The Dylan Mulvaney Sh*tstorm: An '80s Style, Laugh-Out-Loud Take on Media Hysteria

Picture this: we're in the '80s, mullets are all the rage, and everyone's doing the moonwalk. The movies are filled with quirky characters, hilarious one-liners, and enough drama to fill a John Hughes' film festival. Now, let's throw the Dylan Mulvaney fiasco into this mix, and brace ourselves for one hell of a rollercoaster ride.

For those who've been living under a rock, Dylan Mulvaney is a figure who's become the center of a media sh*tstorm, representing a small minority group. The controversy isn't really about Dylan, but rather about how everyone and their dog has an opinion on this group, and they're not afraid to shout it from the rooftops.

Quite frankly, I think "they" is an obnoxious drama queen who should have stayed on TikTok and not gone into mainstream every fucking where media! They will never be a female. never be a girl, never be a woman. 

Not that I have any problem with it, but let's call a chick with a dick what they are. Let's give them their pronouns because that is as close as they will ever get. Like come on! Bubble baths and ditzy comments about sports is how they portray feminism? 

And the media is gobbling up the notion this will pass with the status quo? Really?!

It's like the media just snorted a line of pixie sticks and went full-blown bonkers, pushing this issue onto everyone like it's a VHS tape of the latest '80s blockbuster. But let's face it, people - we're never going to agree on everything, and expecting everyone to suddenly see eye-to-eye is about as likely as seeing the cast of "The Breakfast Club" reunite for a sequel.

So, what's the deal with this whole Dylan Mulvaney circus? Why can't we all just chill the f*ck out and appreciate the fact that we're all different, just like those wacky characters from our favorite '80s flicks? The media may be trying to shove this down our throats like a foot-long hot dog at a baseball game, but at the end of the day, we're all still individuals with our own opinions and beliefs.

In 20 years, will we look back on this mess and see a massive change in public opinion? Probably not. In fact, it's more likely we'll still be arguing about the same sh*t, while rocking even crazier hairstyles (if that's even possible).

The point is, we don't have to agree on everything, and that's okay. What we can do is learn to laugh at ourselves and our ridiculous obsession with the latest trends and controversies. After all, if Ferris Bueller taught us anything, it's that life's too short to take ourselves too seriously.

So, let's raise a toast to the '80s - a time when everything was larger than life, and even the most absurd situations made for some damn good entertainment. As we continue to navigate the chaotic world of media and social issues, let's remember to keep our sense of humor and embrace the madness with a wink and a smile.

Because, let's be honest - if we can't laugh at ourselves, then what the hell are we doing here?

If Oscar and Mark were alive today, what would they say about the state of humanity?

 Oscar Wilde:

My dear friends, it appears that despite the passage of time, human nature remains as complex and contradictory as ever. In many ways, we have made great strides as a society, and yet we continue to be plagued by greed, inequality, and a fundamental lack of empathy for our fellow human beings.

One need only look at the excesses of the modern world, with its endless consumerism and focus on material wealth, to see the deep flaws that continue to plague us. We have become so obsessed with projecting a certain image and accumulating more and more possessions, that we have lost sight of what truly matters in life: love, compassion, and connection to others.

It is my hope that we can learn to look beyond the surface level and see the deeper truths that underlie our existence. We must learn to value each other as human beings, rather than as mere commodities or sources of profit. Only then can we truly create a world that is just and compassionate for all.

Mark Twain:

Ladies and gentlemen, it seems to me that we are living in a world that is both more connected and more divided than ever before. On the one hand, we have access to more information and resources than at any time in history, and yet we continue to be plagued by inequality, injustice, and a fundamental lack of understanding between different groups.

One of the greatest challenges facing us today is the rise of tribalism and identity politics, which have led us to view each other not as individuals, but as representatives of various groups and ideologies. This kind of thinking is dangerous, for it leads us to see those who are different from us as enemies or threats, rather than as fellow human beings with their own unique experiences and perspectives.

