Ouch!!!

I cracked my knee over the corner of my bed last night leaving a bruise the size of a golf ball on my knee. It usually happens when I haven't made the bed in a couple of days. The bed gets resentful it isn't being taken care.

The bed will actually reach its corner out to kick me in the shins. This isn't the first time.

Its a hateful bed!!

I think the laundry I forgot to put a way had a hand in it, too. The piles of clean folded laundry I took off the bed and set down on the floor next tot he corner had a conversation with the bed and they conspired to trip me up.

Its not my fault I couldn't deal with my bedroom. I had cars to wash, Halloween decor to set up, and bitchy notes to text to strangers that judged my dating preferences.

I have since cleaned my room and made up with my bed and laundry. Its nice to know that even if people don't forgive you, your inanimate objects will.

Although I think I heard them giggling while I slept last night!!


Beds and laundry may break my bones but words only bruise a Blonde!!

Iphone Politics

Never take a political stand by way of text on an Iphone...

The following is a preview of a heated debate using the Iphone keyboard and text:

I am fairly certain I lost.

from the iphone:

letbthe middle man revolt andbsievthe execs for malice unloss the middleman is guilty of lusting it happen unless vptomf for blackam will se permmave enough
I will not vote for a system can be repaired by one man no how well speak nor howany pink flamingos she can trap the redneck vote

end of iphone text....

Don't believe the Iphone is better than the Treo or the Blackberry just because of great ads...learn for yourself...sort of like politics...choose wisely or make a fool of yourself!!


Blondes know there is good and bad in all!!

Barack's Moratorium

Spread the wealth but don't forget the Blonde.

I too was twisted into buying more than I could afford.

Do I get 3 months moratorium on my credit card payments?

The girl at Nordstrom said I could afford the Balenciaga shoulder bag, if I charged it. I believed her and now I am stuck paying...its not fair...I should be bailed out, too!!

If you want the credit institutions to feel good about giving more credit, why not lower the credit rate on already inflated, beyond the sky, charge cards so people can get a bit of relief to help pay off the original debt?

Then they can buy more, perpetuating new spending...duh!!!

Or just bail out the titans, let the idiots have 3 months free mortgage and make the rich pay for it all!!!

Blondes believe in limits !!!

Friday Night Fright

...of a date.

Blondes have fragile egos, so when your on a date with one don't look at the brunettes that walk by and...

Never, never, never check out the young man with brunette hair directly behind the Blonde at the bar!!


Blondes are afraid of losing game!

Manopause

I just read an advertisement for Andropause. Apparently, men get menopause like woman. They get a little pudgy around the middle, depressed, and their sexual appetite diminishes...

blah

blah

blah

...and of course to help them through this time, the pharmaceutical commies have something to help.

A peepee hardener pill.

For a man, he doesn't need to lose weight, he doesn't need antidepressants.

Nope!!

He just needs a pill that will make the 'General' go from flacid to fabulously firm for eight hours.

No wonder all the men leave their wives when they hit midlife crisis.

With a penis that is so hopped up on drugs, its irrational behavior has them seeking out twenty something girls to keep their crack head (pun intended) tweaking until it comes down from the high.

I blame the pharmie commies for the high rate of divorce. That and not having separate bathrooms.

Stop watching each other pee for cricky sakes!!

Blondes say NO to drugs!!