Harvesting for Harvard

I am 3k shy of my Harvard tuition.

I am about to sell off the last of my life from the pink house.

I have a 20x20 storage unit containing every thing that was not nailed down to my little pink cottage of love.

1200 square feet of inanimate objects that I collected through hard work and loving memories packed away in now what has become a sad and desolate time capsule.

If you open the door to my storage unit, the scent of my old home flows out.

Every rain storm my son and I danced in and dropped our soaked clothes onto the wood floor

Every bubble bath and shower that was taken in our giant claw foot tub that the cat liked to shit behind when she was mad

Every scented candle that was lit after my friends stayed way too long, drinking all my wine, and leaving their cigarette stench behind

Every meal I cooked with no more than 3 ingredients...salt, pepper, and the main one

The smell of detergent I used to wash the sheets and the fresh air they captured while I strung them up on a laundry line outside

These scents are only a whisper to the 70 years of life my house had before I moved in...

Florence, who owned the home before me, bought the house in 1937. She raised a family of 5 children who signed the deed over to me when I bought it.

I bought the house on a hand-shake. On the word of an honest man.

I asked if I should have a paper drawn up to secure the deal and he said, " I just gave you my word little darling. Why do need a piece of paper?"

I said I didn't need one.

I went on his word.

Everyone around me was pushing that I get it in writing.

Everyone around me was not me...

This life is full of takers and I hate most of everyone.

The last time I ever met anyone like me was the family who sold me my pink house.

"The eldest son told me," We have five of us and 10,000 a piece seems fair."

Not one of them argued. Not one thought they were cheated.

I owned that home for 15 years not looking to ever turn a profit.

I wanted the memory of their unselfish deed be a part of my life.

I am sorry I ruined it.

I am sorry I could not hold on to the house.

I am sorry the house has been flipped and turned for money sake.

The pink house deserved more than that. Its history deserved more than that.

My objects were only a brief memory for that house.

But my objects will pay for Harvard and my law degree will go to every living douche who ever thought money was more important than a life, a home, a history!!

The Blonde will legally whittle down the greedy!

Sharing some vintage, primo momentos or is it momentoes? I need to ask Gore. Is he still alive?

Creepy dude....can;t remember who he is. But apparently I was pissed at him.

How dare this prick think I would have anything to do with him?

You know what pisses me off?

The fact that men who make money think women who don't make money are their playground for sexual deficiency.

This is the un-so suave romantic introduction from a very misguided, unhappily married twit:

Hey Veronica,
Stumbled across your Myspace page......
What a gorgeous, sexy lady....Yummy!.......
Not sure this will work for you, but here goes......
Me; 51 attorney in Austin-- Freetime during the days. Work downtown 6' 180 blond blue. Athletic build. Smart and fun. Dynamic and erotic. Confident and witty. Married....hey, at least I am honest! ....
I want a lady that can generate an intense mental and physical connection, a lady that is hot, mentally and physicially, for lust, passion and total body craving gotta-have-it sex on a recurring basis... ..
Interested???....


Not even the grace to spell check...

Asshole

The Blonde will shoot you down!

---Damn, I was pissed when I was alive. I like being undead. It seems so much better from my live life. Why was I so pathetic? jeezzz iz...


Sorry, no real God or son of God when your undead...

The Blonde is just trying to relate.;(

UnHoly Hell of a Funny

Spoiler alert..you will be totally offended if you have any religious affiliation!!

The Blonde is free from judgement!

Corrupt Your Kindle

Blinded By Blonde is now on Kindle

Follow the Kindle link and....

Help feed a Blonde!!!

Holy How

Did I miss that it is Easter this weekend? A blonde moment yes but I have disclaimers to go with it.

1. I don't have kids the age of reminding me about a giant bunny that hides eggs.

2. I am not Jewish, and although my friend is and reminded me of his big holiday,
I just thought Passover came before Easter like Hanuka and Christmas

3. I don't watch television and so I missed the Cadbury ads that shoves an egg up a bunnies ass just to plop it out for the big event. And if that is not embarrassing enough for the bunny...they totally kill its dignity with making it sound like a chicken.

The only good thing I can say is I am following the guidelines of Good Friday by not eating meat. And that is just a fluke really since I am into living a little healthier and meat has been off my menu for a while.

All in All, I wish everyone a fun 4 day weekend no matter what the occasion is.

The Blonde blesses the sanctity of a long weekend!