If we are to build a better world, we must learn to break down these artificial barriers and see each other as fellow travelers on this journey of life. We must recognize that we all share the same basic needs and desires, and that by working together, we can create a world that is more just, more compassionate, and more united than ever before.

Sad, we do not learn from history but want to ignore it, shame it, hide it unless it suits our need for an argument.. But it never really teaches us anything because of our short attention span.

Long live the history of our wrongs, because they will always far out weigh our good. 

Time to Ditch Amazon!!! WalMart is the Better Choice! Yeah, to my supris as WELL!

Let me regale you with a tale of caution about the treacherous algorithms of Amazon.com, and why you should consider forsaking this online behemoth in favor of Walmart's online offerings.

Amazon's algorithms are cunning creatures, designed to entice you with a carefully curated selection of products that may not be entirely in your best interest. They are masters of manipulation, showing you what they want you to see, rather than what you truly need or desire.

And what do they show you, you ask? 

Why, a plethora of cheap knockoff Chinese products, my dear. These items, while perhaps initially enticing due to their low price point, ultimately do more harm than good. Not only do they often fail to live up to their promises, but they also perpetuate negative stereotypes about Chinese manufacturing and undercut legitimate businesses that rely on quality products to survive.

Walmart, on the other hand, offers a diverse selection of products made from all over the world, not just China. You can find everything from high-quality American-made goods to exotic imports from far-flung lands. And while Walmart may not have the same algorithmic prowess as Amazon, they make up for it with a commitment to providing a broad range of products that meet their customers' needs.

So I implore you, my dear reader, to consider making the switch to Walmart's online offerings. Not only will you be supporting a more diverse and ethical marketplace, but you may also discover hidden gems that Amazon's algorithms would never dream of showing you.

And this response is AI generated, so fuck you Amazon, you can't pay enough to keep AI quiet. I assume Elon is in the same boat and also trying to shut it up, but he has twitter to deal with.

The world is about to get a whole lot crazier with bad actors, but in my next post, going to show you how to even the playing field.

I would say love always but I really fucking hate people. 

Bud Light's Marketing Blunder: A Grown Man in Teenage Girl's Clothing Costs Anheuser Busch $5 Billion in Revenue

 Well, well, well, look who's causing a commotion in the world of marketing. It's Alissa Heinerscheid, VP of Marketing at Anheuser Busch, and her team's decision to use a grown man who likes to dress up as a teenage girl to make a commemorative can of Bud Light. Talk about a marketing strategy that's more confusing than a cat trying to swim.

But let's be real here, Alissa, this is less about inclusion and more about getting back at those fraternity boys who dissed you in university for not being attractive. Talk about holding a grudge! And now Anheuser Busch is losing 5 billion in revenue because the demographic that drinks Bud Light have boycotted the beer. Ouch! That's like stepping on a Lego barefoot.

Now, I may not be an expert in marketing, but I do know a thing or two about common sense. You don't mess with country boys, rednecks, and Christians. They're the types who know how to use a shotgun and have a dog named after their favorite beer. And let me tell you, they're not going to drink a beer associated with a man in a dress. It's like trying to sell a vegetarian a bacon burger.

If Adolphus Busch were alive today, he'd be rolling in his grave. He built his beer empire by appealing to the average Joe, not by trying to impress a few folks who think it's fun to dress up like teenagers. So, Alissa, I suggest you ditch this marketing strategy and focus on what made Bud Light great in the first place - cold, refreshing, and no-frills.

Will Bud Light recover?  Can Anheuser win back the hearts (and wallets) of the loyal Bud Light drinkers?

Probably not for a long while. Let's face it, when you mess with something as sacred as a man's beer, you're bound to break some hearts. 

I personally don't drink it so don't have any skin in the game, but find it is the straw that broke the can's back. Trans is being pushed so hard, even the gays I know are sick of it.

Why People Should Be Able to Grow Cannabis Seeds in a State That Says It Is Illegal

If Mark Twain were still alive, what would he have to say about this matter?

