tells me he needs to pick up his friends at the airport. I kept asking, "Are you sure you don't want to switch to water or tea. I can make sure its green and not black tea." Ok, I really didn't say the last part but seriously, who says the 'N' word anymore, other than one of my favorite comedians Kat Williams.
I didn't want this dude on the road smashing into an inoccent car. He just kept telling me that he was getting drunker...but he kept drinking.
By the time this disaster ended he could barely walk properly. I left him abruptly on the curb and as I walked by the valets I said, "Grandpa is drunk again."
I just thought to myself the cops at the airport will help him out if he can't drive.
The Blonde is done with dinner dates!
10.22.2009
I Am Still Here
I just have been super busy studying, writing essays for school, and looking for new beaus on a new internet dating site I joined for 30 days. So far, its going very well. Time will tell if I am dealing with more habitual daters but I am feeling positive about it.
I had a great date with my first date. He is a cutey and I had a ball. He is 4 years younger than me, so it looks like I might be wanting to exercise my cougar skills but considering this is about as young as I will go, its not truly a wild at endeavor.
I have drinks tonight with someone and I am working the phone for a few out of towners. I do love to travel, only this time I am hitting mostly the west coast.
Sorry its only a quick note for you but I have to get ready for tonight.
The Blonde is Back to her pursuits!!!
I had a great date with my first date. He is a cutey and I had a ball. He is 4 years younger than me, so it looks like I might be wanting to exercise my cougar skills but considering this is about as young as I will go, its not truly a wild at endeavor.
I have drinks tonight with someone and I am working the phone for a few out of towners. I do love to travel, only this time I am hitting mostly the west coast.
Sorry its only a quick note for you but I have to get ready for tonight.
The Blonde is Back to her pursuits!!!
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