I love men that clearly state what they aren't on internet dating sites. It makes it easier for me to know exactly what they are.
I am not a player!!, he states.
Of course you aren't darling.
Your just relationship challenged.
And, I am not a real Blonde!!
I am actually a brunette who bleaches her hair killing any brain cells that allows me to filter out bull dung!!
I love men and their dungess!!
They can drive a thriving business with a brain fart, but they can't maneauver a simple curve in the road of personal life without driving into a ditch playing with a dumb stick that shifts into high gear with a drop of blood.
Maybe the cure for a dumb Blonde is a shot of the little chrimson to the cerebellum!!
Blondes don't rubberneck an accident waiting to happen!!
10.01.2008
Blonde Moments 293 and 301
Blonde Moment 293
I am on the plane this morning trying to buckle in. The buckle was stuck over a screw down in the seat. I kept tugging apparently a little too close to the guy next to me. After innocently fondling his outer thigh a few times in attempt to get my seat buckle, he kindly removed his Ipod bud from his ear, reached down and grabbed the other end of the belt that was not stuck to the screw.
The other end had the buckle!!
Blonde Moment 301
When getting a 'to go' cup of coffee, I always forget to push back the lid part that covers the sipping hole. After several attempts of looking like a blind fool trying to figure out why the coffee wasn't pouring into my mouth, a kind gentleman said...
"You might want to flip the cover back, makes it easier to drink"
Blondes can't hide their blind spots!!
I am on the plane this morning trying to buckle in. The buckle was stuck over a screw down in the seat. I kept tugging apparently a little too close to the guy next to me. After innocently fondling his outer thigh a few times in attempt to get my seat buckle, he kindly removed his Ipod bud from his ear, reached down and grabbed the other end of the belt that was not stuck to the screw.
The other end had the buckle!!
Blonde Moment 301
When getting a 'to go' cup of coffee, I always forget to push back the lid part that covers the sipping hole. After several attempts of looking like a blind fool trying to figure out why the coffee wasn't pouring into my mouth, a kind gentleman said...
"You might want to flip the cover back, makes it easier to drink"
Blondes can't hide their blind spots!!
9.29.2008
700 Billion Dollars
...should include a little something, something for the Blonde!!
I may not be able to cure the economy but after the party, you will be too hungover and too satisfied to care!!
AirForce One with a Bush Bobblehead saying,
"This way to the party" ...$190 million
Constitutional Sized Margarita machines ...$40 million
Congressional Wiggle Jello Shots..$10 million
Bipartisan DJ's ...$25 million
Giant Strobe Light from NASA ...$435 million
Not remembering where we left the economy...priceless!!
Blondes don't like to bail!!
I may not be able to cure the economy but after the party, you will be too hungover and too satisfied to care!!
AirForce One with a Bush Bobblehead saying,
"This way to the party" ...$190 million
Constitutional Sized Margarita machines ...$40 million
Congressional Wiggle Jello Shots..$10 million
Bipartisan DJ's ...$25 million
Giant Strobe Light from NASA ...$435 million
Not remembering where we left the economy...priceless!!
Blondes don't like to bail!!
9.28.2008
I am not Dead
I am just not posting at the moment. Give me a day to download my new material..
I am a Gay Man in a Woman's Body
Texas Needs Babysitters, Seriously
..and I totally had a wicked Blonde Moment
all yours to read if you stick with me through this writing crisis!!!
Blondes hate being blocked in!!!
I am a Gay Man in a Woman's Body
Texas Needs Babysitters, Seriously
..and I totally had a wicked Blonde Moment
all yours to read if you stick with me through this writing crisis!!!
Blondes hate being blocked in!!!
9.25.2008
No Pay
Craigslist really needs to add a 'No Pay' sub-category to their site.
I know there must be a huge slew of folks wanting to spend their gas money driving to and fro from a job that offers absolutely no benefit except for a pat on the back and all the junk food you can scarf down to help you ruin a girlish figure.
I worked for free on several indie shorts, and in the spirit of paying back the favor, I should offer free advertising on my blog. But really, didn't I already provide them a favor?! We're even!
Unless your an actor or actress, or are an integral part of a lighting crew, or man a camera, or building references; playing PA on a film has no real pay out. You won't work yourself up the corporate ladder making sure the lunch is set.
I could be wrong? The head of MGM just might like the way you slather mayo on his BLT, in one smooth stroke, enough to think you would be an asset in his business development office as a schmoozer.
The jobs that are offered for free aren't ones that warrant any respect nor any tutelage other than what you can gather on your own by standing around and listening from a distance of 20ft. away. Being a lowly PA does not warrant being up close and personal with the director, no matter how unfamous he is or will remain to be.
I learned that even on little sets that produce little movies with little budgets, big heads exist!!
If you really want to learn how films are done, take some classes in film or better yet, hire an excellent crew, who know what they are doing, and just become a Director!
As far as being a PA...from what I know, taking out the trash doesn't do anything for anyone's career unless they are a janitor!!
Blondes are worth every dime!!
I know there must be a huge slew of folks wanting to spend their gas money driving to and fro from a job that offers absolutely no benefit except for a pat on the back and all the junk food you can scarf down to help you ruin a girlish figure.
I worked for free on several indie shorts, and in the spirit of paying back the favor, I should offer free advertising on my blog. But really, didn't I already provide them a favor?! We're even!
Unless your an actor or actress, or are an integral part of a lighting crew, or man a camera, or building references; playing PA on a film has no real pay out. You won't work yourself up the corporate ladder making sure the lunch is set.
I could be wrong? The head of MGM just might like the way you slather mayo on his BLT, in one smooth stroke, enough to think you would be an asset in his business development office as a schmoozer.
The jobs that are offered for free aren't ones that warrant any respect nor any tutelage other than what you can gather on your own by standing around and listening from a distance of 20ft. away. Being a lowly PA does not warrant being up close and personal with the director, no matter how unfamous he is or will remain to be.
I learned that even on little sets that produce little movies with little budgets, big heads exist!!
If you really want to learn how films are done, take some classes in film or better yet, hire an excellent crew, who know what they are doing, and just become a Director!
As far as being a PA...from what I know, taking out the trash doesn't do anything for anyone's career unless they are a janitor!!
Blondes are worth every dime!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)