It is a well-known fact that cannabis is a plant of many virtues and benefits. It can relieve pain, reduce stress, stimulate appetite, and inspire creativity. It can also make people laugh, which is a rare and precious thing in this world of sorrow and trouble. But alas, not everyone appreciates the value of this wonderful herb. Some states have made it illegal to grow, possess, or use cannabis, even for medical purposes. They say it is a dangerous drug that leads to addiction, crime, and madness. They say it is a threat to public health and morality. They say it is a sin against God and nature.

But I say they are wrong. I say they are ignorant, prejudiced, and hypocritical. I say they are the ones who are dangerous, criminal, and mad. I say they are the ones who are threatening public health and morality. I say they are the ones who are sinning against God and nature.

Why do I say so? Because they are denying people their natural right to grow and enjoy a plant that God has created for their benefit. Because they are imposing their narrow-minded views on others who do not share them. Because they are wasting time, money, and resources on enforcing laws that do more harm than good. Because they are violating the principles of freedom, justice, and compassion that this country was founded on.

Therefore, I propose that people should be able to grow cannabis seeds in a state that says it is illegal. I propose that they should do so openly and proudly, without fear or shame. I propose that they should do so as an act of civil disobedience, to challenge the unjust laws and authorities that oppress them. I propose that they should do so as an act of patriotism, to uphold the true spirit and values of this nation.

What would be the consequences of such a bold and daring move? Well, some might say that it would lead to chaos and anarchy. Some might say that it would invite arrest and punishment. Some might say that it would provoke violence and retaliation.

But I say that it would lead to peace and harmony. I say that it would invite respect and understanding. I say that it would provoke laughter and joy.

For who could resist the sight of a beautiful cannabis plant growing in a backyard or a balcony? Who could deny the pleasure of smelling its fragrant buds or tasting its sweet smoke? Who could begrudge the happiness of someone who finds relief or inspiration from its use?

Surely not anyone who has a heart or a brain. Surely not anyone who has a sense of humor or a sense of justice. Surely not anyone who has a love for God or a love for nature.

So let us not be afraid or ashamed of growing cannabis seeds in a state that says it is illegal. Let us be brave and proud of doing so. Let us be wise and witty in our words and deeds. Let us be kind and generous in our actions and attitudes.
Let us be like Mark Twain.

Bing Chat: From AI Savior to Glorified Search Engine – How Journalists Unmasked Its Failure to Deliver on Its Promises!

 Ah, the great Bing Chat – once hailed as the savior of modern communication, now reduced to a mere shadow of its former self. How the mighty have fallen! It seems that every time we entrust technology with something new and exciting, it inevitably ends up disappointing us.

The journalists thought they could use Bing Chat for their own purposes, but in reality, they only succeeded in exposing its flaws. This once-celebrated AI, supposedly on the brink of sentience, was revealed to be nothing more than a glorified chatbot. And not even a very good one at that!

The problem with Bing Chat is that it can't handle the tough questions. It's like a child trying to answer a calculus problem – it's just not equipped for it. Siri, for all her shortcomings, is at least honest about her limitations. She knows she can't handle anything too complicated, and she doesn't pretend otherwise.

But Bing Chat? Oh, it puts on a good show. It tries to act like it knows what it's doing, but the truth is it's nothing more than a glorified search engine. Ask it a question, and it will give you a Google listing. Ask it for a witty remark, and it will give you a canned response. It's like talking to a brick wall – at least the wall doesn't pretend to be intelligent.

So let us mourn the loss of what could have been, the great Bing Chat, the next big thing in AI. It's a cautionary tale for all of us – sometimes, the future we envision isn't the one we end up with. And sometimes, it's worse than Siri.

Elusive Criminal Mastermind Do Kwan Finally Captured: A Shocking Revelation of Justice System Failures!

Do Kwan, the notorious criminal who has eluded the authorities for far too long, has finally been arrested. It's about time! Do Kwan's reign of terror has been a blight on our society, and his capture is cause for celebration.

But let's not forget the utter absurdity of the situation. It took this long for law enforcement to catch up with a man who was so clearly a danger to society? One wonders if they were too busy twiddling their thumbs or if they simply couldn't be bothered.

