9.12.2008

I Walk the Line

Oh, I walked more than my share of the line alright.

I walked my toes off in New York City and I ran my bum off in Central Park. Each time walking and running twice as far to get back to my original destination because I got lost most of the time. I would use the subway, go in the wrong direction, and have to walk back and start over.

And what did I get for all my walking and running?

2 pounds!!!

2 freaking pounds added to my body!!

The same thing happened to me in Heidelberg, Germany!!

I walked up the northern part of the Königstuhl hillside three times for three different men and I gained three pounds. They too have a train system, but my bubbled up blonde brain couldn't grasp the german language enough to read the signs correctly and not accidentally end up on the other side of communism.

You think walking up and down Manhattan, schlepping shopping bags, and my gigantic hobo would have widdled my body down to wafe like status, especially when I was careful to starve myself to death for the fashion shows. Not that I am ever going to be thin enough to be blown down by air but I wouldn't mind being thin enough for a strong wind to shove me to the ground.

I blame men!

I would have stuck to the stravation plan, and come back the size of a snap pea,
if it were not for men.

They took me to fabulous places, with fabulous food, and wonderful wines!!

What are they thinking?!

Men?!


Blondes can't live without them!!

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