I am at a Crossroad

I have reached that point in life where I no longer look outward but inward. My life is nothing more than introspection right now. This thought only comes from the feeling that I am missing something.

I used to fill that feeling of missing something by searching for a man but that never seemed to pan out and got only worse the more I searched online.

I sometimes blame the internet dating sites for killing my dream of love.

And that sometimes thought is a reaffirmed every time I make the mistake of trying it again.

I no I said I would quit and I have.

I believe I should start a dating anonymous 12 step program for people who were suckered into the thought that anyone on those sites were worthy of true commitment.

A 12 step program for the hopeless romantic that was disenfranchised and lost self esteem due to disgusting displays of worth based on nothing more than superficiality.

I have been sober from dating sites for more than a year and the next few stories you will read are offered to you as a warning.

Get sober and boycott match.com and other dating sites.

Let us start a grass roots movement to kill online dating and get back to the fundamentals of courting.

The Blonde wants Match to loose their game!!!

My Dating Profile

About Me

I am just signing in to look at the fish bowl so I am using lyrics for my 100 word quota

Now tell me, how's
life in the big city?

I hear the competition's
tough, baby that's a pity
And every man's an actor
every girl is pretty
I don't like what's
getting back to me


I am not a hypocrite nor a manipulatist...if I say I am never going to meet you..than I am never going to meet you.
if you want to banter online for a bit, fine, but other than that...forget me!

First Date

don't want one...using this site purely for late night entertainment when I can not sleep and too tired to read a book.

Thank you, Thank you for supplying me smiles and laughs before I sleep.

I love fiction and short stories and my favorite author is Roald Dahl.

I can read 20 profiles on this site and see the tragedy all wrapped up in less than a paragraph.....its brilliant and Roald Dahl would love this....


BRAVO!

 

How sad is it to report the Blonde is getting replies?

Long Time Coming

In the grand tradition of divas like Cher, Barbara Streisand, and Brett Favre, I have decided to come back from the dead for one more show.

I am going back to the original Veronica Bell and the tradition of bad dates and dysfunctional relationships and other stories in between.

So let's start this revival party off with a big bang and talk about Martha Stewart's stint on Match.com. I personally believe it is a stunt to help promote her nephew-in-laws new book, "Love in the age of Algorythms" but if she does go through a few of the dating motions, I can't wait for her own book.

Being famous should put a whole new spin on the dating algorithms.

And at a ripe old age of 71, the pickings should be more than slim since most men her age that use online dating are only interested in younger models. Her money and fame should pull out a lot of men willing to be her bitch and that is the part of the book I will be most interested in.

The Blonde has signed up for a second tour of blog duty!!

HOO-RAH!

Ladies And Gentlemen

I regret to inform you that Veronica Bell kicked the stand right out of the cycle of life and fell into a new abyss

at

August 7

8:47 AM 

Bye, Bye

Blondie

Humpty Dumpty

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again


I sit not funny that I think of myself as the egg...and that I think of Augusto as Puss in Boots...

I am watching the children's movie and its ridiculous how comical the level of reality it portrays of me and my Augusto!

I am almost ready to tattoo Humpty Dumpty on my neck and Puss and Boots on my tail bone.

Life mimics art.
Art mimics life.

Who knows any more?



I only ever truly loved a few men....

and if I had to choose among them....I could not....

The Blonde has only memories now!

She will not waste them on the bad ones!
 

I Am Weary

I am about to snap under the pressure of it all. Not snap in the way of doing anything crazy...just snap..

into an OOPS again kind of, sort of, way!!

Only those who have been through it, know what I am talking about.

I was going to lay down quietly and die off and be the internet martyr for all the tyranny we live under because of the 1%.

I watched a show about the billions of dollars, IN CASH, sent to Iraq...and no surprise it all disappeared.

Name blaming. Finger pointing. And pretending they are working hard at finding it when we know they are getting paid more to not find what happened to it.

I am still sick and the cost of care is beyond reproach. I have looked into medical tours offered by Costa Rica. And quite frankly, I would rather my money go to a country that is number one in environmental responsibility.

I am after all a fighter.

On the internet and in real life.

I could lay down but that would make it easy for Mitt Romney and the right wing Republicans.

So deal with us poor and ill you fucks!!!


Cuz the Texas Blonde  ain't in her grave yet!!!

Actually she is, sort of...this is an old post I found locked up in blogger limbo like my life.

I assume the politicians have changed but not the politics.

Who ever gives a shit about poor folk?

Selfish People

Selfish people will not help anyone that might be a blip in their harmonious lives.

They buy new cars, add a pool to their backyard and call their family only when they are bored and need to kill time while they drive to their destinations.

And they consider this being attentive to their family. And at the end, they will hold out their hand and expect their part of the pie in the will.

And not once do they acknowledge the depth of commitment and care that another family member provides.

Why would they?


They have never stuck around long enough to witness what extent that person goes through to care for family.

They are happily oblivious to the nature of care that is needed until the very end. They will come rushing up against the side of the death bed and  boo hoo...

And that will satisfy their guilt when the will is read.





Selfish greedy people make the Blonde deathly ill.