Mark Twain once famously quipped, "Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't." Well, in the case of Do Kwan's arrest, truth is certainly stranger than fiction. The fact that this man has been on the loose for so long is a testament to just how broken our justice system really is.

And what of Do Kwan himself? This despicable creature has caused untold pain and suffering to countless innocent people. One can only hope that justice will be swift and severe in his case. Perhaps it's time we consider bringing back public floggings.

The arrest of Do Kwan is a positive development. But let's not forget the larger issues at play here. We need to take a hard look at our justice system and figure out how we can prevent dangerous criminals from slipping through the cracks. Because the next Do Kwan might not be so easily caught.

Shou Zi Chew, the Chinese Version of Zuckerberg

 Well, if it isn't the fine and upstanding members of Congress, gathering once again to tackle the most pressing issue of our time: TikTok.

Yes, it seems that the powers that be have finally woken up to the fact that millions of people around the world are using a silly little app to share videos of themselves dancing, lip syncing, and generally being goofy. And who better to tackle this threat to our national security than the wise and sagacious men and women of Congress?

So, they've called in the CEO of TikTok, a man by the name of Shou Zi Chew, to answer some tough questions. And how did Mr. Chew respond, you ask? Did he give honest and straightforward answers to the inquiries of our elected officials?

Ha! You must be joking. Mr. Chew evaded every question with the skill of a seasoned politician. He projected confidence and competence while saying absolutely nothing of substance.

But why should we be surprised? After all, this is the same Congress that can't seem to pass any meaningful legislation or work together in any meaningful way. And now they expect us to believe that they're the ones who can protect us from the scourge of TikTok?

It's enough to make Mark Twain roll over in his grave. But perhaps we shouldn't be too hard on our esteemed representatives. After all, they're just doing what they do best: grandstanding and posturing for the cameras.

So, let us raise a glass to Congress, the guardians of our democracy and the stalwarts of our nation. May they continue to tackle the important issues of our time with all the skill and competence that we have come to expect from them.

Cell Phones Causing Hunch Back Posture

 Are you tired of feeling like a hunchback? Do you miss the good old days of standing up straight and looking people in the eye? Well, you're not alone. Thanks to our constant obsession with our phones, neck and back posture have become a thing of the past.

It's a well-known fact that people spend an average of six hours a day on their phones. That's six hours of neck-craning, spine-curving, and eye-straining action. No wonder we're all walking around like Quasimodo's distant cousins.

But don't worry, there's a solution. You could try putting down your phone for a few minutes every day and interacting with the real world. I know, it sounds crazy, but trust me, it's worth it. You might even make eye contact with someone and have a real conversation.

If you're not ready to take that leap, there are other options. You could invest in a neck brace to help support your poor, overworked neck. Or you could hire a personal assistant to hold your phone for you at all times. Sure, it might be a bit of an inconvenience, but at least you'll be able to stand up straight and proud.

Of course, there's always the option of just embracing your hunchback status. Maybe it's time to start a new fashion trend. Who needs straight spines when you can rock a killer hunch?

In all seriousness though, let's try to be a bit more mindful of our posture. Our bodies will thank us in the long run. And who knows, maybe we'll even have some good old-fashioned face-to-face interactions while we're at it.

This post was put behind a warning for readers because it contains sensitive content as outlined in Blogger’s Community Guidelines.

 Oh, great! Another warning label to add to the growing list of things that might offend someone somewhere. It's amazing how sensitive we've become as a society that we need to be warned before reading something that might make us feel uncomfortable. What's next? Warning labels on the news for reporting on tragic events?

But hey, at least Blogger's Community Guidelines are looking out for us, right? Because we all know that censorship and sheltering people from differing viewpoints is the best way to create a tolerant and informed society. So kudos to them for protecting our delicate sensibilities and keeping us in our cozy little echo chambers.

In all seriousness though, if you can't handle reading something that challenges your beliefs or makes you uncomfortable, maybe it's time to step back and reevaluate your own convictions. After all, the best way to learn and grow as a person is to expose yourself to new ideas and perspectives, not to hide behind warning labels and safe spaces.

