4.06.2008

My Brain is falling, My brain is falling

The more I write about being blonde the more I think I am becoming...well...blonde!!

I recently took my quarterly IQ test and have found I dropped another four points. I am now 12 points away from MENSA.

They say if you don't use it, you lose it.

I thought they were talking about organs pertaining to sex. I am fairly certain now, they were referring to one's mind. Of course they do say the most erogenous part of a women's body is the hypothalamus but we aren't talking about the part of the brain that needs only fresh batteries in a vibrator to stimulate a response.

I am speaking about the part of my brain that can't finish reading a chapter of Moby Dick without daydreaming every other paragraph. Of course it could just be I don't care about fishing for a giant white whale but I should still be able to focus on at least one page of dialogue.

I used to spend hours at my computer as a white hat. Now, I couldn't hack my way out of a paper bag. Instead of writing code, I write blonde anecdotes. I used to write dissertations on ontology. My papers argued that you could not receive a failing grade for a thesis on theory because a theory hasn't been established as a universal fact or truth thus no one is right nor wrong. Today I would fail to argue the point of a brain fart.

I should receive a consolation prize or parting gift for losing my mind...like bigger breasts. From what I understand it is perfectly acceptable to be a dumb blonde if you have a big chest to distract the men from your brushing of a stiletto to help count to ten.


The failure of challenges at work, surrounded by white walls, and very little water cooler talk has left me uninspired to write, learn or create. I feel the very core of my intelligence sucked into the internet vortex propelling me toward spontaneous Ebay purchases and drifting through Craigslist for no reason other than trying to fill 6 hours of dead time at work.

So what does this have to do with the price of corn in China. Nothing, they don't grow corn in China, DUH!! It does, however, have something to do with my blog. Instead of trying to be funny all the time (trying being key word), I am going to try (again key word) and exercise my mind so in the future you just might see opinions, thesis', algorithms, code, whatever I deem necessary to save my brain from total blondness.

I might even start with proper grammar and proofreading.



The blonde gets down to the dark root of the problem!!

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