Our Oceans Are Full of Buried Treasure

Apparently I do not have to go off to international waters. I just need to be 3 miles off shore and weighted properly to sink in 600 ft of water. And no funeral director is required. No casket is required. Just a dead body with a toe tag and some decent cement shoes.

Bonus for me on the charter boat and and dingy mark. I can just wait to die on the boat and be dropped mafia style 600 ft below.

Please God let it not be off the shores of the ugliest beach in the world known as the Gulf Coast.

YeeHaa!!

The Blonde is resting at peace right now because she saved a bundle on burial costs!

A Big Year

It can all be yours one day but you have to fight for it.


The Blonde hopes you get it all!!!

New Found Respect For Dreads

I do not have the dedication nor patience to deal with dreadlocks. After spending hours waxing and teasing spirals in my hair, I have determined its a look best served surf side.

If I was at the beach with my puka shell choker, bikini, and surfboard...it would look hot.

But in the real world....dreads need to be nurtured and maintained beyond anything my blonde hair has ever known.

Who can sleep with waxed, teased hair under pantyhose at night until its sets. It takes 6 months to set.

I have yet to get all the tangle out and I have washed my hair several times.

Its not a big deal since I am not on a regiment of outings other than to the local grocery to buy canned cat food for my cats. You can be sick and the cats have no sympathy for you if their food bowl is not filled with scrumptious canned delicacy of mystery meat early in the morning and dinner time.

While my hair de-tangles I have been looking at burial options.

If you thought dying was expensive, death is even more so.

I have found Cosco supplies an assortment of coffins in the $300 range. But family will still have to pay for the morgue, mortuary, embalming, grave site...etc....


Its a business you might want to consider because its truly a money maker.

I say coffin but the politer term is casket.

Either semantic still does not help the residual cost of burial.
I could cremate but it is as expensive as embalming. But Cosco does offer a discount ash jar too.

For half the price, I can charter a boat with a dingy into international waters. The boat will leave me floating in a dingy and I will margaritaville it until death kicks in and I can give myself a Vikings Funeral without any cost of body claim.

Either way, I want to thank the Republicans for stopping Obamacare before I finish law school. They will save me the student loan repay they hiked the interest rate up on.

The Blonde is locking in her early demise as cheaply as she can!

Dreadlocks

I am having a good day today.

I can;t do much but I can sit and watch old movies and twist my hair with wax and make dreadlocks.

I always wanted dreadlocks but I was so busy being what everyone wnated me to be or what I needed to be to get someone to like me that I never really got to do the things that made me....


ME...


I have been at it for 5 hours now.

Its tiring to hold up your arms and twist and tease and wax an inch of your hair at a time.

And its a shame I won't see the locks as they should be since it takes 6 months to a year to truly tighten but I like it.

I wish I did it when I had the chance to show them off.


When my friend and I get busy on my obit, it will not be a glowing review of a fearless life.

The worst thing about my life is knowing I was not brave.

I must have held a great act for many years because if you ask people who knew me...they would say I was 'intimidating'.

I must have been a great actor. Too bad I could not win an Oscar for my performance.


I do not believe n heaven and hell.

I believe in reincarnation.

I know I am headed to a new life and I only hope that in my next life...glimpses of this one will show up in my dreams.

I want a window to see my family.

I want a worm hole to come back if my son needs me.

I will not be buried.

I will not be cremated.

I am leaving soon on my own and will just fabulously disappear.

And if you ever wonder where I went...just look in the direction of the ocean when its a full moon.


The Blonde will be headed to Jamaica in her dreams!

After Midnight

And the 4th of July is over.

I did not want to take away the celebration with my silly thoughts.

But, my blog is my savior because I have no one I trust to talk to.

My blog and animals are the only things I believe in these days; exception being my son but I would never burden him with more than he needs to know.

He has his own life to live and I will never make him my crutch.

I really hate parents that lean on children. We should be their rock; not the other way around.


Anyhoo,

I am leaving soon.

And I want to get as much random shit in as I can.



I will have to leave behind my cats, my son, my things, my life.

I am going somewhere new and I am going alone.

And I am angry that everyone else gets to stay here.

I want to stay here but I know I have to go.


Its fate.

And its time.


My path is paved and I was silly to think I could change it.

I am going where I am supposed to go.

I was hoping to stay but no matter what I tried...

it was never going to be.

Life is 80% your deal

and fate owning the other 20% of what yu wish you could deal with better.

But alas..

NO

FATE has no math skills and its a stubborn bitch who wins just because...


AND...

Understanding fate owns you ass even if you busted it to get away causes some ripple that will cause you to be mean to everyone.

And everyone your mean..totally deserves it!



On the fuller side of the empty glass....




Its funny who I think about these days.

I think about all the famous guys I never went to bed with but had the opportunity to.

I think about all the guys I did go to bed with but had the opportunity to say no.



I never slept with anyone I truly was in love with.



I never had that courage.


I know why the men I dated treated me the way that they did.

I would have done the same.

That is why I push them to find real love and know they never will.

We are drawn to the same species.


The Blonde is specie catagoria...Damagia Brokentalia