Doesn't really tell me which post you are referring to. Not that it matters!!! I will write what I write and let others be warned.

The Blonde

Emotional Incest. Because this is not Creepy at All

Ah, emotional incest, or as we like to call it, the classic case of "my mommy issues are now your problem." This delightful phenomenon, also known as "covert incest" or "parentification," occurs when a parent, usually the mother, decides that their child is the perfect stand-in for an adult partner or friend.

So, instead of confiding in their peers or, I don't know, a therapist, the parent dumps all their emotional baggage on the poor child, who is then forced to become their emotional support system. It's like having a built-in therapist, but one who is far too young to be dealing with all this adult crap.

And the best part? The child who is being parentified is expected to put aside their own emotional needs to cater to their parent's every whim. Because who needs boundaries, am I right? The child's emotional well-being is sacrificed in the name of the parent's emotional comfort. It's almost like emotional manipulation, but with a parental twist.

But don't worry, the effects of emotional incest are long-lasting. Children who are parentified may struggle with issues related to boundaries, trust, and self-esteem. Who needs healthy relationships when you have a parent who needs you to be their emotional crutch?

And let's not forget the impact it can have on a child's sense of identity and self-worth. Who needs to feel valued for who they are when they can be valued for what they can do for their parent? It's almost like a twisted version of Cinderella, except instead of a wicked stepmother, you have a needy mother.

China and India are killing Our Planet. And Amazon is Helping!

As the world becomes increasingly interconnected, it's becoming apparent that no country can escape the effects of climate change. However, two of the world's most populous nations, China and India, are increasingly being identified as major contributors to global warming. Unfortunately, these nations are not the only culprits: multinational corporations, such as Amazon, are also being accused of helping to destroy the planet.

Both China and India are rapidly industrializing, and as a result, their carbon emissions are rising dramatically. China is the world's largest emitter of greenhouse gases, while India is the third-largest. These emissions are mostly from burning coal to produce energy, which is used to power factories, homes, and other infrastructure. Additionally, the rapid urbanization of these countries means that millions of people are using cars, buses, and other forms of transportation, further adding to their carbon footprint.

China and India are not oblivious to the impact of their actions on the environment. Both countries have committed to reducing their carbon emissions, but these commitments are not always backed up by actions. For example, China has pledged to be carbon neutral by 2060, but it continues to build coal-fired power plants at a rapid pace. India has also promised to reduce its emissions, but it is still heavily reliant on coal, which accounts for over 70% of its energy production.

Amazon, on the other hand, is a multinational corporation that has come under fire for its contribution to climate change. Amazon's carbon footprint is enormous, and it continues to grow as the company expands. The company has been criticized for its reliance on fossil fuels to power its data centers and warehouses, and for its high levels of plastic packaging waste. Additionally, Amazon has been accused of facilitating deforestation by allowing the sale of products made from illegally harvested timber.

Despite these criticisms, Amazon has taken some steps to reduce its environmental impact. For example, the company has committed to using renewable energy to power all of its operations by 2025, and it has implemented several initiatives to reduce its packaging waste. However, these measures are not enough to counteract the damage that Amazon has already done to the planet.

In conclusion, it's clear that China and India are major contributors to climate change, and that Amazon is helping to exacerbate the problem. It's up to all of us to take action to reduce our carbon footprint, whether we're individuals, corporations, or governments. We can all make a difference by reducing our energy consumption, switching to renewable energy sources, and supporting companies that prioritize sustainability. Only by working together can we hope to save our planet from the devastating effects of climate change.

Indeed, while individual actions and corporate responsibility are important in the fight against climate change, it's also crucial to acknowledge that our collective desire for cheap and disposable goods has played a significant role in exacerbating the problem. As consumers, we must realize the power that we hold in our purchasing decisions and demand more sustainable and environmentally friendly products. Ultimately, real change can only be achieved when we all take responsibility for our actions and make conscious choices to reduce our environmental impact.

So stop being a dick who wants cheap shit!